Hi @MrsBubble , this was me last year when my non-verbal DD was about to start nursery. I was really worried about how she would manage and how she would communicate her needs, but all the staff were really good with her and the SENCO was brilliant at getting lots of support put in place.
She was eligible for Early Years Inclusion Funding once she was eligible for the 30 hours funding, which was at the start of the next term. The funding was used to provide an enhanced ratio of 1:4 (as opposed to 1:8) so that she would have closer supervision and support. But they were already using an enhanced ratio for her even before they got additional funding for this.
She had a My Support Plan in place, Individual Support Plan, risk assessment, sensory profiles were completed by both home and nursery. At the home visit, maybe ask if the nursery will do similar?
The nursery used objects of reference, visual aids and sequence strips to aid her understanding of the different routines. At home, she is a strong communicator via hand-leading, but it took her a few months to non-verbally communicate at nursery as well as she does at home.
I'm not sure if your DS has sensory needs, but the nursery had a sensory basket for her to access throughout the day (contained sensory toys and comfort items etc). There was a period when she was upset at drop off and so her key person would meet her at the door with the sensory basket to aid the transition. I made her a little photo board book from Photobox which had family photos in, so she could look through this during the day (nursery put it in her sensory basket).
Maybe try showing your DS a photo of the nursery in the morning before you set off so he knows where you're going. We did this as my DD used to struggle with the transition when leaving home. Even now, sometimes she likes taking a toy/book in from home with her.
At home, DD struggles with sitting at the table during meal times. But at nursery, after a little while she was fine with sitting during mealtimes with extra support from staff. She didn't always eat much of the nursery meals, so I started sending in a packed lunch as a back up and this worked well.
I was really worried and sad when DD started, but the nursery were really supportive and nothing ever felt like too much trouble for them. Hopefully it will be the same for you. I started the EHCP process myself a few months after she started, doing it yourself (with support from nursery) means you have more control over the process. In my experience anyway.
She has now been diagnosed with ASD and been issued with an EHCP and is moving to a school nursery this week, so I am finding this unsettling again but feel reassured that she will be in good hands as both SENCOs have put a lot of effort in to easing the transition.
It's a huge worry and leap of faith, but hopefully the nursery will be really supportive and hopefully your DS will settle in well.