Please or to access all these features

SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

Had a horrible day

5 replies

flyingmum · 02/04/2009 17:47

Well not ultra horrible with wings but if I post in 'am I being unreasonable...' I'll probablly get flamed and I'm too much of a wimp. So I know its not special needs as such but I need to quiver . . .

Anyway. Picking up DS2 from school (he with diabetes) standing on pavement on driveway (long driveway) and two boys are hairing around playing chase across the pavements into the drive running around. One falls over in the roadway. A few raised eyebrows from parents but no one says anything. No one seems to notice that child A has fallen over so I think we all assume that there is no parent(s) nearby. Then, about 4 feet infront of me, child A (about aged 8 - fairly large) grabs child B (same age - perhaps 7 smaller and weedier) and gets him flat on the back on the floor. Then proceeds to start strangling him. An older boy stops and says 'what are you doing' Child A replies that they are just playing. Older boy walks off. Child A then resumes strangling and is clearly applying pressure. I step in (still no parent saying anything) and say 'I don't think you should be doing that, it's not giving a good imression of the school, where's you mum?' Child A looks absolutely shocked that someone has spoken to him. Anyway. My sprog comes out, we start walking out and I am accosted by Child A's mum. All a bit Ricky Lake - how dare I speak to her child and tell hiim off, he was scared etc, etc. I did try reason, I did try and ask her if I should ignore her son should he be on the receiving end of someone strangling him. Apparantly its just play fighting.

THen (still with me ladies!) I phone my mother who spent all of Saturday when we were out with them making digs at me about DS2s diabetes. I stuck with it because she is diabetic and I think is projecting her guilt (is it genetic) onto me. So I get 'poor thing, its not like you are there to take him to school and pick him up and go in at lunch time and somehow he has to cope'. He's coping fine, so are the school and I WORK (Horrors!). I put the phone down in the end in tears.

I know compared to what many of you are going through (Riven and Amber & Mr Amber - how are you all?) and other 'worst days of my life' (DS1 having a full blown autistic tantrum aged 8 outside of the school gates, being told son 1 has ASD, the crap annual review meetings I've been to,) that it doesn't really figure large but still I'm quivering.

OP posts:
5intheEgg · 02/04/2009 17:51

Hope you're feeling better after getting it off your chest. We all have bad days, and none are any more significant than others, so don't apologise.

As for Ricki Lake, she probably has a PFB

sickofsocalledexperts · 02/04/2009 17:52

You were right to intervene that this woman is doing her son no favours and is clearly a thick idiot. And your mum is doing that classic mum thing of guilt-tripping you - ignore her, it's not you being the bad mum to your children, it's her to hers!

Big hugs!

lingle · 02/04/2009 18:00

am really impressed you stepped in - so important.

TinySocks · 02/04/2009 18:06

Wonderful! Someone with guts out there. People are so scared of intervening these days, which is a shame.
I think you did the right thing.

flyingmum · 02/04/2009 18:07

I did ask the mother whether I should ignore it if her son was on the floor with another boy's hands around HIS neck. Unfortunatley she was too incensed to compute that - apparantly it's just 'rough play'.

I will say in the boy's defence that I am a secondary teacher and used to bellowing at 6.ft tall lads in playgrounds so I probablly 'projected' a little more than he was expecting from someone who is a mum .

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page