This is likely to be very long so apologies in advance.
She will be 6 next month. Physical development a bit late, eg standing and walking but never thought much about that. At 2.5 she was just saying 2 recognisable words, was referred for speech therapy but by the referral took months. I then moved house but i felt she had greatly improved as she was saying many more words. Then at 3.5 she started nursery and before long i had a letter saying she was on school action plus. I was upset but ater talking to others felt the nursery was just being silly as one of their concerns was not writing her name and people said it is fine not to write your name at 3.5. They also said i needed to get her counting p to 5 first and then 10, although at home she did almost count to 10, but would leave out 9, although she didn't always count that well.
Anyway, as there were other problems with th nursery i took her out and home educated her a while. A year later her speech was much much better and she was coming out with long sentences. Over the last year though i have found her behaviour increasingly difficult. I have since then been thinking, well nursery were making too much fuss but i think there is something, i'm just not sure what. However, I had mixed messages from people.
AT her new nursery they ahd no concerns, although said she was a bit repeptitive with her language, and toiletting was a problem(she was very late to potty train and still ahs problems now). Once she was too old for nursery i home educated again as I was unable to find local school. The HE advisor came round and saw her work and said she had good fine motor skills but most of her work was of a pre-school age ability. I told HV about her behaviour and she said she didn't know what to do about finding out if she had special needs or not as she wasn't at school and all she could do was refer for speech assessement and hearing test in case communication was a problems and that was making her frustrated, leading to bad behaviour.
She failed her hearing test but she had had a recent cold which had caused glue ear, teh speech therapist said she was a school year behind.
I finally get a school place, and they said they had no concerns, her behaviour was fine and they even thought the speech therapist would dsicharge her next time as she was very chatty. Then i get a letter saying she is on school action plus with extra lessons in numeracy and literacy. I asked teacher about it, she said oh dont worry she's doing fine, she doesn't ahve special needs. I asked why I had that letter then, she said she is very behind but that is because she has younger siblings so she is used to doing things their level and she will soon catch up. She said she is fine and doesn't need an anxious mum. I tld her I wasn't anxious but confused and frustrated, that straight after being tld there were no concerns, she is on school action plus. She said oh, she is on that as you told us you were concerned. I spoke to children centre staff about all this and they got in touch with the SENCO.
The senco arranghed a meeting to fill in a CAF form and i found out she had put DD on school action plus as she teaches her class once a week and had concerns and she was sorry the class teacher had said otherwise.
So, i am waiting to see what happens next but I still feel totoally confused about whetehr sje has a problem or not and her behaviour is getting harder for me to deal with.
Oh and to add to the confusion, the new speech therapist said the gap is closing, she is only 6 months ebhind now, rather than 12, then sent her report in the post saying she was 2 years behind!
Thanks to anyone who has managed to read all this!