sensitive/pc questions re downs symdrome

[jollymum]

please help if your child hasD/s. My littlest one is 6 and i have worked with sn kids for6 years or so. however, he is the first one to ask why ...his friend at school makes funny noises/wears nappies etc and i don't know really khow to answer without being sickly sweet/patronising or competely wrong in my approach. I haven't asked the child's mum, who i do know well enough to, but i wanted your opinions first, please. How would you answer my child asking questions about your child?

I haven't really had to deal with this yet. My dd is 3 and has DS. I also have a ds who is now 5. Right from the word go I have tried to be open with him about his sister. I have told him that she was born with something called DS, which can make it more difficult to do some things other children find quite easy. Because of this she may need extra help and support. I have said this simple to help him understand the hospital appointments, extra home visits..etc.
He still doesn't really understand DS, but he is a very sensible and sensitive little boy who loves his little sister for who she is. He doesn't need to think any different and I hope that when dd starts school, others too can just accept her for who she is- all children are different.
You may not have to explain much anyway, why don't you start off with just saying something like...X may need to learn that still.
Any disability can be tricky to explain, but I feel that as long as you choose you words carefully and be positive, your ds will just accept it, say ooh,,,OK and off he'll go.
Good luck jollymum and thank you for taking the time to think about how others may feel before jumping in head first.

hi jollymum, thank you for asking. :) My child with DS is 3, her big sister is 5. We've always been very open with dd1 regarding dd2's DS (without ramming it down her throat!) and the simplest, truest way of explaining it, in my opinion, is to explain that children with DS take longer to learn things and that they will get there, but that it takes them longer. And that everything is more difficult for them so they work extra hard. As for explaining the DS, we say that dd2 was born with it and is part of her, it's something she'll always have just like she'll always be a girl/woman rather than a boy, and that it is not something dd1 or ds will ever have or 'catch'.

I've got \link{http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0750228393/qid=1102747650/ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i1_xgl/026-6508366-7727638\Living with DS} which is a very good book and would be suitable for a six year old. It also goes into the genetics of DS in an easy-to-understand way.

Hope this helps! :)