Dd2 will be getting her dx in the next few weeks, feeling weird

[Marne]

We were told a few months ago thet we may have to wait another year for a dx as they didn't want to give her a dx of ASD if she only has AS. Dd2 is 3.2 and almost non-verbal so we kind of expected a dx of HFA.

Today she had the SALT part of her assessment ,at the end of the assessment the SALT said she would write up her report, send it to the others and dd should get her dx in a few weeks .

Now i'm feeling a bit sad as i wasn't expecting it so soon, i suppose i was expecting her speech to improve over the next year and then get a dx of AS or HFA, it seems like now (from what the SALT was saying) we are to expect a dx of ASD but it will be left open to where on the spectrum she is until she's 5.

Her speech is coming along slowly (to me it feels like we are getting nowhere even though she is starting to say a few words), i feel like i have let her down and i could have done more with her/spent more time 1:1 with her.

and a glass of wine

Glad they aren't dragging it out for you, but equally that its a different dx than what you were expecting.

You haven't let her down in any way, so don't beat yourself up about it.

If it help, I felt the same when we were told DS2 had autism. We were told after a paed app 3 days before Christmas 2007 and he was formally dx on 28 Feb 2008. We knew he had it, but were hoping that they were wrong.

You haven't let her down at all Marne.

The dx was all very sudden for us as well - we were expecting it to take ages (multi-agency meetings, etc) but we were given the diagnosis there and then at our first paed appointment.

I think one thing i would say is that getting an ASD dx now compared to a HFA diagnosis in a years time changes nothing. In fact, the services are easier to access. Its only a name - what you need is advice on whats best for your dd and getting a dx earlier than expected may enable you to access the support she needs to develop and flourish.

Just remember the day you get the dx - she's still the same little girl she was the day before

Thank you, feeling a little better now. I have spent the last 6 month moaning about how long it takes to get a dx (dd1's took 1.5 years) and now i'm wishing dd2's would take longer . We already have great access to support for her (SALT,SN nursery, Early birds course etc..) but i know a dx will help us get more help for her at nursery and for when she starts school next year.

Dd1's dx took so long and i was so prepared for the outcome that her dx didn't upset me at all, i knew she has Aspergers from early on. I don't know why i am upset over this as i have been here before with dd1. I think i was just hoping that a dx of HFA or AS would mean i could tell people 'it's not as bad as we first thought'.

She's still my lovely ,bright little girl and i wouldn't change her for the world.