Just wondered if anyone might have come across a clothing phobia!

[macwoozy]

This isn't really a significant problem but it has baffled me and baffled ds's school (who has much experience of SN's)

Basically it seems ds has a genuine fear of changing into his P.E kit at school. His OTT reaction to anyone asking him to change into his PE kit has meant that he hasn't had to do PE for the last 4 months. But now, the school have said that PE is on the curriculum and that he has to do it. Fair enough.

His LSA is even going to make the effort to change into a PE kit before games so as to encourage him, and the school have also been showing pictures of people doing sporting activities with their kit on, in the hope he can understand why a PE kit is worn.

He's adamant that he won't wear it. He became hysterical when I encouraged him to wear the kit underneath his school clothes. But he has no worries about getting unchanged with his dad for swimming.
So I just don't get it. Any ideas?

could there be a sensory issue with the material in the PE kit? would he (and the school) be OK with changing into a pair of trackie bottoms and t-shirt of his choice?

maybe its the specific kit in question... does it have to be a certain colour etc? can you take him to choose a new kit that he may approve of?

It's not sensory(I originally thought of that but his kit is very smooth to wear, with no labels).

The head suggested he wear a tracksuit over the top of his PE kit(it's a no uniform school) but he just freaked out with the thought of wearing a PE kit.

Yes, the PE kit is the only required outfit at this school, so it is a certain colour. I tried to encourage him to wear the kit in the evening, but as soon as I mention it him he becomes hysterical. His LSA has said she can't even mention 'PE' without him getting highly stressed.

ouch.
how well does he communicate?
is there some way you can open a dialogue about what it is about it the bothers him in an entirely nonthreatening place/way? so he knows that just coz youre talking about it, youre not going to suggest he do it that moment... maybe he wont fly off the handle so fast? and give you a chance to explore the topic with him?

its really difficult now hes so wound up about it i guess... but there must be some reason behind it

Hi, sorry if this sounds stupid, but it maybe he hates the actual P.E lesson rather than the kit. Maybe he has come to associate the pe kit with a hated activity.

IS it the PE kit or is it the PE itself (which he's associating with the kit) - oh deeja just said that.

If its something surrounding the changing etc can he not just do PE in his normal clothes - or just swap to any old t-shirt .

If it' s the PE itself I think forget the kit and get him joining with his own clothes in for a minute initially (then allowing him to request either a break - and return, or to leave depending on how strong the aversion is) then build up. Once you've dealt with the PE aversion the kit issue might sort itself out.

Has the school tried letting him do PE without the kit-or are they prepared to let him do so in the circumstances? (They obviously need to be a bit flexible and bend normal rules as it would help you to get to the bottom of what his fear actually is).

Initially I presumed that he didn't want to change into PE kit due to his dislike of the PE itself, but in the last few weeks he's being doing PE with his LSA(without the class present) and he's been fine with that, although his LSA did say that she doesn't actually tell him it's a PE lesson because of the way he reacts. It's strange, he'll do PE(although not ready to do it with the other kids yet)but seems to have a genuine fear of getting changed for it.

The school (and especially the LSA) are brilliant and are not pushing him, but my ds is incredibly stubborn so I'm not so hopeful that he'll ever agree to getting changed.

When I ask him he just says he has a problem with it, but won't offer any more information. It is baffling.

I was also wondering if there is something about doing PE he doesn't like, rather than the clothes. Did something happen last time he did PE, do the clothes fit okay and are comfy and warm enough?

Yeh clothes fit well, and he's got a trackie type top to go over it if he gets cold. I'm not aware of any particular incidents that might have worried him enough to get him in this sort of state.

Does he have issues with reconciling himself to wearing clothes in a situation he isn't happy with/approving of? DS1 is just coming through a huge phase where he wouldn't let anyone wear anything like a shirt, cardi or trackie top in the house. If it had fasteners, it was a coat as far as he was concerned and had to come off and he'd tear at it and cry until it came off. He still wrestles everyone's socks off their feet, given half a chance. I can't even do something like put jammie bottoms on him to lounge around the house before his bathtime, because they're the wrong clothes at the wrong time.

Ds wont change unless he is taken to his safe room.

he will not wear socks at all ( i have to get trainer socks and place them inside hsi shoes before putting them on in the morning so he doesn't realise. its tres difficult but i have now almost mastered it. it does mean that he never wears socks home on the days he has PE though.

before they had teh safe room they allowed DS to participate in PE with his usual school clothes on. the idea being he would enjoy it and want to join in and therefore be willing to get changed...didnt work but may be worth a go

ouryve, my ds does have some issues with wearing the 'wrong' clothes, but not as strong as your ds. He won't wear costumes etc at school, he was aghast with the idea of wearing strange clothes for Victorian day, but that's about as far as it goes really.
Mamazon, the school will allow him to get undressed privately but still he's not going to be persuaded. They mentioned that they'll just start with shoes and socks and take it slowly. They do allow him to wear his usual clothes so he's not missing out. I just wish he could explain why it's such a big deal for him.