Help, cant cope with DS outbursts at meal times and nappy time

[runikka]

Help

Feeling really really down at the moment as havent coped really well with Daniel's meltdowns today.

DH is away at the moment to visit relatives abroad. I am at home with DS (ASD) and DD.
We recently moved house and I have been trying to do little jobs round the house which has obviously put DS out a little bit.

We had a new wardrobe delivered for him today which I employed someone to build (we have so many other things to do). This meant i had to change Daniel's nappy downstairs and he went balistic and really started screaming lashing out. I am afraid to say I completely lost it with him and smacked his leg (something I am deeply ashamed of). It left a mark and I do not know who was the more upset. Anyway, I sat and cuddled hiim for ages and he finally dozed off (another factor missing his nap whilst his wardrobe was being built).

Dinnertime has just arrived and he point blank refused to eat anything and started lashing out again and screaming. I was trying to feed my daughter as well so just let him leave the table. In the end this made it worse and he started really thrashing on the floor so I put him in his room for safety more than anything. I have just come up to see to him but this means putting my daughter in her cot for a few minutes. I now have two screaming toddlers, neither who I can face and just feel such a failure

Please tell me everyone has days like this and that I can forgive myself for the smack.

kirsty

I think there is not a parent in the world who has not had a day like that. I have lost my temper with dd(cp) in the past and it is horrid as you end up feeling so bad.
don't beat yourself up. tommorow the sun will rise and a new day will start with a nice blank chart. hope it is better for you.

oh you are not alone. I have too many days like that at the moment - dd1 got thoroughly overexcited by all things Christmas and still hasn't really calmed down (and it all comes out, as for you, at nappy change and meal times), and dd2 is 11 months old and NOT impressed when I have to bung her in her cot to deal with dd1.

Tomorrow is another day, I hope it is a better one (for me)

Nothing worse than thrashing child and pooey/weeeie nappy. Have walloped in past, felt shit. They lived and I have to say are the nicest two kids in the world (that's what other people saynot just me) so he's not going to turn into a master criminal because you've smacked him. We all have days like this. It's normal. Unless you are champion lentil weaving earth hello trees and flowers mummy you will have other days like this but they will get fewer.

I remember a group of mums talking and one said 'please God let it not be pe today because my DD has gone to school with my handprint on her thigh' Apparantly it was either that or crashing the car (mega tantrum on way to school over shoes apparantly). I knew how she felt . . .

It's due to be nice tomorrow and as the woman said 'tommorrow is another day'
Cue music (ta NA NANA....)

Thanks guys

Took a five minute breather, went into Daniel's room with daughter and had a cuddle with both and feel much better for it. We all went downstairs and tackled pudding, completely different child (likes his puddings like mummy).

I just felt bad because straight afterwards his leg looked red so I thought I must have hurt him. I didn't intend to hurt him but then again didnt intend to smack

I guess I should have been considerate to the fact that his nappy routine was changed and I knew dinner wasn't one of his favourites.

Our daughter is 20 months and in to everything so I have no choice if I have to see to Daniel upstairs other than to put her in her room. I am getting braver to let her just in her room with the stairgate rather than in her cot.

Anyway, back to cuddles...almost bed time.

Thanks again for your support.