Is there such a thing as an ASD friendly holiday?

[waitingforgodot]

Your experiences please?! Thinking about France but wondering if its worth the hassle

NAS has a pretty comprehensive list here.

My ds is being assessed for asd atm and we find to make a holiday good we always choose somewhere quiet ie if we go abroad we rent private and try to get away from tourist areas alicante nr benidorm is great we go there everyyear it mainly residential but each bit has swimming pools for so many residents which you get key to for your sections pool so they are nice and quiet during day as most the ppl are working.. we prepare ds by talking about the holiday weeks in advance ,we discuss all the exciting things we going to do ie go swimming every day, go beach, have fun etc how great the aeroplane ride will be and even tho he doesnt show excitement he does join in with counting how many sleeps are left etc and actually enjoys the holiday IF he is left to do his own thing when we go swimming or the beach .. have tryed crowded holiday resorts and it hasnt worked out he cant handle the crowds has loads of meltdowns difficult behaviour we become stressed so easier to do it the quiet way and we do relax and have fun xx

thanks both of you. We had a lovely time last year with a villa and private pool in Ibiza. Flight back was a nightmare though so wanted something closer (and cheaper!). Thats a great idea about the countdown with the calendar. Also Moondog, I read about your calendar idea on a different thread. Am off to see if I can find a suitable calendar in one of the pound shops tomorrow!

Yes, Godot, it will be an ideal way to prepare for the change in routine.

We have wonderful holidays, just remember to show pictures to your LO so they have an idea.
Also please remember to plan for return trip too as this is often forgotten and causes loads of problems (from those i speak too)

We love Centre Parcs, as its not too crowded, not too noisey and DDs love the activities.
HTH

I've accompanied children with ASD to Center Parcs. It does seem to work well, have done it 3 years running now with one family. Center Parcs has a fence going all around the site, so it's more tricky for children to escape. Not that they want to though, they seem to enjoy making dams in the streams... splashing around in the pool, or riding the landtrain (at Longleat). Seems to work better if activities are not planned that far in advance... but going with the flow instead. Whenever I go to CP I do tend to see quite a few SN children... so it does seem to be the place where some children with SN are happy. Won't suit all though, so if you have found something that works for your DS, stick with that - keep going back to the same place again and again and again.

we went to Cp for first time in November and it was one of the most realxing holidays ever had , so guess where were going back to this year

Thank you all, I hadn't considered CP as I envisaged noisy, splashy place a bit like a holiday camp!

CP is one of those places you either love, or hate. In my view it is a far cry from a noisy holiday camp. You can take yourself off for a walk, or bike ride and within minutes be in part of the site where all you hear is the wildlife and the occasional person on a bike.
I have several videos of CP on my YouTube Channel which may give you a feel for the place a bit - note my video skills are rather lacking!
It can get busy in the main communal areas such as the Plaza (shopping area) and Swimming Pool. However you will find that it is quieter in early evening, so having an early tea followed by a swim before bedtime I have found works well, especially with children who need to be tired out a bit to get them to sleep.
There are many message threads on Mumsnet: UK about Center Parcs. For example Center Parcs Accommodation. You will pick up lots of tips by reading what other families have done whilst at Center Parcs.

thanks nannynick-thats great!

It is pricy though. I've booked for April and just looked at activity prices and am a little shocked by the price increases this year. In December an adult evening spa session was costing £26, in April they want £36. So it won't be a cheap holiday. My tip is not to book too many activities... as there are often things you can book on the day, or day before if you feel you need to do something. For a first visit, perhaps pre-book one activity per child. Low Ropes (what used to be called Action Challenge) is good value still @£15 per person for a 2 hour physical activity (for age 8+).
How old is your child / are your children?

Center Parcs will be closer... but I expect it will be more expensive, not cheaper. Holidaying abroad seems to be lower cost than holidaying at home.

I have a 3 year old Nannynick. He loves water so ideal holiday would involve a quiet pool.

WE have always taken DS2 on holiday and after a great deal of preperation we have got him to become a really brilliant flyer.
I know they can be expensive but we started using private villas. It meant we could get special diet stuff delivered to us and we had private swimming pools plus there is less noise and fewer people to 'watch' us IYSWIM

the first few times we actually drove to France ( south) and did a booked overnight stop. He loved the ferry and copes brilliantly in the car.

Now we have a place in Spain and he asks to go all the time. We just have to pay to book seats as he needs a window seat and we are off.

I wouldn't assume that ASD means kids will struggle to fly. DS2 proves that that is not always the case.
We are doing Barbados in July and he likes longhaul best - but preperation is absoloutely key. And you have to be prepared that it may not work and be ready to cope

we do the same as pagwach - use private/self catering villas.

we have taken dd1 to Portugal, France (twice) USA and Australia. We're off to Malta this Easter, and probably Germany in the summer.

dd1 is also fine with flying (well, airports are stressful - waiting and security not good), and keeping her sufficiently ovvupied in the lounge that she doesn't irritate other passengers (when stressed she paces) can be tricky, but we manage.

the flight itself is fine. if at all pssible, with the age your dc is, ask for a baby seat belt on flights. they don't like giving them to you, but we still use one to strap dd1 in with us - we explained to the crew on ourt last flight that is was make dd1 sit in her seat, with lots of noise, for take off, or let her seat with us, as an infant would, and then once she realised all is ok she would sit in her seat again. dd1 is 5. we do have to keep her entertained to the level of an 18 month old (ie constant) on the flights, but she flies really well, tbh.

we manage holidays by making them like home but in another location. so take favoured blannket/pillow to make bed loo the same, take familiar foods, or have them delivered to us. keep the daytime schedule as similar as possible, and all the same routines. one big thing for dd1 is keeping food aas imilar as possible, so even in the heat of Queensland she was tucking into curry and spag bol every day, while we were all sitting on the beach eating ice cream . but it works for her.

Center parcs si great for us too - we've taken dd1 a few times, and last went in november last year - had a great holiday, where she even coped with the noise in thepool (noise averse) at peak times - and loved the wave machine (former water phobic child!)

god, sorry for typos - dd2 helping me

Pagwatch
How did you manage to get special diet stuff sent to you? Did you use a specific company?Have taken DS on several long haul flights when he was younger and he was brilliant. However last flight(shorthaul) was a nightmare as he just would not sit in his seat. What strategies do you use for preparation?

Silverfrog
Good idea re familiar blanket etc.
Any tips on how to entertain on the flight or manage the queuing process?

what does your ds like doing? for on the flight, we take:

sticker books/magnet books

favourite books (Gruffalo etc) - dd1 loves books, so for her, it is heaven to sit and read/be read to for hours on end (not so for us, but we take it in shifts )

last year, for flight to Oz, i invested in an iPod Touch. Absolutely heaven-sent piece of geekery. downloaded toddler games (matching pairs, simple number games, etc), put her favourite dvds on (mr tumble and similar - we also have a portable dvd player for this, again can plug in my ipod, so have hours of dvd downloaded on my ipod - saves fiddling about changing/dropping dvds)

simple games like orchard toys ones (dd1 is 5, dd2 is coming up 3) so we all played a couple of rounds of shooping list, or picture lotto etc.

the ipod was invaluable for managing queues at check in etc, as easy to carry and whip out at crucuial moments. I would also recommend trunki suitcases - gives tyou an inbuilt toy to wheel them up and down on while wating in the queue. dh is tasked to talk to the check in person, sort out seating etc, while my job is to entertain children while we wait. i tend to ignore all stares, and sit down (out of the way) next to the check in desk, and read a story. unconventional, but it works (for a while). I developed a good line in stories about "two little girls" last year - coincidentally called the same as my dds, and talked the girls through what was going to happen. so eg, one day, the two little girls woke up and it was time to go on holiday. they drove to the airport, and when they got there, they had to talkk to the lady and get their tickets for the seroplane. it was abit broing waiting while their daddy talked to the lady, but they were very good little girls, and waited nicely with mummy and listened to a story" and then would sit down and get a book out... when it works, it works well. when it doesn't, it's a disaster, because you look liek a lentil-weaver ineffectual parent.... but my girls loved it, and especially loved seeing the similarity in what the story girls were doing, and what they were doing.

ime, it worked better to be telling htem as it happened, rahrter than in advance (although we do a lot of advance prep too) - it's sort of like an ongoing reminder of all the preparation for them, I think.

we still use the two little girls stories each night before bed, to go over what has happened in the day, and also prepare for the next day if necessary.

now that dd2 has her own seat and ticket oo, we can now pack 4x cabin bags, which we use to full potential.

dd1's is full of food/snacks for the journey
dd2's is full of toys/books/games (both trunki suitcases)

dh & I both take a wheeled cabin bag too - the largest wheeled small suitcase we can fit. we have: dvd player/ipod plus cables. change of clothes for everyone. nappies/wipes. and the essential comforters for each child (especially ipportant if the flight is a long one where dc are expected to sleep, ime. no way will dd1 sleep wihtout "sleepy bear".

I htink the key is to prepare for constantly entertaining in some way, then any minute where you don't have to is a bonus

oh, on the sitting in own seat thing - try explaining to the cabin staff.

dd1 is really very good at flying, but she doe sget very bothered at take off - there's lots going on.

we found the stewards really helpful on the whole, when we exppaine to them that she is disabled, and doesn't understand. and that if they let us have an infant belt, we wuold be able to get ehr to sit with us, talk her thorough what was going on, and then as soon as she was calm, move her into her own seat.

without fail we were given an extra toddler belt. it really helped dd1 to be able to sit on our laps - tbh, it was as much the fact that she was not allowed to sit on our laps that was distressing her, and once that fear was removed, she sat happily in her own chair for most of the flight.

The portable DVD player used to work however on the last flight, DS spotted where the Captain sits with all those lovely buttons and dials and spent a lot of the flight knocking on the door to the cockpit

I think I would prefer a shorthaul and the pram used to work wonders (a zapp which we could take on board). This saved any running away which seems to be a favourite pastime in airports. However he is a bit too big for it but I suppose we could squeeze him in as a last resort!

We go to France (or stay home) now - and have done since ds was rising 5. Our car is a familiar haven for him and now he is older he can watch dvds/ play games. The only trouble with the tunnel is if there is a breakdown - and these can cause very long delays during peak times - the terminals ( like airports)are poorly equipped to entertain small children for long periods. Therefor if you use the tunnel it is worth travelling at unpopular times - ie not the night the schools break up.
It sounds like renting a property with a (small) pool might suit you (the one we go to is poolless and in the Aveyron)- so it needs to be warm enough to use it - or have a suitable spot ( conservatory/ sheltered garden) for a paddling pool. Have you tried www.happykidsholidays.com - I have no personal experience but someone on here recommended them a few years back. However with a 3 year old - just finding a suitable property to relax is most of the battle. Personally I dont like to be too isolated - a gite on the edge of a village - or in a small group . From the things that have gone wrong for us in the past (when ds was 3-4) the things that I would look for include an enclosed garden area or veranda with gate - overlooked from an shaded area I can use for relaxing/ meal preparation! We used to take a balcony net(like a long foldable cloth stairgate) with us to help with security. A dayly bread delivery if you are a long drive from shops is wonderful.
Where? There are lots of quieter ( ie less crowded and pricey) regions of France especially away from the coast.

we have a P&T that we still take along...

until last year we used to put dd1 into it, but we then found it was more upsetting for her to be taken out at security, faffed around with and then put back in, so we still take along for days out on holiday (dd1 is NOT good in supermarkets...) but check it in straight away and have dd1 walking. she is (mostly) ok with this.

we do have a sling which would, last year, still take dd1, and she is not a small girl. hold on, and I'll see what ti is.

it's a soft structured one, and dh could carry dd1 in it last August, so dd1 was jsut 5. we didn't have to use it in the end, but it gave us peace of mind to know it was there if she got very upset/did too much running away.

have just checked - we have a pikkolo baby/toddler carrier, rated to carry up to 18-20kg. I think dd1 must have been about 18kg last summer, and she is tall (about 116cm now, prob about 110 then)

thanks Silverfrog. Good idea.

When we have flown with DD1 when she was younger we used to take a little bag for her especially for flight with cards, pens, books, beads and DS This was great, but it seems as she gets older her fears do too, so we havent been aboard in 2 1/2 years.

We love CP, and we always go out of peak times. We love it and always take my mum and dad and they sit with the girls in the evening so we can have great time. There is just loads of outdoor and physical activites to wear the kids out and the pool is open till 10pm. Highly recommend it. We also went with friends this year and they have a son with ASD, and he normally realy struggles but he did well too.

Def not a busy holiday camp, very relaxing, everything at your pace and none of those terrible toy/sweet machines to cause trouble

sounds great!!
Can you go for a couple of nights