Mum of 6yo with asd and adhd ...

[RedCharityBonney]

... anyone else in the same boat?

He's got a younger brother who's very hard work too, though not quite in the same league.

Looking for advice, friends, chat etc. Hope I've come to the right place!

welcome to mn, I'm sure you will find lots of others in similar position. It's a great board.

I have 4 children, my ds1 has dyspraxia, HMS, and social & communication issues.

Welcome! I think there are a lot of mums here in a similar sort of boat . My DS (3) and has ASD. We're starting to think about schools - I will soon ask a lot of questions about mums whose kids are already there

DS1 is 6 next month and has ASD and epilepsy (probably ADHD too though not separately diagnosed. DS2 is 3 and a real handful - he has just been referred - suspected ADHD, maybe Aspergers? Its really hard to tell at this age.

I look forward to chatting

Hi, I have a 6 year old with asd, and suspected adhd.
I have a 4 year old with classic autism, and my 2.5 year old is suspected asd.
Looking forward to chatting too.

J is 7 and has ADHD and autism. Hi!

Hi there! I have 2 DSs, DS2 is 5 1/2 and currently being assessed for possible Aspergers. I've found lots of help and advice here, from reading others' posts and asking a few questions too, so I'm sure you will too!

Hi

Welcome to the board.

I have 3 dc's,DS2 has a dx of asd, speech difficulties and is going to be assessed for adhd (not hold my breath for that appointment, however!!).

Hi, my DS is nearly 9 and has ADHD and autism.

I definitely have come to the right place then... I can see we're all in a similar sort of boat.

sc13, schools are a right minefield ... !

My DS2 has an appointment with DS1's paediatrician next week to start talking adhd, which we so did not want to happen. For a long time we thought he was copying bad habits from big bro, but now I'm pretty sure he's not.

Difficult isn't it?

We're currently ttc, which is clearly madmess, but I would so love a little girl.

xRCB

welcome to mn i have 4 yr old ds with HFA no ADHD but severe sleep problems and delayed speech and atypical speech sounds in statement process at mo and its all hard work but hoping will be worth the fight

good luck with ttc and seek out any sn groups near by that do holiday things or after school as they do therapies for parents as well as children and can learn alot being around like minded people

and of course my main source is here some great people with some great advise

ds1 8 yrs just found out a last after trying for so long he has dispraxia,dislexia,gross delayed motor skills,speech n lang, am now waiting for ds2 6yrs for a referal for test on everything he has speech and lang at the moment and has being under the best team dont think ds3 5 yrs or dd1 2yrs needs refering but will watch out for them ,ist time posted on this site

Thanks bubblagirl, for the tip and the welcome.

Hi missymoo - fellow newbie Hope it all works out for you with th Dx.

Welcome to the board!! I've not been here long myself. but it's lovely here.

I was told by the paed only yesterday tha my 5 yo son has HFA, he's also a very hyperactive little boy who rarely sleeps.

I'm sure you'll get loads of support and good advice here. x

Welcome RedCharityBonney. I provide childcare for a family with 3dc's (aged 3-8) where all 3 boys are on the spectrum at various points.

Do you have any support network to help you out... even if it's just someone who will babysit on occasion to give you a couple of hours off? Sometimes you will feel like you just need to get some time on your own.
Does your partner/the boys father show signs of ASD? There can be a genetic link.

Some coping strategies:
Structure the day as much as possible, so that your boys know what is expected of them throughout the day. Timetable things if it helps.
Try to get out of the home every day, for a walk - taking the boys with you. Boys have tons of energy and it needs releasing... walking/running in the woods, park, can help them release some of that energy. Local walking books (from a local bookshop) will give you suggestions for walks of various lengths. I care for a 4 year old who will walk 6 miles... as long as there is a cafe stop!
Make time for yourself every day, even if it's just for 15 minutes - Mummy Time.
Use blackout blinds in boys bedroom(s), use dimmed lighting from 6pm onwards. Try giving a high carb meal for dinner... glass of warm milk before bed. This can help them produce more Melatonin.

i forgot to ask if your ds has sleep problems as my ds has melatonin to help him settle we tried all the warm milk etc high carb before bed and nothing worked he was given melatonin by paed

also my ds will have days his full of energy but sensory wise will not want to leave the house again sleep related he doesn't like his curtains open or me anywhere near him he just needs to be left alone playing games

so if you have a day that he wants to be left alone and sit in his room dont feel guilty it was hard for me as i felt he should be with me shouldn't be alone but paed reassured me if he needs to be alone let him

we also have small trampoline in his room so he can bounce away again good for sensory and different release of energy we tried this before bed again didnt work

see if there's a diet you could try if you find ds hyperactive at all my friends ds has adhd and has him on special diet that has helped unsure off top of head what it is i want to say gluten free not sure if im right maybe someone else will know i'll ask her when next speak to her but she's on hols now

most of all take time to yourself and remember your doing a great job

Thanks all!
When DS1 was younger I tried him on a gluten-free and casein-free diet, but it made little or no difference really. He takes a good, strong fish oil now, and I think that's been quite useful. Next thing is we'll be talking ritalin with his paed.

I'm not a fan of ritalin, but I'm not scared of it either, and if it might help him then we'll try it.

He sleeps well, thank goodness. His official diagnosis is HFA, but as he gets older he looks a better fit for Asperger's. His receptive and expressive language are better than normal for his age. His grammar and word organisation are odd, as are his speech rhythms, but he certainly gets his point across!

I know what you mean about exercise. We walk them and run them and get them to bounce and climb and goodness knows what else. We get home and DH and I are completely wiped and they're still raring to go!

We have a bouncy castle but worry a bit about all the power it uses. Going to try and find a big enough trampoline for not too much money this summer.

I think I'm going to be very happy here, and get lots of good tips.

Nannynick, you sound like an absolute godsend to that family! Do you have any gaps in your schedule??!!

For me I find that being as near Wheat free as possible helps. For some reason for me it seems that it is wheat that I have trouble processing, rather than gluten - as rice and oats don't cause me issues.

My schedules are all online - see my profile for details. Mind you, you would have to be living near me!