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SN children

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Original poster

Today DD answered a question

24 replies

used2bthin · 26/12/2009 21:25

She is 3.3 and has a speech and language delay along with some other issues. My dad said"is that nice?" when she was eating her lunch at a family party thing and she said "yes thank you ---(name she calls him)"

It wasn't so clear that someone who didn't know her would understand but that was definately what she said which is amazing for her.I sometimes have dreams where she suddenly starts speaking and it as the same feeling.

Iknow next week I will see other children her age and feel all stressed about how far behind she is again but am really encouraged by the progress. As ever it is touched with guilt because she has been so lovely this last couple of days and I have been thinking , she is always lovely I just sometimes forget to stop and enjoy her with the stress of her being a worry medically and with all her other issues , her dad (my xp)and just me being tired etc etc.

Anyway not sure why I'm posting really, just felt like sharing with people who understand the ups and downs.

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5inthesleighbed · 26/12/2009 21:27

Fantastic . I'm sure it has made your Christmas. Well done to your DD.

Original poster

used2bthin · 26/12/2009 21:34

Thank you. It is so rare for her to answer a direct question we were all in shock! I hope it means things are improving (whatever tings are-we still don't have a cause except possibly her glue ear doesn't help) and that it wasn't a one off. Oh she also said bed really clearly the other night.

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5inthesleighbed · 26/12/2009 21:59

That really is lovely. DS2 (ASD) was pretty much non verbal until January this year. He was about the same age as your DD is now. It is lovely when they start responding with words.

It sounds like good progress to me

Original poster

used2bthin · 26/12/2009 22:07

Thankyou, sounds like your DS has been making great progress too. DD actually responding (albeit sporadically) has made me realise a bit how it must feel if your child just talks, as in when there are no s and l issues. It is lovely!

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5inthesleighbed · 26/12/2009 22:25

His speaking is quite good now, makes me well up sometimes when he talks, as I know he has come so far. He can answer 2/3 word questions now and can also ask for help when he needs it.

She will get there, and then you will be wondering when she will shut up .

Is she youronly child?

Original poster

used2bthin · 26/12/2009 23:07

Yes she is. I used to work as a nanny and then as a nursery nurse so have seen lots of children learn to talk but had forgotten how automatically it seems to happen for most. DD has developed differently and nothing has come naturally with it or thats how it feels. I feel I've been a bit of a shouty stressed out mum recently but I have been thinking today how much easier life has been since DD has been saying a bit more and doing the odd sign-so can't really compare myself to other mums whose children can communicate with them much more than DD has been able to iyswim?

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Original poster

used2bthin · 26/12/2009 23:12

PS that is great that your son now answers questions. Did he have SALT and did you feel it helped? Dd does and I have had stages of doing loads at home and then stages of burying my head in the sand and doing not much but tbh it is hard to know what has made a difference.

We've been doing a rather patronising term of weekly group SALT sessions so I think I am inclined to believe it wasn't anything to do wit them that she suddenly came out with such an appropriate answer

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CardyMow · 27/12/2009 19:34

I had 2 of my DC's with speech delay, DD didn't talk till she was 2.5, DS2 not till he was 3.6 (for 1st words), neither spoke in sentences with any meaning till 3.9 for DD and 4.9 for DS2. They are now 11yo (DD) and 6yo (DS2).....and Much as it is lovely to hear them talking.....I WISH they'd occasionally shut up NOW!!!!!....If she is understanding, and occasionally responding, I know it is a worry right now but I can tell you quite honestly that by 6 or 7, you will be wondering why you were ever worrying (and whether you'll ever get peace and quiet again...).

Original poster

used2bthin · 27/12/2009 20:47

Thanks Loudlass that is reassuring. It has really affected her life so it will be lovely if she catches up with her peers. Appointment at end of jan about her glue er too so fingers crossed they can sort it out, one less issue for her.

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chegirlwithbellson · 27/12/2009 21:34

YAY! Thats brilliant.

Questions are the thing that DS finds so hard. He has auditory processing disorder and tend to look at you like you are speaking Swahili if you ask him a question.

He is nearly 7 now and is getting better but I would have been thrilled at 3!

Well done your DD

MavisEnderby · 27/12/2009 21:52

RaggedRobin · 27/12/2009 22:01

we had this breakthrough with ds at about the same age, when he started answering questions with "yes". it really was a big step for us, so i'm thrilled for you too!

busybeingmum · 27/12/2009 22:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

used2bthin · 27/12/2009 22:39

Thanks all for your lovely comments. DD has only recently started saying yes and no and the yes is very very rare. She tends to look completely blank when asked a question then start screetching if choose for her and its not what she wated, she doesn't seem to get the connection between answering and getting what she wants!

Chegirl I had been looking at auditory processing disorder to learn more as some things I'd read on here seemed familiar.

Sadly we spent last night in hospital but she was an absolute star and so I am especially proud of her today.

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busybeingmum · 28/12/2009 00:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

linglette · 28/12/2009 14:29

Another one here who understands your excitement about the question.........thrilled for you.

Wouldn't it be awful if we couldn't come here and find someone who understands?

Original poster

used2bthin · 28/12/2009 20:33

busybeingmum yes the dreams are a bit depressing to wake up from! But very encouraged by her speech the last few days she's just been saying more and more. I'm wondering if its because we've done less but then that is probably the old guilt at work again!

Thats lovely about your DS bossing you around now and the story from last night, signing has been really helpful to us too and I love her little train sign, she does it so seriously.

linglette yes awful, mnet is brilliant but I like this section much more for stuff about DD's issues.

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5ringinginthenewyear · 28/12/2009 20:39

Used2b, ds2 went to a nursery attached to an ASD school for a year and the SALT came in nearly every day and gave each child 1:1 one day a week.

Also, we went back to basics with language/questions. Instead of asking ds2 if he wanted a drink, we would say "DS2, orange Or blackcurrant", giving clear choices. At first we used something he liked and something he didn't and then gradually gave two things he liked, and he eventually got the gist of it.

Your DD sounds like a little star

Original poster

used2bthin · 28/12/2009 21:02

Thanks 5ringinginthenew year she has had a lot to put up with.

I am going to try a similar thing with choices, DD is so resistant to it , had a bit of a problem with it today in fact, I gave her a choice and she just looked a bit irritated then started doing everything she could to distract me like playing her piano toy and just generally looking straight past me when I tried to get her attention. Must be avoiding questions maybe because she knows she can't always answer? Will try starting with things I kow she will be sure about though and keep at it.

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linglette · 28/12/2009 22:42

DS2 was also 3.3 when started saying "yes".

Now at 4.4, he's getting more and more fluent.

All the hard work is worth it.

CardyMow · 28/12/2009 23:56

I agree with linglette, all the hard work is worth it. I truly believe after years of no communication, once they get to the stage that OP's DC is at, it just seems to 'blossom' from there. for you, and honestly, my DS2 is 6yo now, and although his sentences sound a bit yoda-ish (my drink that is etc), he never shuts up.

CardyMow · 29/12/2009 00:00

OH and about the glue ear, are they looking at grommets? I found that with my DD (who had chronic glue ear) that by the age of 9, the ears open up anyway, and the glue ear resolves itself. We didn't go down the grommets route for a number of reasons (including my PCT being generally crap), and it was fine by the time she was 9. And the ENT said she was late with that having been a premie. Turns out that when the glue ear went, it was shown that it had been covering up how bad her hearing loss really was, but hey ho. She manages now, still lip reads a lot and has to be at the front of the class, but speaks (mostly) understandably, and doesn't sign any more. She'ss 11.10 now.

CardyMow · 29/12/2009 00:02

And have I turned into a snake while I wasn't looking?? (she'ss...)

Original poster

used2bthin · 29/12/2009 21:05

Thanks, so reassuring to talk with others further ahead.

Loudlass she was going to be referred to discuss grommits and hearing aid then it got slightly better and she passed a hearing test (after failing three in a row below 40decibels)but then her ear drum perforated ad se has been referred to ent again so am not sure what they will say, I suppose it depends on the tests but I am really hoping something is doe because it is so hard to tell what is the glue ear and what is the delays and if she would have delays if she could hear iyswim especially as the glue ear started when she was one ish so a crucial time for language development.

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