I’m getting quite anxious about this and would really welcome some advice / comments from other mumsnetters. My 2.5 year old DD goes to nursery full time and is happy there, has formed friendships and has gone from a young age.
Outside of nursery, she’s very bossy & demanding at home even though we do boundary set but with unfamiliar people she buries her face in our shoulders and refuses to look at them. She does and can warm up, but she’s never been an overly smiley child, although she does giggle and laugh - just not one who gazes into our faces and smiles on cue. I hate to admit to this, but I am starting to get embarrassed when she refuses to acknowledge people, say hello etc. once she’s warmed up she will usually wave goodbye.
I’ve read up on shyness and I don’t force interactions as it can make it worse, but I was wondering whether this coupled with the lack of returning smiles etc could be an early flag for asd? I know it’s harder to diagnose in girls. She can also get quite upset if routine isn’t kept to, but I know that can be an age thing too. She does hold eye contact sometimes but sometimes doesn’t like us looking at her (usually in the car after nursery / so she could be tired)
Things to mention she does do - very verbal / ahead on speech, engages in a lot of imaginary play, sleeps & eats very well, shares attention, gestures, affectionate and has friendships and seeks out other children in settings (although if it’s hectic eg. Busy soft play this can take a while)
Would be super grateful for the advice of others and if suspect shyness rather than asd how others have handled it sensitively. Nursery have said she’s really confident in their setting so don’t recognise this behaviour in her but it’s gone on for quite a long time. I’ve even had people comment on her having a grumpy face which is extremely triggering.
I have spoken to her gp and they pretty much ruled out screening for several years. I just want to make sure I can get her the best support she possibly needs - both at home and externally.