Aa a parent to SEN children, what coping strategies do you use?

[Pebblypusscat]

Hi....I thought I'd share my coping strategies....both good bad and things I need to do but don't. If we all share odeas it could become a good resource?

Coping:

Antidepressants
A strong reading habit-escapism.
Gratitude.
DLA for the children.
Access cards with queueing and +1.
Gave up work and receive carers-means I can support my husband in his job whilst I manage the appointments, medication, support needs of the children.
Online food shop & delivery.
Talk to other SEN parents.
Have a counsellor 2x per month.

Less healthy strategies;
I comfort eat when struggling 😔

Thinhs that work but haven't had time for recently:
Daily walk
Gym 2×pw
Journalling-I do it but not regularly enough. Always helps.

What helped me:
couch to 5k
reducing contact with friends so I don’t feel obliged
Gratitude
joining a gym but just for the steam room and jacuzzi
Finding one hour to watch a program - hardly happens

Thank you @Lesley25

The friends thing is hard isnt it. Ive definitely lost a few friends who just have less compassion than I had imagined. I often feel lonely.

Anybody else?

I used to have ambition and drive, it has been eroded. Anyone else feel that way?

Laying down scrolling on tiktok and mumsnet 😭

Its so hot and the 6 weeks are almost here - i just need my comfort stuff

Love watching sitcoms as well

I work condensed hours so I get some time not working during school hours. Exercise really helps me clear my head - I go for a run straight after dropping her at school on those days.

Breakfast club for her as it's a soft start and easier transition into school - and means less stress in the morning for us as it's one less thing.
Access card +1, queuing and toilets!
Radar key.
Sertraline and Propranolol as needed for me.
Headspace meditation app.
Talking to my best friend who also has a child with SEN.

Therapist helped but I got to a point where I needed to unpack some deeper stuff and tbh I can't afford to risk letting those walls down right now. So I've parked therapy until the kids are a bit older.

@youreactinglikeafunmum @AnonymousMum37

Thanks for sharing

Yes...comfort stuff is good.

Well done on running Anon...that's meant to be amazing. Yes parking counselling sounds like a good idea for you for now.

I have two friends with SEN kids but I still feel so lonely.

I think I've got to focus on myself a bit. Not sure how.

I tried the 5 minute calm YouTube breathing , I find that has also really helped, just before sleep. It’s the breathing I think, helps the nervous system and can be used in times of stress.
i used to poo poo that sort of stuff but I was amazed at how much better and deeper I slept and since I only get a few hours it made a difference.
i forgot to say, no social media. I’m not in Facebook, any sort of thing, I would find that in the early days even hearing about what other people with NT lives was a trigger for sadness.

I avoid SM too @Lesley25

Oh yes I also try to attned a mental health choir when I can....this term has been tricky but I go as often as I can!

I have mostly good days of 'healthy' coping
Excercise- been weight training 3-4 times at home and this has been so beneficial for mind and body. Daily walk which I try so hard to prioritise.
Eating well.
Keeping on top of housework.
Setraline.
No social media.

I am dying to join a gym, will see how DC settle in September. Also what pp said about therapy and not being able to let those walls down very relatable! I started therapy but unloading currently is not ideal.

I got tempted after a tough weekend- I'm a few drinks down, have had a takeaway, and worrying about things beyond my control. Its so important to cope in the healthy ways so I do not end up going round in circles. New start tomorrow.

there is a really good charity that offers talking therapy - I think most do... that's the best to talk to someone that understands the struggle!