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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

I think I will tell the police!!!

19 replies

devientenigma · 05/12/2009 02:42

I was physically assaulted by my nearly 9 yo son tonight(again). Only this time he's broke my nose!!! I think I will do him for assault LOL x
On a more serious note, it hurts!!
Just don't know how to manage him
Take care x

OP posts:

sarah293 · 05/12/2009 09:36

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TotalChaos · 05/12/2009 09:38

oh you poor thing, how rotten. Agree with Riven that it may be worth giving police a call to get it on record.

borderslass · 05/12/2009 09:45

Something I've been told to do on many an occasion its got to the stage with my boy that when he starts I wonder about how much longer I can cope and consider giving him up to care but I can't do it to him.
Nearly walked out on them in November it got too much AGAIN.

Goblinchild · 05/12/2009 09:45

It would be a good idea to set up a dialogue with the local police, and the community officer so that future incidents have them aware of his needs.
If they understand whet they are dealing with, their response will be more informed than if they rush in to a violent domestic with no knowledge of the circumstances.
You also need advice and support from somewhere on restraint techniques used in EBD and other schools so that you have the chance to control him without injury to either party.

sarah293 · 05/12/2009 09:47

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Message withdrawn

Original poster

devientenigma · 05/12/2009 10:27

Thanks for this everyone. My ds doesn't go out alone in the community anyway as he needs supported. You can also tell he's disabled as he is down syndrome. He is just so severly delayed in a way that not much registers with him, he functions around 18 month. There has been times when I have felt like giving up(everything is a battle)I often just sleep in the car for a break as I have noticed me and hubby disagree more and more.
Recently (over the past 2 years at least)there have been a number of people complain about ds's behaviour, including his cardiologist. He is under the behaviour team for a long list of issues but progress is so slow. He's been with them 5 year and still working on going to school and now brushing teeth.
Thanks again anyway and take care x

OP posts:

sickofsocalledexperts · 05/12/2009 13:43

You poor thing, my heart goes out to you. Have you tried CAMHS and asked for calming medication?

TotalChaos · 06/12/2009 21:29

how's things today?

StarlightMcKenzie · 06/12/2009 21:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

saintlydamemrsturnip · 06/12/2009 21:49

Record it.

When SS reduced my support resulting in me ending up very bruised I emailed them and said 'you reduced my support and now I'm bruised'. Had a SW on my sofa within 12 hours (and support levels increased).

JJWMummy · 07/12/2009 14:45

Hi Devi

I would definately contact CAMHS if you can, we had a stand off with SS not to long ago because they refused to provide us with restraint training, despite my DS1 (10) frequently losing it and punching/kicking/biting us. We've had a long discussion with CAHMS and finally decided to trial Respiridone which is an anti psychotic drug, it is supposed to mellow the tempers but takes a few weeks to get into the system, it does have side effects as with all these things, one of which is weight gain, not that this is a problem for us as J is as thin as a rake. The other thing to mention is J has had to have an ECG and bloods taken to make sure he is healthy before taking these meds, I noticed your lad is under cardio already so might be an issue.

So sorry to hear you are struggling so much though, I csan sympathise. Em

VirginPeachyMotherOfSpod · 07/12/2009 14:48

Hugs but IMO he's too young for the police tocare (have a similar son who has knocked me unconscious a few times)- ten is the minimum interest age IIRC.

Of course,police officers vary and so doaprents- I've never had the guts to actually do it, did come very close to telling LEA and SSD to find him temp boarding or foster care or I would walk though.

you have my sympathy, itsa taboo and it hurts in a great many ways.

borderslass · 07/12/2009 15:08

If he's only functioning at the level of a 18 month old I doubt the police would do much anyway you have my sympathy, it is hard when you have to deal with severe behavioral issues but you need to get something in place before he gets bigger and stronger than you, because that is a nightmare situation to be in.

ByTheSea · 08/12/2009 18:19

Unfortunately, it came to this for us with our very violent DS2-12, who has developmental trauma/RAD. Involving the police has actually helped us to get some of the services we need, as it provides supporting evidence for SS.

Original poster

devientenigma · 09/12/2009 00:23

Thanks everyone,
I know it's hard to make a complaint about your own child but I definatly think it's on the cards. He is just so strong and at times quick, before even I can defend myself.
We have gates made by adaptations for different reasons and one of these is at the kitchen...he loves heat and food!!! though he's on a low fat diet. He can break through the gate to get to the fridge thats how strong he is!!
Meds have been mentioned a few times in the past but thats it.
I feel much happier also knowing he's had an early night tonight...he's just gone to bed, so i'm off to tidy up.
Thanks again, take care x

OP posts:

Davros · 09/12/2009 07:52

I baulked at the phrase "giving him up to care" as I have a DS (14 yrs) in an excellent residential school. It doesn't have to be all or nothing, i.e. being lamped fulltime at home or carted off fulltime to "care". I know it is hard work and takes some doing but you need respite and maybe a residential placement which can be weekly or termly. We are not the only family I know whose lives have been turned around for ALL of us by going down this route, especially our DS. I would speak to Community Police if possible, I think they have got better at dealing with these sort of situations. A friend recently had to call the Police to deal with her 15 year old DS who has AS and they were fantastic and got through to him about going to a residential assessment.

claw3 · 09/12/2009 08:24

Devientenigma , you poor thing, do you get any help at all or even a break every now and then?

I grew up with a special needs brother, who was very violent, do you have any other children?

borderslass · 09/12/2009 08:43

Davros it is only when he's at his worst i've thought of it there is no residential suitable for him where we are we tried 4 years ago and missed out because that year the school was fully subscribed by christmas the education/social work think because he's ok in school it doesn't matter. Problem we have is we still don't have a formal diagnosis and wont have under the child team as they have said because he interacts with his carers he's not autistic,school says he fits all the criterea. I didn't mean to offend anyone and i'm sorry if I did.

Davros · 09/12/2009 12:28

Of course not, you have enough to deal with without worrying about me! You have so much on your plate and sounds like you've been round and round. It stinks.

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