Breast feeding and ASD

[WeThreeNinks]

I hope this doesn't go pearshaped.

Can'tr post this on the feeding forum as I would like more specialised input.

Basically, DS was BF and BF very intensively as a newborn. I knew from the failure BF DD that I didn't make much milk so DS was constantly attached.

He thrived and put on weight, never even lost a bit as newborns do.

But over the next year he refused completely ANY formula presented in ANY vessel, bottle or cup.

I was happy to BF but I did want a break at night or after he was a year old, to go out for an hour or two.

Finally he accepted Hipp Organic so DH could help, it changed my life sleep-wise.

But DS still wants a little BF whenever I sit down years later.

I wouldn't mind but I read about people feeding toddlers who say that their DC say lovely things to them. I don't get that. Not at all.

DS grabs me with his mouth and with his fingers and twiddles with the other hand, twisting my flesh. He has done since he was a larger baby.

If I didn't love the only opportunity that I have for closeness with my son I would feel kind of used as if I were an object. I put up with it because it is the only time he snuggles up to me.

I really want to stop it after Christmas, I feel that I've done my bit. But I don't know how. The BF helplines keep on about letting the child decide. I don't think I can do that any more.

Hi, me again

I bf ds until he was 14 months but stopped because I was ttc. I feel immense guilt that I did not continue and think that he could well have benefitted from it and so would I have had what you describe, some closeness.

Also, it releases oxytocin which has been shown in some studies to reduce the autism traits a little.

I am interested in what you say about the intense feeding at the beginning right down to the not losing any weight as my ds was the same. The HV treated me like I was exaggerating when I said that ds fed all the time, but he did.

Anyway, I'm not an expert but I did do peer supporter training and I think the key is to reduce and distract, offering alternatives. Have you phoned a bfing helpline? There are good bfcs and bad ones but generally I think you could get some helpful information on how to stop. They are not supposed to be judgemental.

Oh hello Starlight

I phoned the helplines a few months ago but they seem to be keen on DS stopping when he wants to as regards to BF.

I always thought he'd do it when the time was right but given the other behaviours maybe not.

As you can imagine, MIL and the HV are horrified that I still "let" him BF, but he is very prone to D&V and won't drink anything but BM or milk, no juice or water.

I wonder if his recurring stomach bugs are due to his condition.

FNN sorry but I love seeing you on MN, wherever, it makes me

How old is your DS and how much understanding does he have?

Could you replace the BF with something else that he is really interested in?

As for the stomach bugs, my dd's (both ASD) rarely get stomach bugs, dd1 gets one roughly once a year and dd2 has only ever had one D&V bug (but offten gets a runny bottom), a lot of ASD children have low immune systems due to poor diet/restricted diet. Is he a good eater?

He is a terribly picky eater, still has an awful lot of cows milk that's about all the protein he gets, no meat, fish, eggs or cheese. Thanks for answering the question about D&V

I wish I could find a substitute for BF. Even if he has his favourite melon or a bottle / cup if I'm on the sofa and he fancies it, nothing else will do.

He's 2.5 with a bit of understanding. I've tried telling him it's all gone but he gets enraged. Might have to resort to putting plasters over my nipples!

Would he understand the question:

'Breastfeed (or whatever you call it) or sweetie (with water)?'

or redirecting/distracting, so whenever he asks you get out his favourite train (confiscating a few favourite toys in advance so that they are novel). Something with lights or that spins or both are high motivators too.