Family holidays with a child with SN's

[Thomcat]

Hi all

Just got back from a week in Cornwall with DP and the 3 girls.

On paper it should have been idyllic but actually is was very challenging, difficult, stressful, draining, tiring .... you get my point.

Lottie just has her own agenda, on every thing, all the time, all day. It's no one big thing just lots of different little things really. It's the complete lack of any form of co-operation. The bloody mindedness, the unbelievable stubbornness, the inability to be able to reason with her even just a little, her refusal to walk, her desire to do her own thing, on her own. It's just so hard to work in 2 other children to that and keep everyone happy. She's great but she does just makes it all so hard bless her.

So - do any of you guys know oh a holiday where there SN's children are welcomed? Where perhaps there are activities, a kids club where they would be able to entertain a child with SN's for an hour or so a day?

How do you lot deal with a family holiday or is it just a fact that there really is no such thing as a holiday in the true sense of the word and we are just going to have to deal with the fact that we'll sit there at the end of each day, drained, then grit our teeth and somehow get through the next day and the next until it's time to come home!

What a picture of doom and gloom. It wasn't all bad, there were nice moments! But generally it was challenging.

TC x

Hi TC

yes I'll put some pics on Facebook!

our main problem with holidays really is that ds1 has no concept of staying inside and no indoor activities that keep him occupied. He can't watch DVD's, he can't play computer games. He doesn't play with toys. He will sit down to eat but that's it.

Other houses have windows that open that he tries to climb out, tents have no boundaries and lots of ground to run around- with no idea that he needs to stay near the tent. He's just gone. Whether that's across the road a mile away or straight into a river (and he can't swim).

It's even more supervision than he needs at home. No chance to sit and read a book as he won't stay in anywhere. And most places are built to be easy to get out and hard to get in. Not built in a way that's hard to get out. Ireland worked because we stayed in the in-laws cottage and sent them a list of locks etc that they had to buy before we could go, but you can't doo that in normal holidays. The problem with Ireland is that there is no way ds1 could manage a plane (or the other passengers couldn;t manage him) - so the trip over (2 days) needs extra adults.

He incidentally, loves holidays. He's quite happily go away all the time. He constantly asks to go on a ferry shudder. But it's a 3 adult job really.

Jimjams: Sounds hard,maybe using DP they could help to pay for someone to come with you. And family fund holiday money could help aswell.

This place looks good, and I'm told that you get a reduction in price and sometimes it's free.

BREAK
Davison House
1 Montague Road
Sheringham
Norfolk
NR26 8WN

Tel: 01263 822161
Fax: 01263 822181
E-mail: [email protected]
Website: www.break-charity.org

BREAK is a charitable organisation which provides holidays, respite, short stay and emergency care for children and adults with special needs, and their families. Situated on the Norfolk coast, the centres provide 24 hour care by specialist staff teams, with a full range of equipment and adaptations to cater for a wide range of disabilities. BREAK also provides self catering holidays for families with special needs.

Just in case you are still reading this thread Tomcat, there is another site specialkidsintheuk.org and they have a forum like this one, and a big bunch of them have all met up at a camping holiday (well it said camp so it might not be actual camping), I don't know the particulars but I assume there are provisions for SN children, there is a post about the 'camp' on the forum under 'general' it could be worth a look for next year.

Calvert trust place in Devon got a rave reveiw from a friend of mine. She did one of their activity weeks with her 2 teenagers ( one has CP and VI & is power chair user) . Sounded like whole family had good time doing new stuff and getting throughly physically exhusted.
Older kids than OP tho so may not be quite your thing yet.

I am still reading and making notes. Thank you

Our situation is just like Jimjams, she has described it perfectly. We used to take time off at home and go out and about but we never got a break until DS went to overnight respite. For some years it bothered other people more than it bothered us but we didn't have other children to consider. As some of you will have read here, we just had our first 2 week holiday in 15 years with DD bt we didn't take DS. As he is now at residential school coming home is his holiday iyswim and he is quite happy with that. We had to learn not to project our own expectations onto him. But it is different when you've got the other kids to consider but I think we all really need to assess honestly if a holiday is really that and if not, why are we doing it or is there another way to do it? I have some friends who just had their first holiday away with their 2 non-SN kids and they had some kind family come to their home to stay with their DS who was absolutely fine and had more organised activities at home, plus familiar surroundings, than he would away somewhere. I don't know if these have been posted, I got them from a Fledglings newsletter:

"During the school holidays you may be looking for things to do and places to go which fit with your family's needs. When planning your trips you may find the following website useful: www.tourismforall.org.uk

If you are staying at home this summer, now may be a good time to start planning an away break next year or even later this year. Look at these websites (click links below) and see if you are inspired:

www.break-charity.org/
www.happydayscharity.org/
www.libertychil d.org.uk/
www.livability.org.uk/landing.asp?id=9
www.calvert-trust.org.uk/
w ww.h-s-holidays.co.uk/

Thanks Davros

For any one that is interested, DH asked about the other activity centre that is highly recommended at PHAB last night and was told it is called 'Skern Lodge' and it is based at Appledore in North Devon.

The members of PHAB who have been to several of these types of centres (Calvert Trust, Vitalise centres, etc), said it really was the best that any of them had been to.