Help needed for a just statemented ASD

[crace]

I can't get into specifics but my son (12 yo, just started secondary) has just been referred to social services for a safety issue on the way to school today (for some reason didn't get on his bus and started walking to school). This on top of him on a reduced timetable and excluded for swearing I have had enough. We are trying to get him placed in a special needs school but there isn't availability and every school we are trying takes ages to get back to us and refuse.

Now this is a safety issue and I now have social services to deal with, I frankly want him home. I don't see the point of sending him in.

I know this is illegal but surely this is daft to keep sending him in?! What can I do?? Can I force the LEA to let him stay home until a place can be found. This is just ridiculous. We have two other children at home and I am not coping. I would rather him be home but it appears I am already in trouble (?!) and don't want to make this worse.

Help?

could the social work help get him a taxi to and from school? unsure of how it works, but i know of someone who had it arranged because she wasnt getting her little one to school(was a neglect issue ,not SN )hope u get this sorted out.

crace

I would call IPSEA www.ipsea.org.uk or the NAS at the very least. Either of these organisations have likely come across this sort of scenario before.

Am sorry to read you're going through all this.

Poor you sounds like you are getting one thing after another with your DS at the moment is there no help in your area to have an escort or some help in getting him to school to make sure he arrives safely, i really don't know how it works when statemented children reach senior school as my SN DD is only in infant school, but sounds like you could really do with a break and some more help my heart goes out to you I know it is hard to cope sometimes, talking on mumsnet has reallyhelped me and i hope someone will come along soon and give you some more answers, take care.

Wish I could say something to help, but I'm just reading this. Please keep posting - MN has been a lifeline for me, different issues, but lots of support.

Is home ed an option till a place becomes available? I have no experience but have read other threads where Mums have done this with great success.

SS are there to help you. I know its one more thing to deal with, but use them if they can support you in any way.

I second the taxi suggestion from dsr. If there is a safety issue then something must be done. For him and for you.

Never send hugs but I'm sending you some. I hope things improve soon x

Crace, I agree with Attila about contacting the NAS or IPSEA for advice. If he's getting totally stressed out by the situations and causing real problems, is there something the local GP can do too? If he could sign son off school with stress for a while, etc, that could at least give you some thinking space? You could definitely do with some better support than you're getting, and much better understanding from them.

I will be contacting them, thanks Attila. I haven't been able to talk to SS as they hadn't yet received the "referral" but it's a nightmare. I actually found out what happened just this morning so in a way I am glad that I have more details to give SS when I talk to them. There is now a bullying issue as well.

I will be bringing him to the bus stop from now on, but it's a bit of a nightmare really. I can't be there to get him home. Honestly all I can be thankful for is that my son is oblivious to it all, and it's not affecting him. I am just so annoyed and frustrated.

In a way, I am rather glad that it's gone to SS maybe we can push for him to get a taxi, as he's been statemented now and it's a safety issue.

We've been to the GP and referred to CAHMS but they don't have appointments any time soon. We are just waiting to wait. I just don't understand why SN children aren't more of a priority!

Well luckily the SS team didn't feel there was an issue with me, in fact were more concerned about the lack of support we are getting, and the fact we have been referred left right and centre but waiting waiting to be seen. They will try and pull a few strings and may do an all agency meeting for a child in need to speed things up. I just hate that I am on SS radar, I could do without it really but I am thinking positively.

In the meantime I've kept him home today and he isn't meant to be back until Thursday anyway and hopefully I will have an update from SS on what we can do to keep him safe on the way to school, as well as AT school. I know I may get myself in trouble, but if he is getting bullied and takes it on himself to walk home or away he could be really in trouble. It scares the life out of me, he is safest at home where I can take care of him.

I did mention that we are waiting to get him into a specialist school as well, so hopefully they can push that along too, or is that too much to hope for?

Not at all- the more poeple on your side the better.

Ask the statementing poelpe about a taxi- we were offered one if ds3 had gone to the other local school as I would have 2 statemented kids in different schools, and there's only so many places one can be at a time!

as well as Ipsea, SOS!SEN are pretty fantastic i think, try searching for them and giving them a call- a fountain of info IME.

How long has the statement been in palce? It might be you need to call a statement review at some oint and raise all these issues; it was something we did with ds3 after 6 months.

Literally 4 weeks, and we've had to fight for a placement in a non-mainstream school nevermind a taxi etc. But they are in for a phone call tomorrow morning, I didn't realise I could call and ask for a taxi! They aren't exactly forthcoming with this stuff are they!

Not in the slightest and they will pull every trick to hide it- the taxi might need to go in the statement though so do call SOS!SEN or IPSEA first and get their advice / case studies etc.

our LEA are wondrous , had a letter today wanting feedbac for a review by next month- REVIEW IN MARCH! So tehy will try saying everything we raise is out of date and denying right to ask for anything new. Don't know why they bother, the know it won't wash PMSL- they'll get the form 10 days before ther eview, as ever.