Is it SN or just bad behaviour?? When do you discipline?

[mumgoingcrazy]

I'm really not sure what to do. DD2 is 19 months. She has been going through a clingy phase for a while now, but recently she has started tugging on my trouser leg and crying/screaming until I pick her up for a cuddle. Quite often when I do she then laughs as if to say 'ha ha gotcha again'. We have been working so hard on improving her interaction and social skills and this is the first time I actually know what she wants, she's quite clearly telling me.

Do I reward her for interacting with me, or ignore this as what I would class as manipulative behaviour (as I would have done with DD1)?

I find I let DD2 get away with so much more than I ever did with DD1 (NT) as my first instinct is if she's upset it's because of sensory overload.

I also don't think it's fair on DD1 as I think it must be obvious that I treat them differently. DD2 gets away with more than DD1 but I can't seem to help it, even though I'm aware of it. (DD1 hasn't said anything by the way, this is what I think).

Does anyone else struggle with discipline and the differences between NT and SN siblings?

treating them equally doesnt mean treating them the same.

DS1 being ADHD, I have to be very specific and very blunt - almost offensive.

DS2 (11y) is extremely sensitive and feels incredibly guilty over everything, so he just gets a mild explanation of his wrong doings.

DS3 (10y) knows exactly what hes doing and when, and needs a firm "stop that!" when hes up to no good.

DS4 (4y)needs to be picked up and removed otherwise its a slippery slope to full meltdown.

DS5 (3y) is ?autistic with GDD and a short attention span, I just distract him.

I like to think i treat all my children equally, but the way its done needs to be different because they are all different.

That's a very good point and you are right, I just find I feel guilty about absolutely everything.

misscutandstick, would you reward the interaction and give in, or treat her behaviour as 'winding mummy round my little finger'?