Feeling sad - I think ds's drumming teacher is building up to asking us to leave :-(

[dustystar]

I could be wrong and I am feeling hormonal atm but I'm usually very good at reading people.

DS has been going to him for about 18 months now and I've been really happy with things. Sadly his teacher has had to move back into his family home though and this has meant changes. Sadly for us this has resulted in ds losing his regular 1/2 slot to make way for one of the whole hour students All his teacher has room for is a 1/2 hour every other week on a tues or every week but at 6 on a fri which would be a recipe for disaster after a full week at school.

When we spoke yesterday he commented on being concerned about ds potential to damage things - he never really has while at drumming but I can't ever guarentee that it wouldn't happen. He didn't say he didn't want ds there anymore so maybe I'm being paranoid but I don't think so. I think he's just too nice and finds it difficult to say it. I felt reallt sad and angry yesterday that not only had we lost our regular slot but that it seemed like ds was no longer welcome

I had a talk with ds about the importance of not touching things in this house and he behaved really well today while he was there and his teacher was all smiley as usual but when we left ds told me that his teacher had siad that if ds doesn't stop getting cross in thelesson that he won't teach him anymore

If he is asked to leave he will be heartbroken and worst of all he will know its to do with his behaviour so he will be furious with himself so will most likely rage and self harm. I can't bear to see him so hurt again. Hopefully I am wrong but if not we are going to have weeks of agitated and unpredicatble behaviour.

Oh Dusty, that sounds heartbreaking . Poor DS. I do hope you are wrong xx

Is there another drumming teacher locally - perhaps you could look for one and transition away - this way you can tell him it is beacusde he is so good at drumming he needs a new teacher? Just a thought.

Dh suggested that when i spoke to him. I'll have to start looking around. Its so hard to find the right poeple to work with him though I know this problem seems like nothing compared to what other parents have to deal with with their children's sn but for me its yet another problem to have to deal with and it makes me sad for ds.

oh dear. is there any way the drum teacher could come to your house instead? or do you think that he'll be too busy?

Definitely too busy sadly He is booked solid each evening.

Could you speak to the drum teacher and pre-empt him a bit - maybe ask him not to make any comments like that to Ds, and then even if he does want him to stop, you can tell Ds that it's a Christmas break whilst looking for a new teacher to transition him to.

Is there a sn drumming/percussion group you could go to instead?

I might try that when I'm not feeling so hormonal saker, If i do it now I will become a blubbering gibbering wreck

I'm not sure ds would cope with a group setting tbh as he finds it hard enough tio stay calm and focussed on a 1:1. Its worth looking at though.

Poor ds.

Fingers crossed for you both that it turns out okay. xx

it sounds like a tall order, but perhaps a local music therapist who specialises in drumming? perhaps you could use this site to enquire?

music therapy