Worried about my nephew (9 years) - please help!

[AnxiousAunty]

I am really worried about my nephew. He is a very kind loving boy, but I think he has behavioural issues. He is always biting his school ties and my SIL buys a new one every month! He is rather obsessed with machinery - he loves washing machines, clocks and fans. He speaks so fast he almost trips over his words and he often repeats whole chunks of adult conversation right down to the last word. I know my SIL is concerned for him (my brother doesnt think there is a problem), she says he doesnt really fit in at school and is often easily lead astray (my dd goes to the same school and says everyone thinks he behaves oddly - apparently he is always pulling his trousers down in the playground!) His school has talked about statementing him because he is struggling with his work and they think he would work better in an intimate setting, but they haven't said anything to my SIL about his behaviour!. What do you think and what should I do. My mum and I really want to help, but not sure what to suggest.

Tbh the first thing that came to mind was Aspergers. I'm surprised that the school are considering statementing without actually talking to your nephew's parents about the staff's concerns.

Actually - I'm not sure the school have picked up on my dn's behaviour probs. SIL just keeps talking about how they think he might be dyslexic etc.

I haven't told my SIL that dd says dn keeps pulling his trousers down (I asked dd if the teachers have noticed and she says not)

Do you mind me asking whether this screams Aspergers at you? And which parts of his behaviour link with Aspergers. I dont know much about this, but have always thought it strange that dn was so interested in mechanical objects. When he was little he wanted to make washing machines, dishwashers and toilets during the junk modelling session at nursery - whilst all his friends made rockets etc...

The bits that made me think AS were:

• repeating chunks of conversation word-for-word. Lots of children with AS are known for repeating entire chunks of film/TV scripts in the same way.

• Biting at his tie. If you search for MrsForgetful's posts (now Mrs Frostgetful) you'll find loads of references to her boys eating their sleeves etc.

• Obsession with machinery (especially washing machines)

• speaking very quickly and stumbling over words.

• pulling trousers down. May be because he doesn't 'get' social conventions and so doesn't know this is wrong or it may be that he is easily manipulated by others into doing this. Jaysmum mentioned something similar very recently.

I think there's a list of AS symptoms on the NAS (National Autistic Society) website. I think its at www.nas.org.uk but I'm not 100% sure. It should be easy to find by google though.

I would say AS too by what you have said

your sil needs to take him to gp and insists on a refferal to paediatrician.

Many Thanks everyone. I've just looked at the site for Aspergers and I agree that it does seem very likely. I'm not quite sure how I am going to bring this up with SIL (I think I will direct her to this site, so thanks everyone) Tiffini, I will definitely suggest a visit to the GP.

Can anyone direct me to the threads about MrsForgetful/Frostgetful's children chewing their sleeves? I've looked for it in the archived threads but cant find it

Not sure about those threads but there was a recent one here .

More related to dyspraxia than Asperger's but I think it is a sensory thing which could be associated with either.

My first thought was AS too. Anxiousaunty, can you speak to someone at school to prompt them to deal with it?
T-shirt (and other clothes/back of hand etc) chewing is a common behaviour in ASD.