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Very slow cognitive and motor processing - ADHD/Autism

4 replies

bakfietsmama · 02/06/2023 08:37

Does anyone have any experience of extremely physically slow, day dreamy boys?

we're really struggling with my eldest son (10). We live abroad and he attends a school in the local language. It is a Montessori school (for context, the teaching approach is entirely self led). Teachers are now recommending we seek a diagnosis for him, they're thinking autism and/or ADHD.

His inability to concentrate and work has always been a problem, but his symptoms are on the slow spectrum. He is exceptionally slow at everything; getting dressed, eating, walking (always very cautious).
He will do his work and get everything correct but only complete part of it in the allotted time, so of course his grades are low.

Teachers said he was 'untestable' and requested an IQ test when he was 8 which came back as fairly high at 138 (however, this test was done in Dutch and he didn't speak much at the time, so I suspect he might do better in an English IQ test!)

He is a very kind, sensitive, polite boy and he has always been so gentle and chilled out, which is great socially of course. He has a small group of friends; he's a very good gamer/coder so he's popular in that field but he will often remove himself from groups if its too busy/loud eg. at parties.

I think it's pretty obvious that he has a form of autism. His dad has diagnosed ADHD and most likely Autistic too (but not diagnosed!) and I have a lot of autistic traits, but of course being female in the 90s doesn't get you much help there...

Just had his end of year report which states that he does no work and daydreams almost constantly and cannot progress to high school. Really annoyed to learn that the only schools that provide adequate support for children with learning differences is within the lowest level of secondary education. Like they're just being written off because they can't 'perform' 😡

looking forward to finally seeking a diagnosis and get some help. Would be great to hear from anyone else who has quirky, spaced out boys!

OP posts:
PinkMimosa · 02/06/2023 09:15

My DS has just been diagnosed with mainly inattentive ADHD. It does sound as though an assessment and some ADHD meds might help him. Does his Df take any meds?

bakfietsmama · 02/06/2023 11:29

his father self medicates with coffee and chocolate... not that he even recognises his excessive consumption as self medicating!
I hope a diagnosis will help in setting a better example in working behaviours.

oooh, inattentive adhd rings very true indeed.
It's a battle not to get annoyed with the spaciness. If I rush my son he instantly gets very upset.

OP posts:
PinkMimosa · 02/06/2023 11:58

It's a battle not to get annoyed with the spaciness. If I rush my son he instantly gets very upset

Would working with the Dopamine help with this? So things like "I'm going to put a timer on, let's see how much of your Maths homework you can do in 15 minutes!".

Fififizz · 02/06/2023 13:01

Sometimes ND kids really struggle if they’re just not interested in the task. It makes doing the mundane stuff very difficult for them. Does he show a different level of engagement when he’s doing something he’s really interested in?

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