ADHD - if your child had support in primary school what made a difference

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My ds is 6, in year 1, and is on the SEND register at school. In particular he is struggling with friendships, behaviour and independent work, and presents as emotionally young for his age. School are saying that they have no concerns with his academics but I can see that he isn't anywhere near meeting his potential. I strongly suspect that he has either ADD or ADHD and have a private appointment for diagnosis/screening in July and school have suggested an educational psychologist assessment which would be in the autumn term at the earliest. School are saying that he doesn't meet the threshold for an EHCP and I'm going to wait until after he's had those assessments before discussing any further.

The gap between him and his peers feels like it is growing, and he is feeling upset about his behaviour in school but struggling to control it, so I think that early intervention here will be a huge help irrespective of diagnosis. Luckily I'm in a position to afford to pay for some stuff independently. He has been having play therapy - 24 sessions which have just come to an end - these have been good and which I'm going to rebook for next year. School have offered lego club to follow the end of the play therapy. I've been doing a bit of reading and outside school I'm also trying to increase the exercise he does, have booked him into a martial arts club, and am giving fish oil supplements.

Does anyone have any suggestions of what has worked well for your child? Anything which you look back on and think was very useful? I feel comfortable pushing school for more help, but its hard to know what extra help will work!

Thank you so much.

Apply for an EHCNA yourself. Unfortunately schools often incorrectly tell parents their DC won’t get or don’t need an EHCP but the parents go on to successfully apply themselves.

The school could provide emotional literacy support, many have someone who can support Zones of Regulation work. Have they looked at movement breaks, placement within the classroom, tried a wobble cushion, sensory circuits? Are they providing support with social situations/friendships? Do they have someone who can deliver interventions such as drawing and talking or similar? 1:1 may help but without an EHCP long term 1:1 is unlikely.

Hi @FloatingBean

Thank you so much for reading through my long post and for doing such a thoughtful reply.

I hadn't heard of the zones of regulation but I've just had a google and they look like they would be really helpful for DS. I'll definitely ask about that. Do you know if that's something which the school would run or someone external?

I'll have a try of sensory circuits and wobble cushion at home I think and recommend them to school if they seem to work. Those are good suggestions thank you.

They haven't tried movement breaks although I have suggested that (he has PE and hockey on the same day at school and that day seems to get the least incidents so I do think it would work well). I'd love to see them getting him out on the running track every morning but I think that's too tricky for them without a 1-2-1.

I would like to see more support in place for the social situations/friendships, and this is the area which DS finds upsetting so there's a big value in that. He has some additional support in place at playtime and when they're on the carpet. Is there an external intervention which I could put in place privately to support with this? I'd wondered about SALT for communication (his speech and language are fine) but I don't know whether that would help? Or if there is something more ADHD focused?

They can't provide 1-2-1 without an EHCP and I don't think I'd get the EHCP without a diagnosis even applying as a parent. But, assuming we get a diagnosis I will probably follow your advice and apply myself if school are still reluctant once we have the diagnosis. The play therapy he's currently doing is not dis-similar to a talking/drawing therapy and is definitely making a difference.

Thank you so much for reading and supporting - I feel a bit lost with all of this and its hard to know what to push for so your suggestions have been really helpful.

A diagnosis isn’t required for an EHCP, they are based on needs, not diagnosis. In meantime if the school need more funding to provide additional support they can apply for high needs top up funding.

Many schools have someone internal who can support Zones of Regulation work. You could suggest the daily mile for the whole class. Even if sensory circuits and a wobble cushion don’t work at home they, or other support for sensory needs, may be worth trying at school because sometimes support works differently in different settings. SALT could help, it is about far more than the physical ability to speak. OT could help too. If you have a forest school or nurture group that could help.

Thank you so much - that is really helpful - I'm noting it down and going to take some of those suggestions in for the next meeting with school!

School absolutely can and should be doing more. My youngest is year 1 and struggles with communication, social skills and attention. She doesn't have a diagnosis yet- on waiting list for neurodevelopmental assessment. School applied for SEND intervention funding and she has a 1-1 in the morning. School have funded the 1-1 in the afternoon themselves as well as private SALT and she had a course of OT intervention too. School provide sensory breaks throughout the day for her. This doesn't even need a 1-1, there are things they could do in the classroom