Dealing with Outbursts

[purpleme12]

How should I deal with Outbursts??
I mean where she makes a lot of noise, gets angry, aggressive, insults me and disrespects me.
She has trouble controlling her emotions.
I stay calm. Mainly because the other way doesn't work.
Has anyone managed to stop these? Stop their child disrespecting when they're in these angry states?
I don't know what to do 😢

DD doesn’t need a diagnosis to access support. The disabled children’s team can look at providing more support.

I’m confused as to why you don’t think you are a carer?

Because I'm just a normal parent and she's not that bad compared to other children

But you are providing care for a child with additional needs, therefore you are a parent carer.

Would this disabled team be better than Early Help team?

In my opinion, yes. You need more support than early help can provide. On their websites Contact have a model letter you can use.

So maybe yesterday when it all started kicking off because she wanted to watch another episode but it was bedtime,
Was it that the transition that was the problem?
Because she was enjoying watching the programme and she didn't want to go to bed?

Not that I'd say that we have this problem all the time when going on to do the next things...

It may have been the transition. But there are a number of other possible factors. For example, it could also have been the demand, or already being in a heightened state for which she was using the tv to self regulate, or if DD has difficulties sleeping it may have been about that, or if the programme was about DD’s interests it could have been due to difficulties related to not focusing on that, or it could have had absolutely nothing to do with the TV as what appears to be the trigger isn’t always.

Ok how do we know which exactly is the trigger?
Just carrying on making notes?
I'm just confused how we'd find out?

It is sometimes the 'demands' (not that I'm always demanding something lol)

She does love Tele. I guess perhaps she uses it to self regulate? I don't know how to know that

If demands are sometimes the issue have a look at PDA strategies, the PDA society have some helpful information.

Keeping a detailed diary and using ABC charts will help spot triggers.

Thank you this has made me consider things I haven't before and I think I will take on board this diary and ABC thing.
It's really hard to see the wood for the trees sometimes

I don't have many people I can talk to in real life about it.
Not people who understand and see