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i need really big hugs feeling down at the moment

38 replies

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 14:01

i am so so so tired its unbelievable

my ds was up from 8am to 2.30 am and i am struggling dp has been called away fro week for work he got phone call last night had top go this morning and im so tired

cant seem to regulate my ds sleep at all im trying herbal sleeping stuff at the moment can safely say it didn't work last night and i upped the dose

he keeps shouting at me to be quiet and go away then moaning to get me back then wont look at me or talk to me and i leave he starts again

he is tucked up in his room but he wont be using any energy to ware himself out for tonight can only hope his that tired that he sleeps early this has been going on for months now

just needing to rant really as i am so good every day dealing with it last ni9ght i snapped at my ds dp then had a go at me and said he doubts that will work but i as at the end of my tether i was so tired i didnt mean too but i really cant cope all the time everyone thinks im great and dp thinks im wander woman but i cant cope all the time im tired its hard work RANT over thank you i can admit on here that i struggle

today i just want to cry ive not got dressed i have showered but clean pj's on i have no energy ds has been in his room for hours i miss him when his in there but know its for the best dp away for the week and i just want to lay down and cry myself to sleep

ds is an angel as long as he sleeps and is well this not sleeping is changing my pleasant boy to really hard work x

OP posts:
tiredoftherain · 16/02/2009 14:08

you poor thing. Everything seems so much worse when you're tired. If he's safe in his room then shut your curtains and try and get a nap in yourself. Or get yourself a cup of tea and a magazine and just relax.

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 14:17

i'll try im just so tired and he went from being so calm with no real problems apart from constant waking and some frustration

to now not sleeping very sensitive to sound etc and its really hard work i guess i was lucky that his asd symptoms were not so bad but now its so obvious and im struggling again took me ages to learn his behavior last time so now feel lost as i dont know what to do i have to re learn it all again

i shall try AND relax watching day time tv lol but hate feeling so lazy i dont help myself sometimes

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notfromaroundhere · 16/02/2009 14:27

Sorry you are having a rough time of it atm - sleep deprivation is harsh. No advice I just hope you both get some decent sleep very soon.

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 14:36

thank you so much

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Tclanger · 16/02/2009 14:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

theteacherspet · 16/02/2009 14:47

It must be so hard
Do you have [or want]a social worker - sometimes they can organise an overnight respite - sometimes with a family link family
which would allow you to catch up with some sleep. Some of the child I teach I have it and really enjoy it. The families build up good relationships too. But I know its not for everyone

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 14:50

ive spoken to gp and wont give anyhting for sleep have to wait for review ans speak to sn team

on a good note just this minute had a phone call from education board and they have awarded little man a statement not sure of the exact details yet but relieved something is in place before he starts school

bubblaboy just came out to do some coloring with me for 10 minutes and then said he was finished we had big kisses and cuddles and few tiggle and his happily gone off to his room

we are in middle of re doing his room at moment so cant do the bed thing until decorated and new bed in place

as we will have few days he will have to stay in with us as his little friend is having old bed and we will have midsleeper in place with new decor everything all will be decluttered and have trampoline coming to go in there too so with any luck with all of this he will settle and stay

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Deeeja · 16/02/2009 16:40

Hi Bubblagirl. Sorry to hear you are having a hard time of things, I have two with sleep problems and they have just been put on melatonin, it seems to work for some people, it is early days for me.
My 3 year old ds has been going through some changes lately and has become much more aggressive. He seems to be experimenting with what happens when he throws objects at other children, and then he stands there watching them cry. I have got some pecs to help with this new more challenging behaviour from the salt at his school ( who is now leaving, she was a marvel) and, although he doesn't like it, he understands them very well. I also have some for 'bed-time' etc, I find that pecs work very well for my ds.
Glad you got a statement for your ds. Get in touch with the NAS to check it over with you, and also SOS:SEN, both were very helpful to me.
Best of luck.
Nice to see you back, I was thinking of you yesterday and wondering how you and your sweet little ds were.
Take care.

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 16:51

oh thank you i have been here but been so tired haven't had the energy to join it just reading and keeping ,my distance thank you for thinking of us

been feeling so lonely just lately its nice to know someone thinks of us lol

my doctor wouldn't give melatonin she said i could buy it but she wont prescribe it as she doesn't feel enough research been done on it

where do you buy yours from most pharmacies Ive asked don't have it

its just awful as she said to wake him 7.am every day no matter what time he goes to sleep but ive got a cranky child throwing tantrums all day sitting in his room all day doing nothing and then not sleeping again at night

we cant go out its so frustrating im hoping tonight he will be so tired he'll go to sleep early but i would like that every night as he'll have full energy tomorrow and will probably be up amm night again lol and then the cycle starts again lol

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bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 16:52

sorry for typos im terrible without being so sleep deprived worse when i am lol

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Deeeja · 16/02/2009 17:15

Ahh, I don't even notice typos lol

Try to get an emergency appointment with your ds consultant paediatrician/psychologist, they may be more willing to prescribe melatonin.
I find my gp very unhelpful, and he does not really understand autism at all.(He thinks kids just outgrow autism [hmmm])
Can you get a referral to CAMHS. I find them very helpful in my area.
I get malatonin from consultant psych who sees both my sons.
I wouldn't wake him at 7am either, he needs all the sleep he can get, poor little guy.

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 17:29

i have been waking him at 7.30-8 to try and get him used to getting up for pre school as we were missing to many days and the later he slept the later he was sleeping

my gp is great but maybe just not on autism she has requested our review again as should have been in dec but never heard from them at all

i'll speak to them and see if they would prescribe it he needs something bless him so we can go about our days again instead of him struggling and me struggling

thanks deeja

the thing is this is still relatively new to me as never had this problem with ds before and its only been 9 mths since dx so im still learning on the ways to go about things who to see etc i tend to plod along nopt knowing much

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BriocheDoree · 16/02/2009 18:54

Does he like being enclosed? DD has a tent on her bed which she LOVES.
also, because I had a down kind of day too! (Only 'cause I had to see one of the people who supervises DD's treatment and I don't trust him, don't have a good feeling about him and can't quite put my finger on why not, nor fully disguise the fact when I'm talking to him!!)

bubblagirl · 16/02/2009 19:09

oh poor you brioche im sorry to hear that i hate that uneasy feeling and not knowing why

well tonight i have resorted to medised to see if it could make a difference as herbal stuff not working just need him to fall asleep before midnight so i can sleep then tomorrow i can function better

spent days clearing his room ebaying and soooo much stuff gone on free cycle huge clear out poor mite wont have anything left lol

im trying to get his room done until with less than 24 hr notice dp got called away for work he'll be away a week so now ds room wont get painted or done i want it finished so i can start the sleep in your own room =thing

he doesn't seem to like being enclosed think he gets that from me

im hoping clutter free tidy gorgeous car themed room will be enough to have him settle lol how neieve [sp?] i am lol

im at my wits end ive tried massage ive tried everything his brain still wont shut off maybe the trampoline when that turns up will do the trick

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5inthebed · 16/02/2009 21:44

So sorry you've had a tiresome few days. Hope the medised at least gives you a good nights sleep. Nothing worse than sleep deprivation. I've had it on and off for the past 8 weeks, but starting to settle down now.

Fingers crossed he sleeps well for you tonight.

Tclanger · 16/02/2009 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

amber32002 · 17/02/2009 06:20

Other thoughts - a heavier duvet. Sometimes we sleep much better under something heavy and enclosing (if safe and not too hot, of course). Very, very high quality bedding and nightwear that's non-scratchy and has no irritating seams or labels (I shop for sale bargains). Because our brains can't switch off from something uncomfortable, it can mean we're awake for hours because we just can't get comfy enough to sleep. And we're bad at letting others know what the problem is.

bubblagirl · 17/02/2009 08:23

hi thanks guys i put him in my bed and he had a good nights sleep so im feeling much better today yet nervous for tonight lol

at least he may be up and about today as he'll have the energy and i hope paed gives us something too just to get that body clock working the right way round his all back to front and its not good with every day life as i cant get out and do the most simple of things

will keep you informed thanks again xx

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TotalChaos · 17/02/2009 08:33

hope you have a better day, sorry you are going through the sleep stuff. I had a period where DS was exactly the same, it was a nightmare, I never really cracked it, it was more that things changed - he was much happier at his new nursery. it's possible to get melatonin on ebay btw, but I've never done it, so can't recommend anyone reputable.

Woooozle100 · 17/02/2009 09:53

just seen this - haven't got a fat lot to add. Paed should give you melatonin if gp won't (my mate had this prob)

Hope things get better for you soon. Glad you had a better night. Wishing you all the best x

TinySocks · 17/02/2009 10:41

bubblagirl, sorry to hear you are having a hard time. Tiredness is without a doubt one of the worst things DH and I have had to endure with DS1 (4yrs GDD). (we have tried a white noise machine with some success).
The worst thing is that the more tired DS is the more hyper he gets! Exhausting.
No words of wisdom, just sending you some virtual support.

bubblagirl · 17/02/2009 11:26

thank you very much
well managed to get into town he had to have his little sp games console but we managed it now his complaining of being tired so is laying on his bed witching scooby doo

but so far so good with his behavior ive seen melotonin on line but will wait till i speak to paed and may just give one shot of medised tonight again and hope it tires him slightly wont make a habit but im still so tired feel worse i think for sleeping in till 8 this morning my body wanted more sleep

thanks for all your kind words no one here in rl understands what im going through so feels bit lonely at the moment

i gets tories of how there child wouldnt sleep etc but really they only wne to bed hour later than normal n ot up all bloody night for the last 2 mths lol

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RaggedRobin · 17/02/2009 21:48

aww poor bubbla and bubbla boy, you must both be knackered. ds has always been a bad sleeper so he sleeps with me (and baby sister!) every night. poor dp!!

we've been cutting out gluten with ds and find him to be much calmer. could there be anything in bubbla boy's diet that is keeping him buzzing?

i hate that feeling of dread when you are so tired but you know it's going to be another bad night. hope things improve!

bubblagirl · 18/02/2009 08:57

thank you ragged

to be honest bubbla boy eats really well varied diet so not entirely sure ha has good combination of fruit and veg some precessed meals if need to cook quick but not alot of sweets etc he will have a treat if behaved well in get him chocolate animals from Thornton but he only eats one

well last night i got him to sleep early he had medised as so full of cold so thats not helping his mood either at the moment but he was asleep by 8 thought id never see that day again lol

had the usual wakings but easily settled

so i went and continued decorating his room completely shattered myself as dp been told he'll be away longer now and room need to be complete for monday when new bed arrives aarrrggghhh

so anyway sleeping soundly and wake uo to him climbing out of bed this morning at 4 am no getting him to sleep again he was awake and thats all there was to it

so im tired still have a bed to collapse today as his friend is having his old bed need to walk into town to get more paint need to get rest of room packed away and painted and furniture shifted so much to do for one person so can only hope tonight he sleeps soundly will aim for about 8-9 o'clock sleep encase he gets up at 4 again

well let shope his room looks good when im done i said dp will come ho,me and ask what the hell ive done in there lol

he will have to paint the ceiling at some point though we have really high ceilings and i dont like heights so my cutting in is quite sloppy he he

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TotalChaos · 18/02/2009 09:29

oh dear sympathies for the 4 a.m. waking - maybe he only needs 7 hours sleep at the moment? sorry I'm no use at advice on this, despite having been through it, as I feel nothing I did cracked it iyswim. one thing that has helped is having an outside person involved with his bedtime routine - (we have a friendly local teen who comes round a lot).

good luck with the painting!