I think I need help with my mental health

[2stonez]

Hi

I’ve been going through some stress lately. Suspected ADHD and screened highly at a work related screening.

I get so angry and irritated very quickly. I lose my temper quickly and really try to hold it on but it feels like I need to lash out in the moment.

I’ve just had my youngest get diagnosed with ASD and whilst DC was pointing to signs, it still really upset me and felt so “final”.
I’ve been randomly breaking down into tears and I’m angry (at God) that my child has this.
Not because I love DC any less (my love is endless for DC) but the thought of how hard DC’s life will always be.

My family is saying I need to change my outlook, accept the diagnosis and focus on DC needs, but I’m just angry and upset in general.

Everything is making me angry and I just feel so alone even though I have everyone around me.

what do I do please help

Anyone please

It’s perfectly natural to feel this way after receiving your child’s diagnosis; it’s a kind of grief. Like grief, you will go through a process of acceptance and the things your family say you need to do will come in time. It’s easier for them as they are more detached.

Be kind to yourself. The future may not be how you thought it would be but that doesn’t mean it won’t still be good

And if you think it will help, pursue your own diagnosis. Lots of parents recognise that they are ND after a child is diagnosed.

Some find counselling helpful.

If it is something you would be interested in, Scope offer mentoring to parents of DC recently diagnosed.

Are you pursuing a referral for assessment yourself?

The SN boards are quieter than the main boards, so it sometimes takes longer to get replies.

Just wanted to speak up in solidarity. My son is still awaiting diagnosis for ASD but every sign is there and the writing is on the wall. I’m struggling with waves of anger and a sense of unfairness - why has every other family around me had ‘NT’ children whilst we must deal with this. Our son is beautiful and has taught me so many things about myself, but his difference is plain to see and I am struggling to accept this. I think this is about me and my need to fit in. I am finding therapy helps me vent these feelings and work through them. It helps to think this is all part of my journey to acceptance. But yeah, it’s hard!

Sorry, also just to say, you can’t focus on your child’s needs if you feel like you do. Your oxygen mask has slipped and needs fitting back on before you can attend to others! So focus on that: helping yourself. Be that through a heart to heart with a good friend, a walk on your own or some professional counselling. Hugs x

@Forsoothmylord this is EXACTLY how I feel. That it’s unfair. I’m angry and keep thinking, why my beautiful baby. Yes I know ASD children are beautiful in their own way but I’m still so sad. It’s especially hard when seeing DCs peers who are very aware of their environment and speaking in full sentences. Hugs to you too x