How do you get a child with possible ASD to stay in a bed?

[Marne]

Dd2 (almost 3) still sleeps in a cot, i have decided she is getting to big and needs a small bed. I have bid on this on e-bay as it has high sides which will make it harder for her to get out.

How the hell am i going to keep her in? She is a runner and can get out of most things, she has poor comunication and is non-verbal.

Please tell me i'm not going to spend the next month putting her back into bed evry 5 minutes?

Any tips please?

stair gate across the bedroom door, make sure windows are unopenable and there's nothing dangerus in the bedroom.
Least she will be contained in the bedroom.

And make the bed very ASD-friendly: weighted blankets, very soft or smooth bedding, a little bit of light in the room so she can see what's what (many of us hate the dark). We're often hopeless sleepers if there's anything even slightly uncomfortable or noisy - because we're hypersensitive to clothes labels, seams, rough material, ticking clocks, people moving in the house etc. And we wake up with our brains already racing to go and explore something. It's not going to be easy, but it all might help a bit...

I second the gate and locked windows. We also use a weighted blanket and dim lighting.

Gate will be a bit tricky as she will be sharing a room with dd1 (as) who will freak out if i put a stair gate on as she won't be able to get out to go to the loo.

At the moment she sleeps down stairs as dd1 isn't a great sleeper, i didn't want them to wake each other up, do you think i should start with the bed downstairs as then i could stay with her and we have a stair gate on the door (room is ASD friendly/safe), then i could move her upstairs with dd1 once she has got the hang of staying in bed?

Not looking forward to this, its one of those things you put off for as long as possible , my plan is to have her sleeping upstirs by christmas .

I will try weighted blankets with her, at the moment she will only sleep on top of the covers so she wears a fleece sleepsuit which seems to keep her settled, it doesn't take much to wake her up though.

At the moment she in a travel cot as she climbed out the wooden one. I think once she is asleep she will stay asleep till the morning (hopefuly), its just getting her to sleep that will be the problem, she has slept in her sisters room, in tha cot a couple times and has slept in her sisters bed once for a nap but she was extra tierd (still took an hour to get her to lie down.)

like nmc says

now, if ayone has any ideas how to keep a ASd 9 yr ol in bed..........

(ironic LOL)

errrmmm blu-tak?

TBH when my ASD child gets to this point (and trust me im putting it off as long as possible too!) i dont think i will be as quick with the witty retort.

Hi. My ds has a Tom Cot by Bakare and it is FANTASTIC! He has Angelman Syndrome which includes having a sleep disorder (they dont) and obviously no awareness of danger etc etc. This bed has been a godsend, he goes at 7pm but at least when he does wake he cant get out. It has double (full length) opening doors and a rise and fall base which is great for dressing and changing him. We chose to have perspex windows instead of bars as it makes cleaning smeared poo at 3am so much easier! And it looks less like a prison cell! I was a bit unsure of 'locking him in' at first but he loves the security of it to be honest. It gets a bit noisy when he bangs but we get over it. Its better than not sleeping! He can see his telly and has some toys in with him. His bed is about 6ft high so he cant get out. We dont get beds in Bolton through the local authority so we got it funded through The Cauldwell Trust. Kidz North next week has some other makes and it is well worth having a look. Hope it helps. x

this? it looks nice and cosy.

Yes-its fantastic! ther companies do similar ones and you dont have to have it bilt so high. Another one to look at is this.

Sorry-that should say other and built.

agree with needmorecoffee, stairgate across the door worked for us.

I thought it would be a total nightmare with ds1 (no pun intended!) but after a couple of nights of getting up once or twice and howling at the gate he soon learned to put himself back to bed. Dropping his daytime nap meant he was really tired by 7pm so it honestly hasn't been a problem at all. Good luck!

a cotbed would last till 5 wouldn't it - with high sides as designed for a baby?

best wishes,

lingle

I thought dd1 would be a nightmare - she stayed in her cotbed (with the sides still on) until she was about 3.4. I just couldn't cope with the thought of disturbing her previous good sleeping habits.

i made her room totally safe (she has her bed, with obligatory teddies) and an armchair for story times/for her to curl up on and read as she settles, and that's it. oh, she also has some floor cushions by her bed, put there intially in case she fell out (has done so twice in all).

She goes up to bed the same, and sings/reads/looks out of the window until she falls asleep. Luckily, she hasn't worked out that she could open the door if she tried , but I have the stairgate waiting for when she does

I thought she would freak out at the change, but actually she took it really well. she loves her bed, and it's also made our lives so much easier when going away/on holiday etc as she used to hate her travel cot and scream the place down, but now curls up happily on any old bed!

We will see how we get on with the bed. I like your link (the tent knid of bed) monster, is it possible to get funding for a bed? if so how do i go about it?

Hi Marne, some local authorities are funding Safespaces, especially as respite providers are using them more and more. Failing that try Cerebra, Children Today The Cauldwell Trust, Variety club etc. Some housing associations also fund them for their tennants. There are loads of Charities and Trusts on line if the above dont work for you. Cerebra also run a sleep service and have a specialist sleep nurse. I'll look up some websites and post a link soon. (not tonight I'm too tired!!)

hi my son sleeps in a bed in our room but every night crawls across when dad is downstairs watching news and russia today i tear my hair out but i also put reclycled bin liners under sheets on dads side and my sons bed as never sure where he will be dad does not even notice these bags... but still a big dilemma ...........and some times i end up in my son bed ...what can one do... i sympathize with you..but my son is 6..

i'm definitely the wrong person to ask. ds has slept in a double bed with either me or his dad since he was 1 and able to escape from his cot.

currently, his dad sleeps in ds's bed with him at the start of the night, and by morning ds has joined me and his baby sister in the other room.

sleep? wouldn't it be nice....

I thought DS3 (aged 4, autistic) would be awful when it came to moving to a bed but surprisingly he was not that dreadful. He is also non-verbal.

For the first few nights I did have to sit outside his room and put him back into bed every turn about.

But then he just seemed to "get" it.

He does stay up very late for a four-year-old - he is regularly still wide awake at 9.30 p.m. - but he just goofs about with his brothers a bit (they don't go to bed until 9.20 on weeknights) and looks at books or opens and closes the doors of the bathroom cupboard, and generally then gets into bed and goes to sleep when he is tired enough. Every so often the wheels do come off and we have a big screaming session before bed (last night was a case in point) but all in all, given how autistic he is, it has not been half as bad as I expected.

We have a stairgate at teh top of the stairs and I just leave that closed and it is very rare that he tries to come back down stairs again, although he can open the gate now if he tries.

at least i'm not alone on this one...

DS3 didn't sleep all that well in the cot - he has definitely been a better sleeper since moving to a bed. Think he likes the extra space.