One of my best friends has a neurodiverse child (X, 10yo) who is very good friends with my DS1 (10yo). However, X is absolutely hideous to my DS2 (8yo) snatching anything he has from him, calling him names and physically hurting him. Any time we see then it ends up with DS2 curled up on my lap sobbing.
DS2 tries really hard to be kind and understanding and tries to play elsewhere to avoid trouble but recently X seems to seek DS2 out to deliberately upset him.
I have limited the time that we all meet up as much as I can but we all attend the same church so meet there almost every week. All the children normally play together after the service which DS1 and DS3 enjoy and DS2 also likes when he can avoid X. I don't want to effectively punish my children by taking away time they enjoy but I need to do something to protect DS2.
I generally find that X's parents are very unhelpful about this. Dad just ignores it and Mum mutters a totally ineffectual "now X love that's not very nice" and then does nothing. I know that X's Mum finds his behaviour very challenging and she has a lot of anxiety around how people perceive him and being a church environment there are some old people who firmly believe all children should be seen and not heard and will happily tell X's mum disgraceful his behaviour is. (There are also lots of lovely people who are really supportive but somehow it's always the few horrible people that stand out)
Any helpful advice appreciated!