should I tell a friend my concerns over her DS

[lorisparkle]

My DS1 has grown up with her DS (they are both 2yrs 8mnths) and I had a niggling worry that her DS maybe autistic since he was 15 months or so. i have always decided though that it is just because i work with children with asd and am seeing things that are normal in a toddler but also common in children with asd or that it is because he has had limited social experience and mum is quite anxious/shy. well today one of the other mums at baby and toddlers who is a qualified teacher asked me if i thought this little boy was autistic as she thought he was.

so what do i do? should i say something to her and if so what do I say?

thanks for your help

lori

don't say anything at all about his development unless asked; if asked, don't go suggesting ASD - mention gently but honestly specific things that concern you - ?speech? behaviour and suggest she looks for a chat to GP/HV and for onward referral to get things checked out.

Twice I have thought the same about a very young child. On both occasions I was wrong (but failed to spot another child who did have Aspergers).

It's a difficult one. It really depends on what sort of person she is and your are.

If I were in your shoes, I would definitely tell her something. If there is a problem the sooner she gets help the better.

When I had doubts about my DS, everyone was trying to be nice telling me he is fine. My sister was the only one who was upfront with me and told me what she really thought.
I felt upset at the beginning, but now I am so grateful for her honesty.

Thanks everyone. I think the next time we are chatting about speech (we often do as my DS1 has a language delay) and my friend shows some concern about her DS's speech I will tell her about how I got DS1 referred to a speech and language therapist and then she can do the same if she wants.