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[twoisplenty]

It does worry me when my ds watches tv (for example) and watches children doing "normal" active things, running, jumping, dancing, singing etc. My ds (9 years old) has cp and can vaguely walk slowly with a walking frame, and has no real speech except for a few words.

So what is he thinking?

What do children with mobility issues make of other children? I know I can't shield him from real life, but it does worry me. It makes me feel uncomfortable watching active children in my ds presence.

My ds sister (4yo) goes to dancing classes, gymnastic class and talks non stop! My ds has always accepted this, even when she learned to walk. But he is older now. Surely the penny will drop?

So, in general, I wonder what children with mobility problems are thinking?

Can anyone relate to what I am saying? I'm not the best at explaining my thoughts.

I know what you're saying - my dd is 2 and has cp and can't walk at the moment. I take my older girl to ballet and have to take dd with me and the place is full of little girls her age dancing around. At the moment she doesn't seem to notice but I'm dreading the point when she does. It also pisses me off that there are no images of disabled children in the media. On Nickjr there used to be 'the weather song' on in the mornings and there were loads of kids dancing including one using a walking frame. They recently re-made the weather song - minus the disabled kid of course , I just want dd to have some images of children who are like her. The closest thing we have is a bloody topsy and tim book where there is a little girl in a wheelchair and dd loves it and says 'poorly legs like me'. .

sorry, off on one there a bit - it's good to rant sometimes!

www.bookstart.org.uk/Parents-and-carers/Bookstart-and-different-needs/Positive-images

some useful links on the above page to info about books featuring kids with disabilities, and to a gallery of picture book type illustrations of kids with disabilities from scope website.

hmmm interesting. I used to think that ds1 didn't really notice (severely autistic) until I made a comment to him about it being easier if he could talk and he howled and howled. I did show him a video of a non-verbal boy about his age typing to communicate and he really liked that.

I think going to special school helps as he's surrounded by his peer group all day.

Hmm tricky one. But I always show him books etc written by non-verbal people now and he seems interested.

twoisplenty, mine is thinking 'i want to ski, i want to snowboard, i want to skateboard...' so we explain, she can, but she does have to do it differently. and then we spend the next year working out how. and boy does she loooove to sledge.... and boy is she heavy to pull back up again...

incidentally, you can sign up to scope's 'in the picture' campaign on their website I think...

Dd is in a different category, as she has mobility problems but no other developmental problems, so she understands perfectly well what is going on. Also, she can remember a time before her disability got this bad, when she thought she would be able to do the same as everybody else. Most of the time she accepts it and is ok, but then there are times when it hits her, like this week when her little cousins were staying and she couldn't run around with them. It's not so bad with little brother, because he knows it and accepts it, as do her school friends, but having to explain (again and again) to a small child why you can't do what he can do does rub it home rather

I think it all goes to show how resiliant children are, and how accepting they are of their bodies - most of the time.

Sometimes my ds will get frustrated, but his determination to do something means he usually finds a way, albeit a different way.

My ds has never known his body to be any different, so he has always worked within his limitations. Cory, that must be very hard on your dd to have known better times for her.

Romy, it's fantastic that your dd can achieve what she wants, with lots of creative thinking. Interestingly, our physio mentioned to us recently that she went skiing in France, and she saw quite a few skiers with mobility problems, each skiing a different method (wheelchair, sledge etc) and realised how liberating that must be. It got me all excited. I never thought we could go skiing as a family. Not that we're particularly sporty...

Anyway, my worries about ds getting upset when seeing children doing activities, does seem only to upset me! I guess he accepts who he is for the moment. I wonder if he will need more tlc and support when he hits his teenage years?

jimjams, once when my dd got up to do some ballet dancing to show us, my ds tried to stand up to copy her. He just fell down, then sobbed and sobbed. It was heartbreaking for us all. But distraction soon got him smiling again, but I've never forgotten it.

Same when dd learned to walk, my ds tried to copy and failed. Lots of tears, until we realised it wasn't the walking that bothered him, it was all the attention on our dd! Once we gave him loads of praise for doing something else, he was fine.

twoisplenty, dd2 'learnt' to ballet dance with her walking frame, and we've now found a lovely ballet class that she can join in - at least for the time being - both the teacher and I know that when she 'moves up' in september it will be the last class that can accommodate her, but hopefully we will have found an sn class by that point...

our physio and OT department has an 'inspiration' board, where they collect photographs of the children they see achieving things that were never thought possible. It works as a 'brag' board for the children who turn up with their holiday photos (we tried surfing this year - with very little success but dd enjoyed it), and also so that parents who are starting out on the road can see that some of the things they have written off may be possible after all...

I'm pretty sure that further down the road dd2 is going to go through periods of frustration etc, and I guess we'll just have to deal with it when it happens...

still don't know how we're going to get round the skateboarding thing though...