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SN children

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Original poster

DLA for a child 16+

21 replies

misscutandstick · 21/10/2008 13:12

Ive recently been awarded (7wks ago!) care at middle rate and lower mobility for DS1 (ADHD+). I rang this morning to see where the payments have gone (worked out it should have been this morning ie. 4wks after the last payment).

The woman said that as he is now 16, they need to send out someone to check that i can be his appointee for payments and to check WITH HIM THAT ITS OK...??? WHAT????

Surely if he was capable of managing his own money, (and not to mention a million other 'normal' things like what to wear in the morning, reminding him to eat and drink, and encouraging the basics like brushing hair/teeth and washing) then in this particular case, he wouldnt be entitled to DLA! (i understand that other children/adults can manage financial affairs and its a physical dysability thats the problem - apologies to anyone i may have inadvertantly offended)

So now they want to send someone out (in the next 2 or 3wks or so ) to check if its ok with him if i receive his money on his behalf! OMG he doesnt even know he gets it - he would want to buy endless pokemon cards with it if he knew! And i would rather him not know! what can i do???

THe only other option i suppose would be to have it put in his bank account (yes he has one, which i have internet banking acess to, and he doesnt use because hes not really capable of making financial decisions yet and gets his pocket money in cash so he can see what it looks like and what he has left, anyhoo...) and then i could just transfer, but would that not look a little odd? especially when it came to next award??? OOOhhh i dont know.

what is the usual thing here?

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Original poster

misscutandstick · 21/10/2008 18:17

no-one got a DC with award whos 16+?

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2shoesdrippingwithblood · 21/10/2008 18:26

yikes that is scarey.
sorry My dd is only 13 and I haven't heard of this happening.
very strange. I wouldn't panic just yet though as they most probally won't just ask him direct(I hope) If you get really stuck(I am sure someone will come a long and help) I can ask my freind if this happend with her ds(16 with cp)

Original poster

misscutandstick · 21/10/2008 18:31

thanks 2 shoes

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Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 21/10/2008 18:54

I've heard about this before - my dd is 16 next year so it will be interesting to see what happens. Although her DLA is for physical problems so maybe it's handled differently I think you have to sign to say that you are their advocate, and they confirm with him that it's OK for you to handle the claim and the money. Tough decision.

Original poster

misscutandstick · 21/10/2008 19:04

i know, he really isnt capable of handling finances at all. At 16 he can understand what a price is, but not really wether or not its an acceptable/reasonable price or not. I suppose its the value of money he still doesnt get. He could be very easily taken advantage of, hes very gullible and naiive.

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Original poster

misscutandstick · 22/10/2008 18:07

just hoping for any last takers on this subject.

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LollipopViolet · 22/10/2008 18:29

When I turned 16, my mum asked if I wanted my DLA (low rate mobility) to go into my bank or stay in hers. Since I'd just opened a bank account, with her help, I said I'd take it. It's built up rather nicely now Sorry, my problem is sensory (sight issues) so not much help. PS: I'm 18 now.

countingto10 · 22/10/2008 20:24

I'm seeing someone next week for the same reason - my DS1 is turning 16 and has HFA/aspergers. He doesn't know he is getting DLA and thinks he is extremely capable and can't be told otherwise ! He also comes across as extremely capable to the lay person.But he is very vunerable and naive and will give his money to anyone who asks. Last week I took him bowling with a friend who also has ASD but year older. He didn't want me hanging around so I walked around town. What I didn't know was the other boy had hardly any money on him and my DS1 spent all the money I gave him paying for this boy to bowl and have lunch! I have requested that the money is paid into my son's b/society a/c which I control. He is hopefully going to a residential college next year and, no doubt, everything will have to be transferred then.

I think I am going to have to try and brief my DS1 before the meeting and hope he understands (which should be interesting).

Original poster

misscutandstick · 22/10/2008 20:34

Thanks for the message COUNTING, i have to agree that DS1 is the same! a charming young man for anyone that meets him for 30mins. He was good at 'holding back with his "crazy"' when he was younger too, which is why it took us over 4yrs to get anyone to listen and believe us! but i digress...

good luck with the debriefing hope it goes well for you both.

Please (if its not too much hassle) could you let me know how it goes? Wishing you lots of luck, and keeping fingers crossed, Keeley XXX

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Original poster

misscutandstick · 22/10/2008 20:40

Thanks lollipop, glad to know its worked well for you - but DS has ADHD (and others) and is not only quite young for his age, he just 'doesnt get' a lot of life, and needs guidance very often just to 'fit in' with society. He is not yet independant enough to cope financially or mentally with money.

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2shoesdrippingwithblood · 22/10/2008 21:24

is there someone who you could get to be there, like a teacher/sw who could explain to the DLA paople about his problems?

Original poster

misscutandstick · 22/10/2008 21:54

are you asking me or COUNTING, 2shoes?

I have home ed DS1 since year 5, so he doesnt go to school, and we have never had a social worker as we've managed to contain most of his 'awkward' behaviour. Also we have moved and no-one really knows him here , I have always felt that he can manage without meds, so the GP has never seen him either. Basically we are on our own (as a family) but as family life in general is fairly settled, theres never been a need to involve outside help, especially now as hes older.

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countingto10 · 30/10/2008 14:34

Hi misscutandstick, had my meeting this morning. The rep was here for about 15/20 mins. She needed to fill out a form to appoint me and she explained to my DS what was happening. She asked him if he knew about it. I had briefed him earlier in the week and said that the money would be paid into his a/c (which I control) but the paperwork would come to me so he wouldn't get anxious and upset about it. He understood this and agreed (he get very anxious about paperwork/homework etc). My DS does understand that he does need extra help with things.

On a plus side, he has been awarded his DLA indefinitely now so hopefully no more review forms for the time being unless anything changes. Maybe the powers that be have decided that aspergers/hfa is a lifelong condition that is not curable

It was quite a painless procedure so don't threat too much - I don't think they are there to assess your DS's condition but it might be wise to brief him like I did with my DS so it doesn't come "out of the blue".

Good luck

countingto10 · 30/10/2008 15:24

should be "fret" not "threat"

Original poster

misscutandstick · 30/10/2008 23:19

oh thats fantastic!!! that is a bit of good news for you. im pleased that they have taken that decision.

on a similar vein... i received a letter (well actually in DS1's name) saying when the money is going into the bank to start with, and then just says:

"we will continue to paying your DLA into your account... please note we may look at you award again from time to time to make sure that you are getting the right amount of DLA. This means that if the amount of help you need has changed [blah blah blah] If there has been no change in the amount of help you need then your award will stay the same."

Then it goes on the same as usual about appealing and stuff...

but there seems to be no mention of a review date. The original letter we got for the latest award letter mentioned something about his 18th birthday, but also mentioned that they would "[see above statement]" as well... so do we have to reapply at 18? (depending on circumstances of course) or not? or am i being overly hopeful (about not having to fill in those horrendous forms) or am I reading too much into it?

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Original poster

misscutandstick · 30/10/2008 23:19

OOOPs sorry, forgot to say HUGE THANKS for getting back to me

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countingto10 · 31/10/2008 14:05

I'm not really sure - I have mislaid the letter - there was no time frame in the letter unlike previous letters so assume yours is the same. I would imagine if you have been receiving DLA for a long time (like me) that eventually they will give it to you indefinitely otherwise they will be "drowning" in paperwork.

The letters they produce are pretty standard and so you probably are reading too much into it. I, personally, hate dealing with these people and any letter from them strikes terror into me. As my son goes to boarding school I have to send them the dates he is at home and they have managed to lose the last lot !!!! I've given them to the rep that came round so hopefully they will make it to the right dept (maybe).

Have you got an appointment yet ?

Original poster

misscutandstick · 31/10/2008 17:53

no not yet (to the appointment).

DS1 has been getting DLA since he was around 8 (i think, 9 at the oldest).

Like your last letter, the last one i got had no review date/time frame either. might have to dig out the previous letters and compare - i know im getting obsessed

But i suppose its a 'wait and see' situation. You never know, Ds1 may just 'grow out of his adhd, dyspraxia, et al. '

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Original poster

misscutandstick · 18/11/2008 22:32

Just wanted to drag this thread back up, for a bit of moral support (hate dealings with DLA), got the woman coming round tomorrow at 10am to make me an 'appointee' or something. bit nervous [worried emoticon]

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Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 19/11/2008 10:26

oh good luck tomorrow. It sounds like you have DLA indefinitely and this review is just the 16+ thing. As far as I know they don't do it again at 18.

I'll be shouting for your advice this time next year.

Original poster

misscutandstick · 19/11/2008 12:19

well, shes been - it really didnt take long at all. She did however, talk to both of us like we were complete baffoons. It took about 10-15mins, and thats only because she chatted to DS4 about Thomas T.T.E. She actually only asked DS1 a couple of questions along the lines of "can you complete the forms, or would you like mum to do it?" and that was about it. thanks for your support saggar. XXX

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