Really worried about DS's very short attention span and concentration. Please help me with ideas?

[TinySocks]

DS is 4.1 years old and is delayed in all areas (due to brain injury). He has extremely slow processing of spoken language. Very delayed receptive and expressive language.

I am extremely worried about his very short attention span. He spends on average 2 to 3 minutes on tasks initiated both by him or an adult. He will move from one thing to the next without completing things and needs plenty of encouragement to do something.

He is always moving, fidgeting, for example, if we sit to read a book he will look at the book and seemingly pay attention but if I ask him a simple question it becomes clear that he has not really taken the information in. He is constantly touching his clothing, legs, moving.

I think he is a boy with lots of potential but his lack of attention and concentration is really holding him back.

I know there is no magic solution, but could some of you please share with me ideas on how to help him? Those of you who have children with short attention span, what sort of coping strategies do they implement in school?

Thank you

Tinysocks One thing I made the mistake of doing when my ds was dx was constantly sitting him down at a table trying to get him to do 'stuff' - he clicked straight away that I was behaving differently and made a real effort not to co-operate. Remember, they are not stupid and your stress, worry and frustration goes straight onto their shoulders (so to speak), even if you think you are being really subtle. The moment I backed off and didn't put him under pressure to 'perform' he came to me.

Hi ICANDOTHAT. I wish I could just stop trying to make him do things and just be his mum.
I have known about DS's problem since he was 12 months old, and I have worked with him almost everyday since then doing all sorts. I don't regret it because I know that it has made a huge difference. But I think I've reached my limit now, I wish I could just trust that he is getting enough therapy so that I could back off.

If I don't do something with him I am filled with guilt feeling that I am letting him down. I know it is crazy, just cannot help myself.

Hi Tiny, (this is my first post so hello everyone!)my DS is 4.6 and has a severe speech disorder and dyspraxia and his concentration is pretty bad too which I feel inhibits his learning a lot. He has been on a timer at nursery but we have also done some homework on attention and listening (from SALT) like shopping game (put out 6 items and I ask for 2 (he has to remember what I ask for and try not to lose focus half way across the room!, build up to 3 then supposedly 4) and we have modified it to make it a car showroom which is his fav thing - e.g. I would like to test drive the fiat, the porsche and the VW. In some ways he has improved but in others (eg jigsaws which he could do at 2.5 he now doesn't have the attention span to get half way) he has gone back so I know how frustrating it is. I'm hoping for improvement with age too!

Hi crispapple. Thank you so much for your response. I also feel DS's concentration is holding back his learning.

We also play the shopping game, the SALT adviced that we show him pictures first and then send him to pick up the items. We are trying 3 items at the moment, he only remembers 2. We are also trying a tea party game, where a guest asks for three things to eat and he has to remember them.

He seems to be okay with visual memory, but auditory memory is very difficult. I guess I'll just have to keep at it! I am just starting to get frustrated.

Tiny, I know where you are coming from. I find it very difficult to work with DD. When I say that she will concentrate for 25 mins, that is NOT with me but with the SALT. In fact, DD's opthalmologist has started sending me out of the room when she examines DD on the grounds that DD behaves better alone. DD also has a sixth sense for when I'm trying to work with her and will either tune out completely or demand smarties (when I get desperate to make her concentrate she gets smarties). I'm finding it really difficult at the moment as I'm not only trying to work with DD, but I have DS who is just 19 mos and I'm still not certain that he's NT so I'm trying to work as much as possible with him as well. All just adds up to a big guilt trip all round!
DD is hopeless with all memory games. Can't even be induced to play "pairs"!

Hi Brio. Sorry you are going through a similar thing. Being a bit selfish here, it feels a little better to know that I am not alone.

I think you are absolutely right, they work better without parents around. I just played the three animal sound game AND HE GOT THEM ALL THREE. I was so happy, so I pushed my luck and played the shopping game. And no, he decided he couldn't remember the 3 items. My gut feeling is that if he really tried he could do it, he just cannot be bothered. It's all about finding the right motivation which is so hard. It is such hard work all this!!! I'd rather go back to manage projects to be honest.