big decision

[Romy7]

dh has two jobs he has been offered o'seas. we can go on temp work permit, leaving nhs and ed, and maybe get permanent res there (depending on whether they accept dd2, who may be medically inadmissible due to her cp), or maybe have to return to the UK in two years and start nhs and ed all over again (statement will not stand)... probably private health insurance in the interim.
this COULD be the start of a whole new life, or it could be out of the frying pan into the fire....
at the mo we are in a long emigration queue (of which medicals would play a part, so we would know before we got anywhere near travelling) but the queue is about 5 years long and may increase due to new regs...
any words of wisdom or what you would do in our situation greatly appreciated...

No immediate words of wisdom, but I can appreciate how hard it is for you. We live in France and moved here when DD was 18 mos. As a toddler, she seemed a bit off in her own little world, but it wasn't until 3 years 4 mos we realised that her communication problems were a bit more than just being bilingual. The week before she was diagnosed with speech and language disorder we had put in an offer on an appartment, i.e. finally tying ourselves to staying put here. We agonised for a long time about whether to go back to the UK, but in the end decided that there were lots of positives here. Partly being close to a big city (we're about 1/2 hour from Paris) means that we've got lots of medical specialists around, which we wouldn't necessarily have in the UK unless we were in or near London. Partly, having private health insurance can sometimes make things happen a bit quicker. Partly it's all DD knows now, and the salary DH gets here, coupled with the fact that housing is cheaper, allows me to stay at home. All I can say is this, take time to make your decision. Remember that a lot of DD's wellbeing is also how you and DH feel, so if you would be happier abroad and DH would be happier in this job, that's also important. Consider what the medical support is going to be like. Lots of stuff might be just the same. We're trying to get DD statemented here and it also takes a long time, but we do at least get to deal with one person locally rather than an LEA, so sometimes the admin is easier, for other things it's harder. Also, for medical stuff, I honestly believe the NHS is brilliant...when you finally get through to the people who know what they are doing, and that can take time. We've been referred to specialists much quicker here than I think we would be in the UK. Hopefully the company that is offering DH the job should be able to help you to make some of these decisions - they often have relocation consultants who will be able to tell you what it's like when you actually get there...
Where are you thinking of going? Hope you are able to make the right decision for ALL of you!

canada - which is notoriously difficult to get in (permanent resident) for those with a disability of any description... but could be easy for two years on a temp work permit with application for permanent res filed straight away (to get medicals and find out if...)
dd2 is five in september and we've just finished statementing for school lol.
i think what is so difficult is the medical thing may take the decision out of our hands long term, but we might not get the chance if we hang around and wait.
we've actually lived there before prior to dd2 - i came back when i was 32 weeks with her - stupidly! ds1 was born there and has dual citizenship... if we'd stayed for another 3 months she would have been dual citizenship too and there wouldn't be a question about her settling permanently... we actually own a house there which is rented out. as this was a long term goal we haven't bothered to sell up and bring the cash back so we don't actually own property in this country!
bit scary - we've been in the same place for two years now and i know and like all our therapists, i have sorted out school and statement and it has all worked perfectly... even met the LSAa and she has settling in sessions from next week...
have literally no idea of how the sn set up works, but i do know a lovely lady with a much older boy with similar cp to dd2 who i think i'm going to e-mail with a list of questions... she knows we are planning to come out there at some point and had always offered to help in whatever way... might be time to call her in!! i suspect that the companies he is in discussion with will not have a clue about disability related med insurance, and strongly suspect that dh is totally the wrong person to sort out that side of things, if you get my drift...

Try searching on yahoogroups (and similar). That's how I found a group for SN kids in France which was really helpful for the admin side of things.

oh, thanks for the tip - i'll swing by and have a look!