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SN children

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Original poster

Fed up with people thinking because dd is ahead at school she doesn't have special needs/AS.

12 replies

Marne · 30/04/2009 12:52

Do any of you find that people question your DC's special needs because they are bright/ahead at school. I get fed up with people saying there is nothing wrong with dd because she is ahead of her piers at school even though she has a DX of AS.

I am also getting fed up with the school giving her work that she finds to easy, i managed to get her put up a level with reading but she is still clearly reading the wrong level. I don't want to speak to her teacher again as they will think i am being pushy but dd is reading poetry books at home as well as children's stories but only reading level 3 at school which she reads in 5 seconds with no problems.

Sorry ,just needed to rant as i can't speak to anyone in RL as they think i am bragging about dd being clever or being pushy.

OP posts:

ICANDOTHAT · 30/04/2009 13:19

Why are they so against giving her more challenging work ?If they have acknowledged she is 'bright and ahead', surely they should be supporting an appropriate level of learning? Is her teacher any 'good'? I would take an example of what she is reading at home and stuff them thinking you are being pushy ....

allytjd · 30/04/2009 13:26

I have the opposite problem! Because DS2 has problems with reading and writing and is bottom of the class in those subjects some people think he is a bit dense (luckily mostly those obnoxious parents who make a point of knowing what reading book all the children are on), unfortunately everyone in the class's grades were displayed on a note on the wall at the parents' evening this week . Luckily his teacher seems to realise that he is bright and gives him work above his test level to keep him interested.
I'm surprised that your DD isn't given more challenging reading in school, I was an advanced reader and was taken out of class to do extension work and that was thirty years ago! I think some teachers think advanced reading is a form of parental showing off.

It doesn't surprise me that people question your DD's SN, childrens' happiness and enjoyment of school comes further down the list than their academic achievement and behaviour IMO. Most people aren't very observant or analytical when it comes to children's behaviour, especially if they have very NT kids themselves.

I remember taking Siegfried Sasoon's memoirs into school for a book review essay when i was about 13, the teacher must have thought I was very poncetastic!

Speak to the teacher as much as you like, I wish I had been a bit pushier earlier with my two school age boys, as long as you phrase things carefully to avoid sounding critical and don't come up with suggestions that are costly in time and money terms, they rarely mind too much (of course sometimes they just ignore your ideas).

allytjd · 30/04/2009 13:27

I need to practice succint replies

Original poster

Marne · 30/04/2009 13:37

Her teacher is hardly there at the moment as she is training to be a head teacher, i spoke to her last month (at parents evening) she told me dd was her best reader and is above avarage in Maths, i spoke to her about putting her up a level or two on her reading and she agreed put 2 weeks later dd was still reading the same level , i had to write a note to her teacher in dd's book reminding her to review dd's reading level, after another week they have put her up one level, dd brought the next first of level 3 home yesterday and read it in 5 seconds without getting stuck on any words, so i'm thinking maybe the books are still to easy for her?

We have some of the oxford reading tree books at home as i bought her the home pack last summer to read, she can read level 5 at home with no problems and is also reading books that she chooses from the book shelves at school and at home.

She reads twice a week at school but this seems to be with a different teacher/TA each week.

They know she is bright as i often get the head teacher coming up to me and telling me how well she is doing, it just seems that they don't move the children ahead with the reading as fast as some schools.

I'm not sure what level reception should be reading but a lot of dd's friends are on level 1 and 2.

OP posts:

wasuup3000 · 30/04/2009 13:50

Could your daughter be allowed to choose her own library book to bring home each day to extend her? As your daughter has AS then turn taking, group work and sharing reading time together with her peers maybe the benefits she would miss out on if she shot ahead on the ORT. ORT is really boring as well (I am on my 3rd child with it) look out for other book schemes you can use at home with your daughter instead. My son is 4 and being assessed for ASD but has a reading age of a 10 year old. We are a bit stuck with the school accept they allow him to choose his own library books as he is way ahead of most of his peers.

Original poster

Marne · 30/04/2009 13:55

She brings 2 libary books home a week but the school only has a small libary so she often brings home books she has already read. I pick her up books at boot sales and second hand shops which keeps her busy at home. I agree that reading in a group would be good for her, she often reads to her friends.

ORT is boring, each story seems the same and i think dd is getting fed up with reading them, she loves reading poetry and rhymes but i find it hard to find poetry books for children.

OP posts:

coppertop · 01/05/2009 09:48

It's one of those rare times when I'm pleased that ds1 uses extra equipment at school, as it's a physical reminder that even though he's doing very well academically he still needs help with other areas.

Does your dd read at school in the same way that she does at home? I ask because it's always been a bit of an issue with ds2 that he won't always show what he can do, especially if it's something he finds easy. The teacher then assumes that he can't do it and gives him something even easier and it all spirals from there.

tclanger · 01/05/2009 12:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Marne · 01/05/2009 14:15

Coppertop, her teacher says she reads well at school but i'm not sure if its as well as she does at home. When we are out and about she reads everything (signs, food packaging and this morning she was reading the newspaper). My step daughter was the opposite and read well at school but made out she couldn't read at home (to me) so she could drag the book out and get more attention .

OP posts:

ouryve · 01/05/2009 21:06

ORT is boring, each story seems the same and i think dd is getting fed up with reading them

Don't I know it! DS1 is in reception and reading the ORT stage 9 and 10 books and some of them bore him to tears and end up inducing a huge meltdown (and we had a full 3 weeks when he refused to read any - that was fun!) Thankfully, his teachers are pretty fabulous and let him pick and choose a few titles at each level rather than making him read them all. They also gave him some Happy Families books to read over the Easter hols for a change and he loved those.

They're not so good at differentiating his other homework, lately, though. This weekend's is a number line to complete (he could have done that 2 years ago) and some one bigger/one smaller questions to answer, plus several 2/3 letter high frequency words to "learn." The kid corrects MY spelling, ffs! They did give him some slightl more challenging stuff a while back, but that doesn't appear to have been happening, recently.

MUM23ASD · 08/05/2009 23:18

and another anoying thing is that when you have a bright child with SN....that they are expected to be bright in all subjects and activities...

my ds's have what i call 'uneven abilities' some they shine at - some they lag well behind... but school (especially secondary)does not seem to be able to place them in appropriate classes with appropriate support- its like i have to decide, because ds is fab at computers...that he should be top streamed for all subjects... in order to do top level ICT..however in top classes he WILL NOT get TA help...as ALL the TA help is geared towards the lower levels... and timetabling will not allow him to do a mix of abilities ... so result is he has to go 'middling' and work towards the higher level in his own time.

Yurtgirl · 08/05/2009 23:27

Marne - I could have written your post myself

My ds is 7 and in year 2
The school insist that they differentiate work for him.
I disagree but am at a loss as to how to go about persauding them otherwise

Ds is also incredably unhappy because he is so bored at school and behaving badly because of this - school seem to think he is just naughty - he isnt he is expressing himself by trying to kick the headmistress (hoping that she will "throw me out of school")

I had a go at trying to assess what level he is working at today (from a govt document the school sent home) My assessment is that he is working at level 4 (and sometimes 5) in Maths and Science......... (in otherwords above average attainment for an 11yo, ds is only 7!)

Sympathies

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