I have concerns over the behaviour of my 8 year old daughter and have for a few years, but hoped she’d grow out of some of it. It doesn’t seem to be happening though and she’s really tough to be around.
She is very head strong and stubborn, won’t be told and doesn’t seem to learn from past mistakes etc. For example, if you tell her not to do something like hold her drink upside down in case the lid comes off she will insist that it won’t and then inevitably it does and goes everywhere. She will then cry but will do the same thing next time around.
She is extremely fussy with food and will gag and spit out the most innocuous things ( on the rare occasions she will even try new things). She won’t even eat chips unless they are French fries etc. She is obsessed with snacking though and constantly claiming to be “starving” to get something. She goes so far as to sneak food if told no. I’m always finding wrappers hidden places, bowls shoved at the back of cupboards etc where she’s taken food she knows she shouldn’t. She will eat entire packets of things, steal her siblings treats etc not caring that it ends with her being told off. She will insist it wasn’t her if asked and then end up sobbing but again, she doesn’t learn and does the same thing next opportunity. I have to hide any snack items in strange places.
She also whines a lot, throws strops if everything doesn’t go her way or isn’t done immediately. Cries at the drop of a hat. She is extremely confident but doesn’t have many friends. She has one friend that she has made the centre of her world almost and will say that she doesn’t need any other friends. This inevitably ends with my daughter being alone when the other friend spends time with her other friends. However, I can see why she isn’t particularly liked by her peers as she can be quite rude, will tell kids that she is better than them at x y z.
She goes to a kids social club and I can tell the leader is desperate to get rid of her. If she deems the activity that day to be “boring” she just won’t join in and will sit there and do her own thing. This causes disruption as then other kids want to follow her lead etc.
Other points of concern are that she can be very fussy over clothes and things “ not feeling good” or just not being right. She can’t seem to sit/ stand still and has to be moving or fiddling constantly. Her room is always a mess, she loses and breaks things a lot.
She isn’t all bad and is very bright, extremely funny, great at singing and acting, can be kind ( if she gets sweets she will always make sure that her siblings get the same or will share hers. (Ironic since she will end up stealing them back if she eats hers faster!), can be sweet and sensitive at times. I just don’t know whether there is maybe something else going on with her or if she is just a difficult, maybe not always very nice child?