Ados tomorrow what to expect

[Applesandbananasandpears]

My 8yo son has his ados tomorrow. Paediatrician thinks he is autistic. I’m inclined to agree.

he has had a lot of input from various professionals the past twelve months including camhs after an incident of supposed attempted self harm
at school. I say supposed because he didn’t actually hurt himself and I don’t believe he intended to. He hates school and will often say very provocative things at school which get a huge reaction from the adults there such as I wish I was dead. Camhs discharged him immediately as no evidence of any depression or suicidal ideation. He’s the happiest child ever at home; he just hates school. Semh professionals have seen him at school and say he has anxiety and demand avoidance around school work.

anyway, I’m not allowed to go in to the ados with him and the letter says it can take up to an hour. I’m wondering what he can expect so I can prepare him for it. When he has been to certain appointments this past year he has said some very provocative things relating to wishing he was dead because there’s no school in heaven etc but I honestly believe he just knows that such comments get a reaction. I have told him it’s a routine check up and his older sibling has backed me up saying oh yeh I remember my eight year old check etc because I wondered if he might avoid the provocative statements if he thought this had no relation to his camhs appointment and the incident of self harm.

i probably sound dismissive of his problems; I’m not. Something is very clearly different about my son but I’m certain (as is gp, camhs) that it isn’t depression or suicidal ideation. He has many hallmarks of autism though. I’m just wondering what if anything I can tell him that will get the best most genuine “performance” from him at ados so he is his genuine self and they make a judgment that’s accurate.

This gives some jnfo

https://www.cambscommunityservices.nhs.uk/beds-luton-community-paediatrics/ados-assessments. But hopefully someone with experience can tell you more.

I wouldn’t prepare DS for the specific tasks. It is much more helpful if the HCPs can see DS’s true responses. Instead, I would tell DS is it about looking at how you and others can help him.

I think I phrased it badly I don’t mean prepare him like you’d revise before an exam. I’m not worried about him “getting things right” so to speak. I mean to prepare him in the sense of knowing what might happen. Will the lady just chat to him, play a few games, give him puzzles etc

That is what I meant, I wouldn’t prepare him by telling him what tasks e.g. the puzzle will happen.

Would you tell him the purpose of the assessment? I’ve just said a check up. We haven’t yet discussed autism with him

I would tell him it is an appointment which will help you and others help him with the things he hates (or struggles with - depending on what you think would work best for DS).

Unless you think he would cope with knowing it was an autism assessment, but I get the impression you don’t?