Meeting with the SENCO... what should I say?

[Aranea]

Hello all,

I have got a meeting arranged with the school's senco, which I assume is a good thing but I don't know what I should be trying to achieve really. Any advice?

4yo DD has difficulties with her gross motor skills and has recently finished a course of physiotherapy. She has responded well to this and can now stand on one leg, hop, do forward rolls, and just about walk up stairs using alternate legs.

But she is still a clumsy mover and behind her peers (can't skip, for eg). And we have seen an OT who says she has sensory problems, overperceiving movement which explains why she is so very frightened of swings, roundabouts, jumping off things etc. She also has poor co-ordination. I asked him whether it might be dyspraxia (she flaps when she is excited, which made me wonder) but he said he didn't like the term.

He seemed a little overzealous to me, and said he thought she had problems with her fine motor skills, which I disagree with. He also said that he thought dd's dislike of large noisy groups would be part of her sensory difficulties. He told me he would devise a programme of exercises which she would be so happy to do that she would not even realise she was doing exercises. I was delighted as it is a battle getting her to do her physio exercises. What he sent me was a list of her least favourite activities (swinging etc) to be performed for 20 mins twice a day!!

Sorry about the extensive background, but to cut to the chase - dd has now started reception and is settling in well. But obviously I have no idea how her physical difficulties will affect her school life.

What should I want out of the meeting with the senco? I feel a bit at sea and don't want to waste an opportunity to get her help and support, but don't really know what she might need.

Give the SENCO a bullet point list of the reasonable provisions that you'd like the school to make for her. Flag up any needs or possible areas that she's going to need support with, ask what sort of provision is available for her physio needs in school.
You are the expert on your child's specific needs, and by working with the school you can ensure that she gets a good start. Be clear and precise if you can, and say the school can ring/email if they have any questions that they need to ask as the term rolls on, sometimes it is a simple query that doesn't need a meeting.
Keep a written log of everything discussed and agreed.

Just because the OT doesn't like the term Dyspraxia (and I agree in so much as it covers quite a broad range of scale of difficulties), it doesn't mean that Dyspraxia isn't a recognised condition. It sounds like a really odd thing for an OT to say. And it's hard enough to persuade a child to do OT exercises without those OT exercises being the child's least favourite activities - and 20 mins of anything twice a day seems a bit much. Is there anyway you could see anyone else?

Re the SENCo - it's as much you listening to her thoughts as vice versa. She may well suggest an IEP, which is useful for tracking progress and identifying difficulties, and presumably through feedback from the teacher she will have some thoughts re the fine motor skills.

Thank you goblinchild. I feel a bit out of my depth. I have no idea what provisions I would like them to make really.

I suppose I am worried that she will feel miserable and inadequate in PE lessons and concerned for her socially if she doesn't handle life in a large noisy group well (and flaps in a peculiar way!). What sort of thing might they do to help her?

Thanks Hassled - the OT is at our local child development centre. I had assumed that one didn't have much choice... do you mean we should consider a private assessment, or is it possible to ask for an other opinion on the NHS?

I must say that on reflection I think he has been rather unhelpful.

Think of what you do to help her.
Steps? Dressing? Running in the playground?
What would you want someone to enable her to do if you weren't there?
That's why you need to keep a friendly, informal dialogue running with the school so that they can say 'We've given her a named adult in the playground whose job it is to keep and eye on her and make sure that if she needs a hand there is someone who is watching for her in particular. And you can say 'Thank you...have you considered...?
Also supporting her with different exercises and games with friends that she'd enjoy. One dyspraxic I taught needed a term of stepping through a hoop before he moved onto slo-mo skipping.
But you are the expert, your voice counts.

I meant see if there's any way you could be put on another OT's list, but I'm not sure how you could go about that. Private hadn't actually occurred to me as an option but if you can afford it it's certainly worth a shot.

Just see how it goes - you won't cover everything in the first meeting, but if they do go down the IEP route then you should be invited to review it at least termly, if not half-termly, so you'll be able to contribute more once you see how your DD is getting on. Re the social stuff - you'd be amazed how tolerant 4 and 5 year olds can be. They just accept other children's little quirks as normal. Don't worry too much .

I think I will investigate whether it is possible to be put on another OT's list. I wonder how it works.

I suppose the thing is that I actually help dd with relatively little. I help her with climbing, but apart from that I tend to insist she does it herself if it's something like dressing (am paranoid that she will be last in changing rooms at school so have been being very mean for months about it, and it has finally paid off I think). And other stuff that she is genuinely scared of, I just don't make her do. I have no sense really of how much it matters or what they are likely to do at school that might make it feel important.

Maybe it just isn't that big a problem. Um. She is happier now that she can hop, as she was aware that all her friends could do it. But mostly she just avoids difficult situations and is queen of the diversion.

Then just kep talking and questioning the school when you need to. Your daughter sounds like a star! 'Queen of the Diversion'

Dear Aranea

Dialogue is important. Discuss with the SENCO her fears, and the fact that she avoids activities which might uncover her difficulties.

An IEP should include

1. Problems or issues, including confidence/ self-esteem.
2. Targets - like hopping, throwing or catching
3. How it is going to be achieved
4. A review date.

Make sure the school don't do stupid tihngs like let kids pick their own teams for sport, so that she is the last one picked.

Encourage her to do sport, otherwise the gap will get bigger as she gets older. My two are massively dyspraxic. Siging them up for martial arts really helped - all that punch with the left, kick with the right helped their balance and their left/ right orientation.

Just to clear up jargon, IEP stands for Individual Education Plan.

It is there to help the teacher plan specific tasks that your child can manage with and without support.

I would have thought that the school will want to do a bit of an assesment of your dd's abilities on their own, so that they can also identify areas where she might need help. I think if you go into the meeting just asking about the things that you want to know, and with an open mind, they will probably have questions for you too. Don't expect everything to be covered and sorted at this first meeting, as it will be an ongoing thing. Just make sure that at the end of the meeting you book a time slot for your the next meeeting, which may well produce a better plan of action as they will have had time to get to know your dd. It might be worth telling them that you want to work alot on building her confidence with movement in that first term, as if she scared of doing certain things it will be very hard for her to progress. If they do give you an IEP (which I think they should)then I would want them to work massively on praising you daughter for every tiny achievement she makes, and givinglots of encouragement. Sometimes if things like that aren't documemted, teachers will forget to make that little bit of extra effort that can make so much difference simply because they are so busy.

Also, what about your dd's pre school or nursery? If she went to one? Did she ever have an IEP there? Maybe you could talk to them for some advice about the meeting and about things they feel she could do with extra help with. They should give you all their notes and observations. Don't worry if she has already left, they should still be open to helping you.

Hi Aranea
Sorry - just found you question/thread so you've probably moved on a lot since August, but I had a couple of thoughts...
Your Senco should be seeking external advice to inform the IEP, not just setting targets willy nilly. I'm guessing your OT or PT might be the most important/appropriate person. They could/should also be invited to IEP reviews, even if they're too busy to attend.
Every Local Authority also has a statutory responsibility to provede an independent parental support service to help people think of useful questions, know what should be happening for their child, and that obligations are being carried out appropriately, eg reviews being held on time, etc. Ours is called Parent Partnership, but if you look up your LA website it should be fairly easy to find.
Hope that helps.