School refusal

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DS is 10, recently diagnosed ADHD and also has Autism. He's on week 5 of Medikinet-we've noticed vast improvements in his general mental health and physical well-being even after meds wear off.
He hasn't enjoyed school for the past 2 years. He masks heavily and he's pretty burnt out, I think. Started refusing last Autumn. Long story short, it all settled with a few accommodations in school and LOTS of low demand parenting and all boundaries around screentime removed. Since medication started he appears to have found a new lease of life-we're delighted! However, school appears to be getting MORE difficult.
He has new teachers this year (jobshare). Now he's refusing school when one of these teachers is on. Backstory-school have only recently had any 'issues' with DS-his IEP was v basic-he was supposed to be able to use screens on arriving/leave class (unsupervised) if he felt he needed a break, use fidgets if necessary. When he was diagnosed school didn't feel the need to update his IEP. At his Jan PT meeting his teacher advised he's not attaining-he's smart and his scores are just above avg. She said he's easily distracted, talks too much, distracts others. After this I requested a meeting to update his IEP. It was agreed -they now DO see that he needs some support. He's also clashing with one of his teachers -'defiant' apparently. (Autistic methinks ; when he tries to explain what he's doing he's told off for 'answering back'). He possibly has masked less in school, he's been told to sop fidgeting, eg.
Teachers are not coming to the meeting. SENCO and Head are meeting us. I'm at a loss re what to expect/ask for in terms of meeting DS needs. It's clear to me that he's struggling and very stressed regarding school. He doesn't know what the needs; he can tell me stories about why the teacher makes him anxious -eg telling other ND children off. I think DS then feels he needs to control the environment and this is exhausting him.
Sorry for the ramble...help!!!

Have you requested an EHCNA? If not, you should make the request yourself. IPSEA has a model letter you can use.

Has the school tried PDA strategies? Have they looked at providing movement breaks and sensory circuits? Have they consider whether a standing desk, bands on DS’s chair, wobble cushion, specialist rocking chair or sitting on an exercise ball would help? Do they have anyone who can support emotional literacy/Zones of Regulation work? Have they considered DS’s placement within the classroom? Do they have a nurture group?

Is DS in Y5 or Y6? If Y6 then the primary need to be liaising with the secondary. You should also contact them. If Y5, since we are approaching the end of the year they could also consider the personalities/experience/understanding of staff (and schools if the school isn’t single form entry) when allocating classes next year.

In the meantime, if DS can’t attend school full-time, is alternative provision being made?

Thank you so much....I very strongly suspect DS is PDA but it isn't diagnosed here. I also feel he 'can't' not 'won't'; I truly believe he finds certain environments oppressive and anxiety provoking. I have sent in womb;e cushion, elastic bands. He uses the bands. The problem is he seems almost afraid to move/fidget. So he refuses earphones (even Loop), wobble/stool etc etc. If he's being told off for using Comfa fidget clothing then I'm not really surprised TBH. He's fine with 1 of his teachers, really not fine with the other. Definite issues with problem teacher calling out other SN kids and DS for not sitting still to talking/not focusing. Worried about bringing this up with SENCO, know DS has decided he does not like/trust this teacher and that's part of the issue.....

DS doesn’t need to have a PDA diagnosis for the school to try some strategies.

It is not surprising DS is anxious about being told off for something that is related to his disability if he already has been. The schools needs to work to rebuild trust and it may be that the relationship with the one teacher can never be built. If DS is like mine I have a DC who you only get one chance with.