Could this be Dispraxia/ ASD?

[Sareyggs]

I am so worried about my 2.3 year old DS. He was resuscitated at birth and has since seen a Paed every 3-6 months. He now also gets speech therapy and his nursery have requested a support worker. Please find below some of his traits, any thoughts? I believe he will not be diagnosed until he is 3 but I am going out of my mind with worry in the meantime, nobody seems to be able to help me:-

1. He doesn't actually use words and speak, even though he has a large vocab. He will use words to name things if you ask him ( mainly animals which he is obsessed with ) but he doesn't communicate so if he wants something he tries to get it himself or stands beside it and cries. He doesn't say mummy or daddy but if I ask him who I am he will say mummy. Speech therapist seems quite concerned, but hasn't really done much, as yet. He also talks in his own language most of the time or repeats parts of the stories from he favourite books 2)He doesn't follow instructions or give you things, eg if you ask him to get his shoes he ignores you and carries on playing. Bizarely enough if you ask him if he wants a biscuit he runs to the cupboard so sometimes I am not sure if he is just bloody minded.
2. He doesn't point or wave, he did at 12 months, then stopped. Also rarely says hello or goodbye, although has on occasion.
3. He is a really messy eater and will only eat yoghurt from a spoon, using his fingers for everything else and takes food out his mouth once he has chewed it.
4. He won't hold a pencil and scribble and won't use a shape sorter, apart from to get the shapes out.
5. He hand flaps and stomps when excited and spins alot of the time
6. He is not very interested in other children and just reads books at nursery obsessively flicking the pages. he won't take part in any group activities. He is not even that interested in his 3 month old brother, although he can say his name.
7. He gets obsessed with things- books, his toy animals. He says "tiger roar" to me pretty much about 20-30 times a day!
8. He is very clumsy and not very spatially aware. He is always banging into things and falling. he still doesn't look very steady on his feet, he didn't crawl until 13 months and walked at 18 and half months.
9. he doesn't climb, can't go up and down stairs on his own and can't kick a ball.
10. He seems over sensitive to certain things-strong sunlight, certain pitches. He won't eat things that are too hot or too cold. He still puts everything in his mouth.
11. He doesn't really play. he will occasionally play with his cars but he mainly just flicks through books and puts plastic animals in and out a box, naming them as he does so.

It sounds all very negative doesn't it but he is actually a beautiful, happy, little boy. I just know he is different from others his age and I just want the best for him. At the moment everyone is telling me they are concerned but nobody is actually helping.

Hi

Its all a bit worrying isn't it. Go with your hunch and get him properly assessed. Its utterly yuck and do cut yourself some slack and give yourself time but at least if you go through this early on then it's kind of over and done with and you can get therapy earlier which is something I regret that I did not do.

Honest answer. It does ring alarm bells with me. Lots of this stuff particularly the spinning does sound like my chap at that age. The clumsy thing and being able to walk across a room and fall over NOTHING also rings true. My son has major dyspraxia plus aspie, plus S&L plus dyslexia, plus auditory and visual processing. However, one thing you learn is that they are all different. I would say that S&L specialists are very good at spotting stuff. If you are now feeling really crap please read my mummy boasting thread - it might cheer you up!

Thanks flyingmum. I am almost in tears reading your reply, only because it is so nice to talk to another person who has been through similar experiences. I have kept myself away from other mums I met when he was a baby because he seems so different from their children and also they selfishly make me feel bad and don't know what to say when I am honest about his challenges. When did your son get a diagnosis? Everyone is now involved with my son- HV, Paed, SALT,he has even been referred to educational psycologist- but I feel like I am playing a waiting game. Also how to you get others to understand what you are going through? my mother in law just says he will be fine and I need to stop worrying, my mum used to say this but now she doesn't really know what to say as he doesn't seem to be improving. On another note is your thread about your son sailing? I think I read it on another message board and it did cheer me up, your boys sound fantastic!

hey there, firstly i want to give you totally unMNetty . I remember the feelings of realisation that all was not well, the crippling fear of the 'A' word.

Quite honestly? yes it does rather sound like autism with a touch of dyspraxia. But its really NOT the end of the world, honestly its not. If you had one wish for your child what would you want? 99% of mums would wish for happiness - and he DOES sound like hes a very happy little chap.

FIrst port of call is a referral from GP to paed, and take it from there.

THEN, take time for yourself and go easy on yourself. Its easy to get all caught up in therapies and therapists, places to go, people to see, methods to try, things to avoid - forgetting that you need time to get your head around it all. Try to stay being his mum and not his carer and enjoy him for who HE IS, not worrying about who HE ISNT, i understand thats easier said than done of course.

When the panic has subsided and life has settled a bit, you will find that you can look at your son objectively and see what he needs help with rather than trying everything and wearing yourself to a frazzle and accomplishing nothing but creating headaches!

THere is a whole wealth of info here, and the ladies here are wonderful, always with great advice, an ear for proud mummy moments (which we all love to hear, and you too will have them!) and a shoulder to lean on when you need it.

I am a mum to 5 sons. DS1 has ADHD and dyspraxia (amongst others), he could fall over the pattern on the carpet! DS2 has very mild ASD and dyslexia. DS3 is NT (tho is very often the worst behaved!). DS4 has Aspergers Syndrome and specific language impairment. DS5 is only 3.2y but has autism, GDD (functions as a 12mth old) dyspraxia, has little understanding, and is non-verbal.

I knew that DS5 was autistic at 18mths. when he was 2 the speech therapist at the time said "theres only 3 reasons a child would stop/regress in development 1) head trauma 2) epilepsy causing head trauma 3) an autistic spectrum disorder. Not counting rare chromosomal/genetic degenerative causes". I feel that the loss of pointing would fall into category 3.

On a positive note: I feel that your sons speech and understanding are extremely good signs. DS5 was very much 'locked in his world' but with gentle but persistant playing and 'intrusion' has worked wonders, not only for my child but many children. He is a very affectionate and loving child who brings me things (not always to play together, but hey its a start!), something i wouldnt have believed a year ago. It does bring me hope for the future. Autism is just a word, not a sentence. XXX

hi i am a mum of an asd child and i run a support group if you are unsure you could go to a local support group in your area
please log into www.treatingautism.co.uk
most aad kids have no eye contact a few or no social skills
hand flapping spinning like routines no speech or highly verbal
you might also wish to look up the sonrise program the listening programme nat.autistic society yahoo groups such as autism biomedical europe low functioning autism mb12valtex, hch yahoo group for homeopathy, and finally the very best of information www.autism .com which is the autism research institute who help heal kids on the spectrum if in doubt dont wait till your ds is 3 research now you might also want to ask your local camhs for an assessment
and ask for disability living allowance for disabled children from the government
good luck!!youmay also be entitled to carers allowance!!

Thanks to everyone who has responded and your fab support. Can I get support even though he hasn't been diagnosed? We saw a Paed before he was 2 and he said he wasn't displaying signs of classic autism, although that was 3 months ago now, we are going back next week. His eye contact comes and goes and was actually pretty good at the last appointment. He has approx 150 words but mainly just uses them to name things rather than communicate.

I would love to meet other mums in my area but unsure how I go about this if he isn't diagnosed? i have also been told this prob won't happen until he is 3,pushkar what is camhs? can I get an assessment here quicker than through the normal medical channels?

Thanks to everyone who has responded and your fab support. Can I get support even though he hasn't been diagnosed? We saw a Paed before he was 2 and he said he wasn't displaying signs of classic autism, although that was 3 months ago now, we are going back next week. His eye contact comes and goes and was actually pretty good at the last appointment. He has approx 150 words but mainly just uses them to name things rather than communicate.

I would love to meet other mums in my area but unsure how I go about this if he isn't diagnosed? i have also been told this prob won't happen until he is 3,pushkar what is camhs? can I get an assessment here quicker than through the normal medical channels?

sorry just getting used to mumsnet...I posted it twice!

another thing I wanted to ask...it is genetic? i also have a 15 week old baby, DS2, I am now praying that he is ok. DS1 had a traumatic birth and had to be resuscitated, DS2 didn't. Ds2 seems very sociable smiles constantly, good eye contact but i now no this means nothing as so did DS1 at the same age. How likely is it that ASD is birth related or genetic?

Hi Saretggs, WElcome to the the SN pages. THey are a wonderful source of information and support. Im probably not going to say anything new here, but other than you are coping amazingly well. I have two boys (2.8 ASD and 1 NT[we think]) so similar to you. Not mush time to reply so a few things

• my DS1 was dx'd at 2.5. You should be able to get a clear indication of what hte professionals think earlier than 3. Push for a referral through your HV, GP or Paed. Push, push push if this is what you want.
• dont listen to anything other than your own gut. The amount of people who told me not to worry, that I was being overly-anxious was... well... everyone. You know your child best, follow your instincts

-My ds shares some of the traits you mentioned but by no means all - their langauge delay sounds very similar. ASD comes in all sorts of different manifestations, no tow kids are hte same. Some you mention are present in ASD but by the same token they are not exclusive to ASD. If you look at the NAS website you will see by definition ASD is defined by a core triad of impairments.

• they do think that there are genetic links in ASD these days, but nothing is in concrete. Like all things ASD there is a lot of grey! FOr some families it is a one off, some people have more than 1 kid with ASD. HOWEVER please, please, plesae do not worry yourself about that. You are unlikely to see many ASD signs before 18 months and before then you will probably know in your heart whether it is likely. My DS2 turns 1 tomorrow and I would be absolutely floored if he is anything other than NT. I am also unsure if ASD has anything to do with trauma from the birth, but from my experience it did not.

-finally - your DS is wonderfully young and much can be done in early intervention. Leaps nad Bounds sort of stuff. Regardless of dx or not, there are obviously some delays, but MANY little boys suffer these and MUCH can be done. Last week my family started therapy to help my DS develop and we are hopeful that down the track he will fit into hte mainstream. ANd even in the past 2 months since dx, we feel our DS has come along really nicely through our extra intervention nad attention. When he gets stuck in his water play or repetitive spinning we get in there and interrupt it nad make sure he includes us in this self-stimulatory behaviour. THere are many great books which can give you a thousnad ideas on how to engage with him better.

ANyway - follow your gut, push for a referral if this is what you want. It is not all doom nad gloom. THere is much that can be done in helping your little boy along.

good luck and keep us updated on how you go,

i just wanted to reiterate how lucky your DS is to have suc a caring mummy. THe notes you re taking nad the obvious love you have for your happy little lad is obvious. He sounds just wonderful. Whatever hte outcome is, it will be ok. He will still be the lovely little boy who gives you so much pleasure. It is so hard not to worry yourself sick, but rest assured that from the sound of it you are doing everything you can and helping him come along and that he is going to be just fine.

thank you so much mum2fredandpudding for your kind words, it really has helped, I am in a very anxious place at the moment! However what ever happens I know my precious boy is not at the worst end of the spectrum as he is verbal and does interact, albeit not all the time and in his own special way! He is also very bright ( well maybe I'm biased but he certainly seems it ). He has a wicked sense of humour so we do get a lot back. We have Paed appt on thurs so I will keep you posted.
thanks again and your boys are lucky to have you as a mum too, you are far braver than I am at the momentx