What next?

[lilMrInvisiblesmum]

So from my other thread you'll know that we've been passed from pillar to post for 5 years in regards to some sort of diagnosis.

I have been taking the bull by the horns lately to try to sort this one way or another.

One of the things i did was to contact DSs school so i could meet with the teacher. As far as i've been led to believe there is no issue with him at school, no idea what i mean etc etc.

She returned my call today to arrange a meeting and told me that she is having issue with him and was there something amiss at home (there isn't)

I wasn't sure why now was the time that i decided to really push, but i suspect that at the back of my mind i know things are getting worse rather than better. Clearly this is the same at school.

I don't know what the problem is but now my boy is increasingly unhappy and i am never far from tears myself. What the fuck do i do now?

I've tried not to lead him in questions, but it's like pulling blood from a stone,

He has no idea what is wrong.

He says he feels different, a bit, he thinks.

He gets angry and frustrated, but can't explain what at.

He has been shouting at the children in class and has no idea why.

Help please.

bump for others with more adivce buy maybe time for meeting with teacher and senco

Do Scottish schools have a senco?

I met with the teacher.

WOW Talk about smacking you in the face.

Yes there are issues

The other children don't relate to him

There is something but she can't explain it either.

She's going to see the DHT to get him reffered to Ed Phy but that'll take weeks, were looking into P4

I can't have this go on for that long, he needs help now!

5 bloody years i've been shouting about it and finally the school are on a similar page, i should be grateful, instead i'm in floods of tears, WTF do i do now?

Phoenix - Thanks for the bump.

A meeting with the school is a good idea, find out exactly what their concerns are (and take notes!) ask them what help they are going to put into place to deal with their concerns and when. Follow this up in writing ie thank you for seeing me and arranging to put x,y, z in place for ds. Make suggestions of your own.

In the meantime, as i said previously on your other thread, make an official complaint to the NHS Care Trust about the inconsistent care (of lack of it) that your ds has received.

Phone the school and ask whether they have a SENCO, if not who is in charge of organising the special needs provisions for the school (might be the Head Teacher)

Your Paed is the person who should be holding everything together, making referrals, chasing them up etc, etc. If he/she is on holiday ask who is covering for him/her and tell them you want an appointment with that person.

Ed Psy referral is a good thing, but will take time. Ask the school when and chase them up until they give you a date.

I can understand your frustration and feeling of helplessness.

I was in exactly the same position as you, 4 years of being pushed from pillar to post, appointment after appointment, appointments not being kept, phone calls not returned etc, etc.

In August 2009, i took the bull by the horns, decided enough was enough, either take this seriously and assess/diagnosis ds or leave us alone.

I made an official complaint in August 2009 and things started to move. Assessments started to happen, reports were written and ds will be receiving his diagnosis shortly.

Thanks claw, that gives me hope, really it does.

I've spoken to OT, she is posting the report again, i've to phone her if it doesn't appear, it's written down so i don't forget.

I think i need to regroup almost, the teacher is going to get bvack to me and i'll have some questions written down for her to answer.

I'm going to write a list of things that need done and who needs contacting etc.

Everyone is getting one chance then it's complaints all the way, this just can't go on!

I know how you feel, you want something doing NOW, not next week! You seem to have a good plan put into place.

Im still fighting to get appropriate help and support put into place (and still complaining!) but i live in the hope that it will get easier and taking it one step at a time.

You could ask the OT to email the report to you, as it is in draft form, you could read through and raise any amendments you would like to make. She could then send the final copy in the post, that would save time.

Oh and for each concern the school raise, you should ask what help they plan to give.

With ds's school, as soon as i asked 'what help' they tried to fob me off with 'well it isnt really a concern, more we are just bringing it to your attention'!

Be prepared for the best/worse outcomes. Best outcome they will suggest help and support to put into place. Worse outcome they will try to fob you off, have a list of appropriate help that could be put into place if need be (ie recommendations from reports etc)

Thanks, i've noted that to ask when the teacher phones me later.

I wish you luck and remember keep posting here, there is always someone who is going through a similar thing and the parents here have great advice and are very supportive, so you are not alone.