supporting HFA anxiety in mainstream

[kissingfrogs]

I have a lovely girl I've just started supporting (voluntary work). She has an informal ASD dx and is struggling in class. She frequently has melt-downs, screaming and hitting. I see tremendous anxiety in her. I'm told she has poor concentration and tries to get away with not doing much work, but she tells me it's physically painfull to sit still, and she doesn't always understand the work (and she is bright) which I feel is due to be so preoccupied with her feelings & trying to control them that she doesn't always listen to teachers instructions (my thoughts, I may be wrong). She attaches a clip pen lid to her top lid when writing because the pressure/touch helps her concentrate. I don't think what she says is taken seriously, but I really emphasise with her. She had a visual timetable last year but not this year. I've ordered a stress ball & a tangle for to her fiddle with in class (saves her cardigan buttons!), but I wish I was better informed so that I could work on some anxiety-relieving strategies. I'm new to this.
Any ideas?

Op you sound lovely and a real support to her. Why doesn't she have a visual timetable this year?

Things that occur to me are:

• Does she have problems with understanding language?

Often you find that bright children are good at hiding this difficulty and have developed their own strategies for it.

If she is having trouble understanding the teacher's instructions this will have a knock-on effect elsewhere. Instead of asking her if she understands, ask her to tell you what she has been told to do.

Break down the instructions for her if needed. My ds finds it hard to remember more thana couple of things at a time. If asked to do A,B and then C he would do A, forget about B completely and then wonder why he couldn't do C.

• Could the inability to sit still be related to gross motor skills? If so it might help to have a wedge cushion on the seat to give her more of a 'grip' so that she's not using all her efforts to stay upright.

• If possible bring back the visual timetable. Not knowing what's happening next can be very stressful.

• One thing I can't recommend enough is to keep a record of what was happening before the meltdowns. Identifying the triggers will help in looking for ways to reduce meltdowns.

I think a visual time table is a must, dd1 always needs to know whats happening during her school day. If there is going to be a change in routine she needs to be told in advance.

Also i agree with keeping instructions simple.

Give her longer to answer questions as ASD children take longer to process things.

Dd1 only has small meltdowns (gets upset), she gets to go to a quite place/room to calm herself.

Most of dd1's anxiety comes out when she gets home.

You sound like a lovely person, i hope dd2 gets a lovely 1:1 when she starts school in september.

Thanks for your replies. I think I will ask the teacher if I can get hold of last years visual timetable and redo it for this year. Didn't ask why they stopped timetable, but whatever the reason it might be worth using one again.
Coppertop - some v useful ideas there. Gross motor skills got me thinking. I'll ask her if her chair is comfy, if she says it's not I'll get her one of those cushions. Every little bit helps.
I feel very motherly to her and really will pull out all the stops to make school a little easier for her, though I must say that the benefit works both ways as she's teaching me a lot too