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DS with aspergers and new born

5 replies

yawningmonster · 23/05/2009 09:45

DS is 4.7 and while he has coped so much better with DD's arrival than I hoped he has regressed somewhat behaviourly (to be expected) I can cope when we are at home but am at a bit of a loss when out and about. I have known throughout my pregnancy that this would become an issue but just haven't been able to come to a practical answer other than never going out on my own with both children.
What the hell do I do when out and about and ds loses it??? I can't just leave DD and hoist him off to the car to calm down (which is what has worked in the past, he needs a safe place to move through his emotions and carseat is so far inescapable) I can't leave him to rampage, run off, damage people and property randomly while I get DD to safety and then when we are in the car I can't safely put DD in beside him until he calms down. So what do you do...he cannot hear when he is out of control, he cannot tolerate much of anything until he is back in control, so no cuddling, talking etc...he just spirals further out of control.

OP posts:
staryeyed · 23/05/2009 14:36

Sorry I don't have any advice but in the same situation so will watch for replies.

bullet123 · 23/05/2009 15:04

Would you consider something like a Major buggy for him and a sling for your baby, just whilse you are out with both of them? When your baby gets a bit bigger you could switch to one of those back carriers.

HelensMelons · 23/05/2009 15:05

Yes, it can be very tricky. DS2 (8,asd)

Lots of preparation can help, yellow post it pad for visual drawings if necessary, blue badge for car so can park closer (get out of shop and have car nearer by) which helps with the running off. Watching for the signs and prioritising or bribary, First food shopping what would you like, then waterstones, or then sweets.

I have 2 other dc's and it can be a bit hectic if they all kick off. I have also competely abandoned shopping when things are bad.

Good luck!

Nyrrem · 23/05/2009 23:39

Hi YM

We are in the same boat, sadly I have not found a practical solution either (ds 4.5 and dd 6 months).

The baby sling was great for a while. But dd is getting heavier and ds is getting stronger. We have been pretty much staying in except preschool, and ds's communication group. But I don't think that's good either from the point of view of my confidence and ds practicing the behaviours I'd like to see.

Can only sympathise!

LeonieSoSleepy · 24/05/2009 08:38

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