Well the appointment is over and..........

[bear73]

the Paed totally and utterly agreed with everything we thought.

We were in there for nearly 2 hours and he was very thorough with me and with dd. Went right over her life right from birth and concluded that she was High Functioning ASD.

I don't really know how I feel, relieved that after all these years (dd is 6) someone agrees wholeheartedly with me and sad that what I thought is true.

I'm not sure what happens from here. Paed said he would send a letter to my GP and is also sending a form off to the Advisory Service so they can send a specialist teacher into school to teach them how to deal with dd.

He wants to see us ugain in June for a follow up but is not sending us to see anyone else. He already has lots of info from our OT who dd has been seeing for over 2 years fo her SPD, Dyspraxia and Hypermobility.

So is that it? Does that constitute a formal DX? My neighbour who has an autistic son who saw the same Paed says it is because of her age she is old enough for them to see everything clearly. It usually takes much longer if the child is too young.

I will admit that it was so obvious what her issues were. Non-stop talking and asking questions while we were there (in her very grown up manner), walking around on tiptoes, going on and on about her lastest obsession. She kept butting our conversation adding her bits and pieces about liking her room all ordered and how she doesn't play games etc etc. I suppose it was glaringly obvious.

I had also supplied him with 7 pages of info prior to the appt! So he had a lot to go on.

What happens now? I've no idea but I feel like a little cry

bear
x

That does sound like a formal DX. Sounds like the main change in what's happening is roping in the Advisory Service, given she's already having other issues dealt with by OT.

Not surprising you feel wobbly - even if you expect a DX, it's still a shock to the system. be kind to yourself.

aaawww Bear- have a good cry, sometimes it good to let it out, dont bottle. i suspect its as much a relief to finally get a dx. the positives are very good for your dd, she'll get extra help with the specialist teacher. i have no idea what happens now for your family, i am still waiting for the autism specialists appointment for my dd4, (will take 2.5 years), but i just wanted to post some support for you.hope things move much quicker for you now and that good things happen xxx

I think a good cry and a cup of something is definitely called for. Yup, that's a definite diagnosis, I'd say.
I'd get in contact with the local autism charity (www.nas.org.uk National Autistic Society will point you in the right direction for this) and ask their adviceline about anything you need to know in your local area. Support groups, social skills groups, services available, leaflets on what happens next, etc?

And the school SENCO should be a help too, if they have a good one?

bear

((((((bear)))))))). That does sound like a formal dx to me as well.

Cry first then be proactive in making sure that your DD's educational needs in particular are fully met.

When you are ready I would seriously consider applying to the LEA for a Statement for your DD. This document is legally binding (unlike other plans like School Action plus which can be very limited) and may well help her with regards to her schooling.

You don't need school's permission to apply for such a document and parents are better off applying themselves for a Statement in any case. They have far more rights than school do (school cannot appeal if the LEA say no but parents can).

I note paed has mentioned your DD seeing a Specialist teacher however, in this area at least they usually only see the children who are already statemented. Hence the above counsel.

You are your child's best and only advocate.

IPSEA are very good with the whole side of statementing:-

www.ipsea.org.uk

It's good that you've had it confirmed now.

Hi Bear

I'm sorry to hear your news. I know you must be feeling a mixture of relief and fear after waiting to speak to someone about this.

I'm in the same position with my son who is 6 and is due to see a doctor later this month. You want someone to help you understand what is going on but any 'label' will inevitably be a shock.

I don't know anything about what happens from now but I think you can try and view the process positively as the first step in ensuring your daughter has all the help she needs. Well done for getting this far!

Thank you all so much for your kind words. It hasn't had much time to sink in as I was home for about an hour then back at school to help with a school trip! Then straight to dd's art club so I didn't have my cry and am finally sitting down while dd watches dancing on ice on Sky+ :-)

Not once did the Paed mention a statement and I forgot to mention it myself. He mentioned the Advisory Service will contact the school to give advice but I don't think he meant she was getting her own sepcialist teacher - not sure really.

Statementing really worries me as I don't understand much about it (apart from it's a long drawn out nightmare). So many people tell me to get a statement, particularly to help in secondary school but as dd isn't having many problems at school now and is flying academically what basis do I have for a statement? The fact she may struggle in the future? To prevent further issues like at the start of last term?

She is on school action plus but in year 1 she has received no extra help, we have an IEP and that's it. The teacher says she is doing fine and exceeding in most areas so no need for extra help or her own teacher.

If anyone has advice re a statement then that would be great. Is just having the DX enough to get one or does she need to be having issues to warrant one? I understand it gets reviewed yearly and can be taken away.

Not idea what to do now. I suppose I should talk to her teacher and maybe contact some of the organisations mentioned above.

Feel a bit out of my depth and strange because at present she is coping well and just seems like any other little girl (until the next time she pokes a pencil in someones head to get their attention).

Thank you everyone. I suspect I will be hovering around here a bit more now.

Maybe I will have a cry and a glass of wine later.

bear
x

Bear

Sending a hug to go along with that cry and glass of wine.

Thanks HelensMelons (great name )

Has my cry but not my wine.

Once again if anyone can offer advice re statementing and whether I would be wasting my time (see above post) please lert me know.

Thanks again all.

I have a feeling you lot are going to keep me sane

bear
x

My personal thoughts are that if she's making brilliant progress right now and the school and she and you are happy, no need to rush straight into asking for a statement. But it's very handy when things start to go wrong or if she's not making progress at the rate she should for her intelligence level. As she gets older, she may struggle more with the social side of things and the sensory side in bigger and more intense classroom situations, so that'll be when it's useful to have something in place. Opinions may vary, of course.

Thanks amber.

Obviously it would be a nice to have and very handy if things do suddenly get harder for her but things have to be going wrong to get one don't they? Then that can take age to get in place plus they will be reviewed and possibly taken away if felt they aren't necessary any more.

It's all such a minefield. I agree she doesn't need one now but that's not to say she might not next year or in Juniors.

Am told by another mum who had to get a statement for her son that the school will fight me all the way on a statement - they are very unhelpful apparently. Her son was having terrible problems, very violent and disruptive but they still wouldn't accept he needed one to one help (all down money and funding). he is at a special school now because her relationship with the school became so bad. It's a great school, outstanding ofsted but is very middle class and not so keen on the ones that are trouble or don't achieve .

Happy days!

bear
x

Having had to move son to a different school more than once, I can definitely understand the frustrations for that parent and indeed the ds too.