How to get a referral for ND pathway

[Sexentric]

So im pretty sure DC has dyspraxia. He was late to roll, late to sit up and would sort of slouch sideways in a high chair. He never crawled. He did walk on time but has always been clumsy. He struggles with fine motor skills, couldn't hold a pen, only got his pen license at age 10, only learnt to tie shoelaces at 10 (after a lot of tears and shouting) struggles to follow instructions- he can't translate for example 'kick your feet but dont bend your knèes' in a swimming class. I could go on.
His twin brother i think is possibly showing signs of ADHD. He struggles to stick to a task. For example he'll regularly be getting dressed and will get distracted by something and I'll come in 10 minutes later and he'll have his trousers halfway on, like literally at his knees and be engrossed in something random. He can't stay seated for a whole meal will get up every single time usually more than once. He wants to be 'good'. Like really wants to but seems to not manage it a lot of the time.
We also have a strong family history of ND - boh ASD and ADHD diagnosed and j suspect boh their dad and myself are probably dyspraxic.
I asked the GP for a referral. They said referrals have to come from the school.
However the school are saying there is no problem. I think because both are well behaved and no bother. So wont refer. Despite the PE teacher describing one of them as having no coordination between his arms and legs.
What do I do? GP says school has to refer. School wont. Is that it?
They're year 6 and I really was hoping to have at least got the ball rolling before they're in secondary. I could absolutely see one faling behind, and the other being bullied for his inability to play sports. He already has self esteem issues.
Please help

Pay privately. It's really the only option. For a specific ADHD assessment though don't bother unless you have support from the school as you need evidence of the difficulties in 2 settings. ADHD you are looking at £1k+ for an assessment with a decent psychologist, we got my son diagnosed with Dyspraxia by an EP and then an assessment with an OT for a total of about £650 so thats cheaper and easier.

Does a private diagnosis have the same weight with schools? Do they have to take it seriously like they would an NHS one?

Schools and LAs cannot refuse to accept an independent assessment and diagnosis purely because it is independent. And support in schools is based on needs, not diagnosis.

If you are interested in medication for ADHD if diagnosed and affording ongoing prescriptions would be an issue, you should check your GP will accept shared care. Many will not now.

I would speak to the school again. If not, go back to the GP.

You could look at RTC, especially for an ADHD assessment. However, some ICBs have paused RTC ADHD and ASD referrals.

In some areas, you can self refer to OT. The route of DCD assessment varies area to area, but the OT should be able to refer onwards if necessary.