DS is 7, autistic and adhd. He is in a mainstream school and has an EHCP. He is in pull ups and has an intimate care plan. He has an issue with his bowels and can't feel anything properly, this is hampered by quite extreme anxiety about it all. We are baby stepping the steps towards him feeling his body cues and toilet training. He literally can't feel it.
At the moment there is a plan of big drink (a cup) and a toilet sit 30 minutes later, all fine, or so I thought. At school this is 4-5 times during the day.
Thursday I drop him off, unbeknownst to me school have completely changed his plan. They took him to the toilet every 20 minutes for 5 minute sits. He spent well over 90 minutes on the toilet in 15 separate sits. He had zero success and still wet himself 4 times in between sits.
I'm really very upset with school, this was done without telling me let alone discussing it with me. DS certainly wasn't warned or prepared. He was understandably distraught at pick up. School have taken it as a "of course he isn't going to like us trying to break the habit", which immediately screams to me that they have no understanding what so ever of the actual issue for him.
I approached them about it and they clearly haven't clocked its an issue.
I want to raise it more formally, not necessarily a complaint but a firmer "this isn't okay" communication.
My views are that this should have been discussed with me, I wouldn't have allowed this plan but when they decided on a plan they should have at least prepared him.
My question now is:
- Should this be something that requires consent? It isn't an adjustment to fit in with school timings, which I'm generally easy going about, but to me it's a complete change in care plan.
- Can I ask them to provide me the medical advice that they sought to decide upon this approach? I know his continence nurse certainly hadn't advised it.