My 5 year old daughter was recently diagnosed with Autism. She seems to cope okay at school at the moment, it has taken her a very long time to settle in her class and we do have some meltdowns after school but on the whole I'm happy with how she is in school.
She is due to go on a school trip in a couple of weeks but she is refusing to go, she says she will only go if I go with her. I was reluctant to go with her at first but it has become apparent she is nervous about it so I agreed I would go along as long as her teachers were okay with it. I have spoken to her teachers a few times recently about it and they have said they don't need any more helpers for the trip, I explained I wanted to go to reassure and comfort my child but they said "it would be good for her to go without you" I left it over half term and my daughter bought it up to me again saying how she doesn't want to go without me.
I spoke to her teacher again thismorning and she said "it would be good for her to go without you to help build resilience. If you attend she will be less confident and likely cling to you. We see a confident side to her at school and having you there with her will hold her back. When you drop her at school she is quiet and then when you leave she is completely different"
I felt really sad and like it is my fault my daughter is the way she is and maybe I'm making it all up. There are 2 other boys in her class with an Autism diagnosis whose parents are allowed to attend with them as their needs present differently to my daughters and are much more apparent at school.
Does anyone have any advice? I don't want to push my daughter to go without me if she really isn't comfortable but I also don't want to hold her back if that's what I'm doing.