Is it strange to think I might miss DD's SN if they were to magically disappear?

[SunshinePine]

So yes it would mean a lot less things for me to have to worry about, but in a way it might seem as if we've lost a little part of DD.

Just a strange thought, wondered if anyone else felt the same.

Yes, you're normal!

I feel the same about my sight problems. I'd love to be able to drive, to be able to see things far up in the sky etc but all the trials and stresses I've gone through with school, college and now uni, are what makes me, me. My friend H has CP and she's the same. It is like a part of you.

No, I don't think it's strange at all. People often say to me "Oh don't you wish that your ASD would disappear" but I don't. It's me. It's who I am.

I see what you mean, but I would NOT miss DS's SN if they were to magically disappear. Not for a minute.
I don't see his SN as part of who he is.
Yes if I could ask for a miracle it would be that my little boy would be NT and have all the opportunities that his brother will.

I know what you mean - but it would be so much better for DS if he could speak and understand language on the same level as his peers.

I wouldn't miss the epielpsy or the CP! I wish so much dd could speak and move.
And my own disabiliites. In my head I'm still a cyclist when the sad fact is I haven't been able to cycle since March and now have to use a wheelchair more and more. In my head I'm still able to walk 5 miles. If the MS vanished tomorrow I wouldn't miss it one jot.

There's things I wish I could do that others can't, but I wouldn't want to wake up and find myself NT. I could really do with being able to fold sheets, ride a bike, swim, recognise people, Not Say Undiplomatic Things . But I'd miss loads of other things.

I would get rid of J's autism and ADHD in a second. I love him but autism gets in the way of who he is, actually.

I have to say I wish dd's epilepsy and inability to walk would go away, just so she could participate more with other children. We love her to bits, and try to do loads of stuff to keep her amused and make her realise how loved she is, but her issues mean she has no real friends to play with Which breaks my heart.

I wouldn't change DS2 for all the chocolate made by Green & Black's. Would being able to communicate like his brother alter him? Yes, I imagine so - a lot of his character must have been forged by not being able to talk/understand.

When I see younger children having normal conversations, I still feel sad for us but then, I remember how lucky we are. All the tests we have had have come back negative i.e. clear but made me see all the problems some parents face.

Life would have been different without DS's problems but I'd rather have him and his difficulties than not. So, yes I have thought about this, too .

Difficult one. On the one hand, my dds would not be who they are without their SN, on the other, there is little doubt that their lives would be so much easier without the ADD/ADHD and its attendant issues.
I love them with every fibre of my being, regardless of the SN.

i agree with a few different sentiments already on here.

I absolutely love every ounce of my SN DC's, just as much (if not more if im being honest!) as my NT DC's, but it would be better for them if they found everyday life just as 'easy' as their peers, and not stuggle with even the simplest of concepts like speech and 'other people'!

I just wish dd could use her hands and speak. Being trapped in an immobile body is shit really.

in answer to the op.
if dd didn't have cp then she wouldn't be dd.

I have learnt so much about SPD thanks to DD2. I've also met some amazing friends and now trained to become a Portage worker. I wouldn't have done any of this if it wasn't for her sn's. I worry about her future, more than anything I want her to just 'fit in' but she is extra special and love every bit of her.

Same as 2shoes - if my ds's problems magically disappeared, then so would he

poof!

pheasentplucker your poor dd. where are you in the country? are you near essex?. i have a dd (aged 7)who finds making friends really difficult as she is very shy and about 2 years behind her peers in speech and understanding ( as well as having epilepsy and Cf) and like you it breaks my heart to see her so lonely. I try like you to make sure she knows she is loved.

julier thanks for your post, no we are not near Essex (SW London) otherwise I would have loved our children to meet!

I adore my dd, I hope no-one misunderstands me and thinks I want her changed, I just mean that I wish things were differet to make her life that bit easier and less isolating for her. Even her SALT said a few days ago that she was 'inspirational' for her feisty spirit and love of life, and it made me very proud!! x

The whole family would be completely different. Undoubtedly ds1 would find everything easier but I think his special needs have made us work closer as a family. Plus I am a different (and better I hope) person - I am far more capable and confident than before I had children. Maybe that would have happened to a certain extent anyway but I think a lot of it is dealing with SN and school etc. I think my other kids are more considerate for it too.