Can i join this board as well please

[mumwhereareyou]

Hi i have 3 children which we adopted 3 yrs ago last week.
Anyway at time of placement we were told that middly DS was a few months behind devopmently but nothing to worry about he would catch up. Now we desperatly wanted a family so just ignored any warning signs that we saw.

Anyway long shot is that he was diagnosed with moderate to severe GDD last year. He is now at main stream school with 25 hours 1-1 help he is in yr1 but realistically he is like a pre school child.

We have private SALT once a fortnight and when we saw her last week, she informed us that he has severe verbal dyspraxia as well as disjointed and disorted speech.

Other than private SALT, NHS is meant to go into school once a term.

He sees paeds every 4 mths, but that is that.

Should we be getting any other help or not, it seems that becuase we don't complain and i always look happy even if not then we are just left to ourselves.

On your advice fellow MNs am just applying for DLA and hope we get it as he is lovely but expensive little boy as in always damaging stuff.

I don't really know much about GDD or where to look for help or info so am open to all suggestions or criticisms or help.

Thanks for reading this long essay.

Hello and welcome. you'll find lots of help on here (not from me tho! - DS still a bubba, just wanted to say hi)

Hello from me, too, and welcome to the board. My DD is also completely different, but wanted to say hi. There are quite a few people on here who can provide you with all sorts of useful info. and I'm sure they'll be along soon!

Welcome to the SN board, my DD has different problems, but someone will come along to give you advice. I hope you manage to get DLA, there are loads of threads incase you need to appeal the decision with advice. DLA can be hard to get sometimes but saying the correct wording helps alot.

Hello & welcome to sn, hope you find lots of help & support here!

hiya, and welcome to the board, i have been a bit absent for a while myself but have been reading a few posts recently. my ds4 is officially GDD with hypermobility, thats it so far, but i know how much hard work he is. i recieve middle rate dla for him but have lost his mobility as and i quote his teacher from last yr 'he participates in pe and playtimes' hmmmm. so like you have been told, wording is important, there are disability help groups out there that can help with the form. as regards support, no i dont think there is anymore, speech and language round here is appalling and after 1 assessment each, ds3 and ds4 both having learning difficulties, the salt is leaving, so we wait yet another 1. ds4 has some salt support in school, and has 26hrs support so around the same as your ds but no tbh we dont get any other support either. hope you get on ok with the dla and good luck with your ds, there will be loads of support here for you.

welcome. I am on your behalf that you haven't been told about DLA earlier! Cerebra give good guidelines about how to fill in the forms.

hello and welcome to the sn topic

Welcome to the SN board.

Thank you for your messages and Tclanger i'm going to check out your blog later thanks.

Yes SALT is really good and works with his problems as well.

Hello and welcome

My DD is 4 and has just started school, she also has full time 1-1 as she has loads of problems including GDD, no speech and physical disabilities.

Have you seen an Occupational Therapist? They can provide advice and equipment to aid learning in school and also equipment to make life easier at home should you need it. Also our LEA has learning disability advisors - one for vision, one for hearing, one for physical disability and I think they have one for learning difficulty. We see the physical disability one and she comes in to see DD regularly, when she was at pre-school and now she has moved to big school. She advises the school and provides what they need to teach DD2 and help her integrate in school. It might be worth asking the school if your LEA has anything like this.

Mumwhereareyou welcome!
It sounds like you have already done quite a lot to support your son ( I saw your other post). My son is a bit older (nearly 9) and has been with us for 7 years, had a Dx of GDD at 4 and now has a Dx of autism, adhd and moderate to severe learning disabilty. A lot of children get a Dx of GDD whilst they are young and it is not quite sure why and what the future holds. Later the Dx may get clearer or it may not! It is even harder with adopted children since often the family and birth history is sketchy at best!
A good speech therapist is important and I learnt a lot from ours (expensive but worth it)including how to play therapeutically. I found a few sessions with the OT very helpful to know what to work on and how to include 'therapy' within play as Ds cannot cope with anything formal. Of course the NHS should provide these things - its always worth trying to get NHS OT.
If you could do with behavioural support you may need to get a referral to CAMHS ( Child and adolescent mental health services I think). You could also approach the postadoption support services who may have specialised connections. It may also be worth asking SW PA team too if there is any more information on extended family history that SS have on file and can give you. They often have more information available and tend to be more honest post adoption!
Another thing is to find out what Mencap are doing locally - some help run sn clubs including play activities and holiday clubs.
Finally is there a local additional needs register or list? Getting on the mail list can be helpful to find out what is available locally and sometimes you can get discounts locally on entrances.
You may be able to get respite or shortbreaks to give you a chance to spend time with the dds- again I would have thought approach the PA SW team. Best wishes Magso

Hello and welcome - can't think of anything to add at the moment but was wondering if the help your ds gets at school is through a statement?

Hi my dd has different diagnoses to your ds, but I wanted to say hello.

Good luck with DLA, agree Cerebra are great.

I have one dd with SN, and one adopted dd, who is NT.

Thanks for all your advice, am going to ring and find out about NHS OT as think he would benefit from it, he has no balance and has a very funny gait when he walks or runs.

Magso we adopted from another county, but will try and track down Lincs PASW if they have one. CAHMS won't see him as they say he is too young and unable to communicate properly.

I will also find out about local register as we could do with a break now and then just to spend time with our girls.

I think its the not knowing and how he is so different from everyone else especially at school.

Today took him into school and one of the other boys in class comes up and says i'm having a party but mum says you can't come. His mum went bright red and mumbled something about that not being true and she had left invite at home. I just turned round and said thats okay i wouldn't want to go if he is not welcome. Then came home and had a good cry.

Sorry for waffling on but don't really want to tell RL friends as they don't understand.

Aw, poor DS and poor you. There are lots of threads on here about kids being left out. Sometimes I can sort of understand if there are massive behavioural issues (not that I think its right), but then, NT kids can be a bloody nightmare too, especially if there's party food involved. People are strange. One time a Mum physically moved herself and her child away from me & DS when I said he had significant brain damage. Like its contagious or something! Can't imagine what I'll be like when he's older, I'll probably lamp someone or collapse into a snivelling heartbroken mess. Probably both. Just thinking about it upsets me. Is he aware he's being left out? (Sorry if that sounds completely ignorant of his condition)

Oh Mumwhereareyou that all sounds so familiar both the being left out of parties and the wanting to know! {hugs}.
Ds is now at a special school and gets to go to parties again (parents come too which is just as well since there is no school gate meeting up now Ds goes by school taxibus!) I used to feel so upset and guilty at the lack of invites and reciprocated playdates too. Ds sometimes noticed and got upset too.
PAS should be for all adoptive families.
Personally the not knowing was very hard for me too. I felt I had to do 'something' to cover all bases, (was it neglect, his prematurity, difficulties at birth, the moving around, attachment problems, somthing the BF did or didn't do - his genes - you just don't know!)and set to on trying to improove ds attachments, attention span, language and coordination via his interest!
Actually I am much more comfortable with this now. I still dont know the why ( never will). Frankly a lot of the problem for me was getting the right support for ds at school.