I just told a Dr I think DD has Aspergers. What next?

[EccentricaGallumbits]

DD is 11. long list of years of angst and behaviour stuff. Had appointment with paed today to follow up something else and I took a deep breath and finally admitted that I think her issues are part of something bigger. I've read lots about AS and she fits lots of the characteristics.

Paed was v nice. He is referring her to CAMHS. Thing is we had an appointment there about 2.5 years ago when DD was refusing to go to school. It was not a success. Basically they were assessing us as a family and had already made huge assumptions about us and were placing blame firmly with me. Lots of questions about whether I shouted alot, how I delt with her behaviour and insinuating that I was some sort of monster abusive mother, all in a 15 minute apointment with people who didn't know us and had no idea why we were there. I can see their point, I assume lots of behaviour issues do come down to wrong sort of parenting but they talked to me like I was very stupid and I'm not.

So we now have to wait and see them again.

So in the mean time should I be going down a different route? Would an educational psychologist be worth seeing? Should I pay to see someone rather than waiting 18 months before going through the hell of CAMHS again?

Any advice greatfully recieved. i'm feeling a bit weird about finally admitting something is wrong.

How about getting in touch with your dd s' school senco? You could explain your concerns and if the senco thinks something isn't right then they may refer your dd to an EP. ???

My ds is only 3.8 y old (verbal dx of asd by a paed.), the nursery senco has refered him to an EP for assessment. Now waiting...

Good luck.

thanks. Will try. bad timing though as she is about to leave primary for secondary. worth a chat before she changes schools though.

Would have told Paed at that time (is this a community paed btw, you should ideally be seeing a developmental paed) that you've seen CAMHS already.

The Ed Pysch cannot diagnose as these people are not medically qualified to do so but can make recommendations re schooling (they may recommend statementing). Usually school get the EP in.

If you can afford it I would be seeing a developmental paed privately and get an opinion that way. It'll be a lot quicker than CAMHS who can be worse than useless in some circumstances. They certainly have their place but ASD is not always their specialty.

I would be speaking to the SENCO at DD's future secondary school as a matter of course.

I did tell him. He sympathised and would put that in his letter.

so. developmental paed then.

Heart sinking at thought of broaching this with secondary. I don't think they are very good with any sort of SEN. They're crap with DD1s dyslexia and know other people who have struggled to get any sort of IEP in place.
Unfortunately they are the only school in the area. Will ask current school SENCO to advise.

Kepp swinging from relief that I've finally faced this and utter crappnes.

Attila gives good advice. if you got a private dx you'dprobably have to follow with an NHS one but at elast yu'd ahve all the assessments ready, huge step forwards.

Could you ask agin about referral but this time to a PAed? refinitely IME only way to get results

BTW your story re crapness of CAHMS is SO common , had no dealings myself thank goodness

EP DEFINITELY worth seeing, if she has probs at school they should already have referred her. Shows their crapness if they don't think they need good links with EP service. EP does not need a DX to see her but will identify how your DD's needs will affect her schooling and come up with recommendations for the school and statementing if needed. EP report is also good to stick in with a DLA application later.

In the meantime, sympathies for you - it is a total rollercoaster ride. DX was best thing that could have happened to us, so nice to dump all that 'maybe' stuff from my brain and move on with a clearer idea of the future. Good luck.