Question and catch up

[fannysparkle]

I haven't posted much for a while but i have been around, I have changed my name recently btw i was 'monkeypie' but got fed up with it.

Ds has assessment in just over 3 weeks time and i just recieved letter from child development centre saying there will be a social worker visiting us before the assessment. Is this normal then? I just don't really understand what she can say/ask that hasn't already been said/asked.

Also just wanted to mention i read in a recent thread that having a love of logos and watching the titles after a programme has finished is a trait of asd, i had no idea. DS loves the titles he goes up to the tv and puts hands on them as they move. Even when we go to tesco he has to be allowed to feel the big advert boards, the ones which roll and change ads.

I am just amazed at how nearly every day he does something new and one part of his routine will change every few days. He has started to touch a certain part of the sofa as he goes past and has just started to stroke my hair too, but in a pattern kind of way iykwim.

He starts nursery on Thursday and i am so worried that because he will have only been going for 2 weeks before assessment and it's only 2 + 1/2 hours a day that they will not see him at his worst and won't back me up on getting a dx. I'm probably worrying about nothing as usual, it just seems the closer the assessment day gets (even though i have been praying for it to hurry up and be here)the more i worry about everything!!

I'm especially starting to doubt about if i have made a big deal of nothing. Family seem to think i have but they don't live with us 24/7 and there's alot they don't see.

One last thing, i got a bloody info sheet throught the post today from NHS listing all the things my 3 yr old should be doing now (like i need to read that), telliing me we will be offered an eye exam soon (he has wore glasses since 1yr old) and that his pre school booster will be due at 4yrs (no it bloody well won't be cause he's not having it!) I know they go out automatically but it didn't help my mood.

Does it show that i am a little highly strung atm!?

my DS is a logo boy too! He also cycles through obsessions so one thing won't last all that long - so for instance, one week he will be obsessed with water play and the next it will be something else. I did have a special needs social worker involved with DS when I first started the assessement process, but it was more about assessing for respite care (or that's what they said). It can actually be quite useful as I think they are the only ones who can refer you for respite care and SEN babysitting services. Everyone was always telling me I was over the top about DS's problems but he was clearly not developing like other kids and the older he got the more obvious that is - it still surprises me how sophisticated language is in children even as early as 2. I think it's easier for family to focus on you, the mum, than to face head-on the fact that there might be problems with the child. Trust your instincts and good luck!

IME the pros will base their decisions on what they can see for themselves rather than place a lot of importance on what the nursery says. FWIW for a long time ds2's pre-school thought he was fine. It was only when things went very wrong very quickly that they saw it for themselves and said "Ah now we see what you mean."

It's very common for family to just not see it. I think mine still don't see my two boys' ASD. Even when ds1 clearly had all the traits of autism and was non-verbal, unresponsive etc they still couldn't wouldn't see it. You know your ds far better than your family do so don't let them make you feel like you're over-reacting.

We had some of those 'helpful' info sheets through the post too. I think there was also a leaflet about healthy eating in there too - not helpful when ds2 was existing on bread and milk at the time.

We haven't seen any social workers, but different areas seem to have different systems so I don't know how common that is.

Good luck.

Thanks for the replies and amam i have had to learn to trust my instincts as i can't ask advice from anyone i know, only on here. The changes in rountine or should i say tweaks to rountine are so subtle sometimes it's takes a few days before i even notice. Ds used to do verbal stimming very badly 2 weeks ago and it was mostly at breakfast time, now i hardly hear it from him.

Coppertop i was thinking of sending him to nursery on a diet of cola and chocolate just to see how they cope when he is hyper but i couldn't do it to him....I'll save it for the assessment instead Only kidding.

My 3yr old is on a 6-8wk autism assessment programme of weekly 90min play sessions, rather than one single session. I'm back in that 'no idea' state about whether he is or he isn't, have no idea if he'll get a DX or not. If he doesn't, I'll still kind of treat him as if he does, because learning about ASD and AS made so much sense and has helped me to understand him and not take his behaviour quite so personally.

Yes i know how you feel Buckets and i will probably do the same because them telling me that ds does not have asd will not mean he will change the way he is and i know there is something wrong. The only thing is that without the DX i won't get a 1-1 help for Ds in nursery or help financially.

I just never feel the same about whether i think he is/isn't from hour to hour, it drives you crazy that's why i can't for asessment to be over. Goodluck with your ds.

You never know, we met Ed Psych last week and she's going to recommend DS for an inclusive place at his pre-school (he starts in Sep), with or without a DX. She says he's not got many issues but unless there's a sudden glut of worse kids arrive in the area he should be able to get the extra help that an inclusive place provides.
LOL, our assessment has now stopped for Easter break which is infuriating. He really enjoys it there!

Well my gorgeous DS has finally started nursery and he had a ball!
Not sure i can say the same for the teachers, i think they are earning their wages! lol

Both days he has been, when i arrive to pick him up all the other children are sat crossed legged on the carpet waiting patiently and ds has been over the other side of classroom playing with water/sand tray and a teaching ass by his side. So i guess that's good as when assessment comes round (2 weeks on thursday) they can't say he doesn't need 1 to 1.

Anyway just wanted to say i am happy for the first time in ages as i wasn't sure how he would be with nursey and so far so good!

LOL, it's always nice to see them being hard work for others, just reminds you it's not your parenting skills or all in your imagination . Good luck with the assessment.

Thanks Buckets!