Aspergers and school

[Sohox]

I've not been on MN for years, not since I moved house about 4 years ago... I'm in desperate need of some advice about my ds(aged 5) he is just not like other boys his age, infact he never has been.

I'm very concerned that he isn't "fitting in" at school. He seems to be finding this year more difficult than last, I mentioned to his class teacher that I thought he was finding this year hard to deal with and that I thought he possibly had aspergers and she hadn't got a clue, she said that she'd have to talk to the senco. His classroom assistant agreed with me that she thought he had aspergers.

How long will it take for him to get the understanding and support he now desperatly needs?

I had to goo to a child pshychiatrist to finally get an answer for my son who has High function Autism? they say but who we thought had Aspergers, Ihave been told its more or less the same

Anyway we went through school first but we didnt have much joy so I booked an appointment at the GP and went to someone she refered to at CAMHS he was wonderful and from getting an appointment it took 3 months to get a diagnosis

I would recommend doing it this way because going through school had taken 4 years of fighting, pushing and general pleading on my part and being bullied alot in the case of my son

My son now goes to a different school and we moved back home to be nearer to family he is getting on great at school within his limits and has made a friend quite quickly

Once you have a diagnosis it all seems so much easier to deal with because you can temeper what you say with the way he will understand it

sorry this is rushed and garbled I am off to dake DS2 to nursery

My Email is sam wilkins 1 @ msn.com (no spaces) if you need to chat

good luck

It all seems to depend on the school. I have been very lucky with mine. I have my niggly things with DD and AS, didn't mention my concerns to school to start with, but then we had a meltdown over her book changing without warning, so I went and spoke to them. They were great, asked what I was doing my end, asked what her main issues were and how they were best avoiding them/dealing with them (change tends to be her only problem at school, so it was an easy one - don't do anything without warning her!)

Reading the various threads on here, it does seem that some schools are useless without a fight, and a doctor backing you up.

So, my main thing i would say is - go to the GP. Get things rolling there. Go back to his teacher and tell her not so much about AS, but about what YOUR son needs. Most schools have family liason (or some other similar title) - it could be worth seeing them, they can help mediate everything and tell thems that need to know etc.

I would go the GP and not rely on the school - there is an inherent conflict of interest with the school trying to get help for your DS, as the school is subject to the LEA and the LEA wants to save money above all things! Some schools are nicer than others of course, but in the end I think it's down to you to get things moving by seeing a GP and also you can request an assessement for a statement of special needs if the GP referral comes up with anything. It can takes ages to get an assessment though - but if you have money or if you have BUPA, Dr Daphne Keen will give you a private diagnosis far quicker. She is a senior autism paediatrician at St George's Hospital Tooting, but also does private work. We got a diagnosis much quicker that way, which also got us through the system much quicker. You may not get a statement for aspergers if it is just mild, but even if you get School ACtion Plus it will mean some help and understanding for your DS. Good luck!

Same as t'other 3 - go through your GP and Camhs. School said DS was naughty; but I knew it was more confusion than anything else. Camhs were great - reassuring and quick to get to diagnosis. It seems very hard to get a statement without school's full backing though - it helps if they are in agreement with you.

Thank you to everyone who has replied. I knew that I could rely on MN when all my real life friends were at a loss as to how they could help.

Just knowing that there really are other people out there who have not only been there but also got out the other side really helps.

I'm going in for a meeting with their senco tomorrow after school.

If I have to then I'll go through the BUPA route but his father would rather he wasn't labeled, which is easy for him to say as he doesn't actually live with us, as DS is covered through his health care insurance then getting things moving will take some pressure on my part.