All autistic children are..

[Hecate]

INDIVIDUAL CHILDREN!!!!

I bloody loathe the whole "autistic children like X, autistic children hate Y, autistic children are all Z" It drives me loco!

There are as many ways to be autistic as there are autistic people!

Do any of you get the whole "Oh, your child is autistic, they all don't they?

My boys are both autistic and are totally different. I bet if any of you met up with me and mine, our children would be totally different.

It just makes me [head blows up emoticon] that people see Autism and not a unique individual with a personality all of their own.

• - - - post inspired by "Oh, they're all really good at maths, aren't they" comment today.

Any suggestion of things to reply to stuff like the above, gratefully received!

I guess really it's just reflective of life in general - some folks like some things, some don't, in infinite combinations. I suppose that's the most annoying thing about the 'rainman' references - even if you had zero knowledge about autism why would you assume that all autistic people would be the same?

Although I do always by ds' pants from the same place, he does have a great memory and he loves to dance...

Yup, we're all individuals. Hubby and I are two very different Aspies (with apologies to those who don't like the term Aspie, but we use it for ourselves even if we use ASD as the preferred general term).

He couldn't care less what others think, is very very organised and neat, has a photographic memory for detail, and is unstoppable in a business setting (which makes him impossible to argue against in negotiations, so he tends to win them all!). He responds to social situations by going to sleep or saying and doing things that are truly eye-opening as he doesn't realise they're inappropriate (bless him). He has very few friends and simply doesn't want any more. He has no clue how to navigate anywhere, and his talent in art, music or spatial/practical things is about zero. He's more interested in simple romantic comedy films than I am.

I'm far more likely to panic, far more likely to care whether people like me or not (though without much clue how to achieve that a lot of the time), and have a wide variety of friends (though I'm never sure how to converse with more than one at once). I'm not very neat (apart from specific things), and not very bold in negotiations as I can't think of the words if things get heated. I am good at art, music and can navigate extremely well, and can usually figure out practical things if I know enough detail.

Very different individuals, with very different interests. It works really well as a combination because we can compensate for each other's challenges.

"If you've met one person on the autistic spectrum, you've met one person on the autistic spectrum". Never a truer sentence.

I have hinted on here that as a child I had special needs but didnt in in to any details. But as others have talked about themselves here goes. Officially I was said to have behavioural problems but if more was known about HFA and AS in the early ninties I am pretty sure I would have had a dx of one or the other. I think thats why when I work with autistic clients I am often praised for how well I work with them, because I can easily enter into their world as I am already halfway there and can think on their level. The only weakness I can identify with myself is I sometimes have difficulty with communicating as not one for small talk. I have found ways round this most of the time. Sorry for the one long paragraph, my phone does not have a return key.

Yeah what is it with this Thomas the tank? My dd is not interested at all. Perhapes if she watched it from a very early age it may have been one of her obsessions but its not.

Seuss - The school are presumming that all autistic children are motivated by thomas tank? That is really wrong. They need to find out each childs 'individual' motivation and work with them around that, or the children will get no desire to communucate.

Amber32002 - quote: "If you've met one person on the autistic spectrum, you've met one person on the autistic spectrum". Never a truer sentence. - So true. xx

Supportman - have you concidered getting a diagnosis as an adult? More and more adults are now a days. I would say as a child I fitted many of the criteria for AS. My father certainly does too. If he were to be seen now I would be sure he would have a diagnosis of AS.

BeautifulSpectrum - The school have a lot of Thomas tank stuff for the littlies but did find more appropriate motivators for ds. I think they already had a few who adored Thomas and thought ds might too - they soon changed tactics once they realised though.

Looking back I definately had some unusual ways as a child, quite poor social skills (passed off as painfully shy), obsessive compulsive tendencies (had to do everything twice for a long, long time) and i had a few tics at times too. I guess a lot of us show some of the signs some of the time which is why proffesionals are so reluctant to dx (although don't want to give them any excuses!)

Not really beautifulspectrum. I think at the time would have been helpful, but wouldn't be of much use now. Also these things take so long, my little brother has only just been dx with AS after 2 years of meetings and assesments.